Quand On Se Retrouve Encore
by Momoiro Usagi
Summary: French for 'When we meet again'. Ayame has to face the mistakes he made in the past, and as he works to become a better person, he realizes a love he would have never expected to find. AyamexRitsu CHAPTER 14 NOW UP!
1. Dead Flowers

Hallo everyone! OK, I was planning on writing this story after I finished "Into Ashes All My Lust", but I just got inspired a few nights ago and had to start! I'm not sure how often I will update until I finish working on my other story, but after that updates will come much more frequently. Well, I know this is a very alternative pairing but I think it's really cute and hope everyone enjoys it! Please review!

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"And so, I said, 'I'm so sorry, my dear Ami-chan, but that purple skirt just doesn't compliment your orange shirt." Ayame chuckled vivaciously, scanning his attentive audience with pride. "You should have seen her face!" Waving his arms, he flashed Shigure a mischievous grin. "She looked exactly like a rotten tomato!"

The Sohma cousins roared with laughter. "Oh, Aaya!" Shigure choked out between gasps. "I wish I could have seen that! Did you tell Ha'ri yet?"

"Oh no!" Clasping his hands to his cheeks in an emphatic motion, the snake corrected him. "Don't tell Ha'ri! He'll only accuse me of being mean again, and then I'll feel guilty." Faking a pout, he addressed the crowd of children at his feet. "I'm really not a bad person, am I? I mean, I would never intentionally hurt someone! I'm just trying to be truthful, and I can't help it if the truth hurts."

"Yes, sweet Aaya," Shigure twirled his finger through the other boy's silver locks. "And you can't help it if the truth amuses us, either. You're just having fun." His eyes twinkling, he flashed a 'thumbs up'. "All right!" Whirling around, he clasped his hands around one of the other boy's shoulders. "You agree with me, don't you, Kureno-san?"

"Uh," The rooster stuttered, his face flushing violently. His eyes darted from face to face. "Yes, Shigure-san."

"Of course!" The silver-haired boy rose to his feet, swishing his vivid robe from side to side. He reached down to pat Kureno on the head. "That's my dear cousin!"

The crowd sat captivated by Ayame's dramatic display, hardly noticing as another figure inched toward the back of the group. However, as the boys paused, a meek whisper emerged from the silence. "Ayame-san?"

His green eyes widening, the snake found the source of the voice. "Little Ritsu, what are you doing here?"

"I'm sorry! I'M SORRY! I apologize! I shouldn't be wasting your time, Aaya-san! Forgive me. I don't deserve to talk to you!" His eyes watering, the smaller boy hid a blush behind his kimono sleeve. "I'll leave!" Turning around, the monkey bumped into Kureno in his clumsy rush.

Smirking, the older boys exchanged curious glances. "Now look what you've done to Kureno-san!" Shigure teased, trying to provoke the timid child.

"I'M SORRY, KURENO-SAN! I DON'T DESERVE TO TOUCH YOU! I'M SO CLUMSY!" The redhead collapsed into a trembling heap. "I'm so sorry!"

"It's OK," Kureno hurried to quiet him, dreading the attention from the group. "Don't worry, please. It didn't hurt."

Shigure bit back his laughter. "Just kidding, Ritchan! We were only joking!"

"Now, what was it that you wished to speak to me about?" Ayame pranced forward, holding his head with confidence. "Have you come to tap into my infinite brilliance, or perhaps to hear my humorous anecdote?" The crowd's rapt silence encouraged him, fueling his energy. "Well?"

His body shaking with fear, Ritsu studied his feet. He seemed as if he would shatter under the other boy's watchful gaze. "I brought you something, but you won't like it, so I'll just leave."

"A present? For me?" Aaya clasped his hands together, giggling with glee. "Well, what is it? Come on!"

"N, n, no," The monkey squeaked. "It's ugly! You don't want it. I'm such a failure!" In spite of his protest, the smaller boy extracted something from behind his back. "I found this, and I thought it looked so pretty. It reminded me of you. But if you don't want it, it's fine!" Opening his fist, he revealed a crumpled, brown flower. Even as he moved his hand, the petals shed uselessly to the floor.

"It's dead, my dearest Ritchan," Ayame pointed out, smiling at Shigure.

Horror seized Ritsu's face as he clenched his chest. "I'm so sorry! I've wasted your time. I shouldn't have bothered you like this!" Sobbing, the redhead shredded the withered flower. "It's so ugly! Everything I touch becomes ugly! I shouldn't have thought that I could give you anything worthwhile!"

"Yes, yes. You are correct. Dead flowers are useless." The snake added, snickering expectantly. He was a bit annoyed at the disruption, but the urge to excite the smaller boy even further was his real motivator.

"I know! I'm annoying you! I never do anything right. I shouldn't even talk to you anymore, Aaya-san! You're too good for me!" Stumbling backwards, he shuddered with embarrassment. "I'm so sorry!" Throwing the flower on the floor, he fled frantically down the hallway.

Watching the boy disappear, Ayame and Shigure erupted with laughter. "Why does he do that? Does he honestly think that people will like him better if he apologizes for everything he does?" Ayame shook his head dramatically. "It makes him even worse! He's nothing more than a headache!"

The crowd tittered nervously, staring at the snake as he danced around the room. "He's fun to mess with, isn't he?" Shigure smirked, a playful glint creeping into his eyes.

Another figure appeared in the hall, pacing toward the group with a determined look on his face. "What just happened, Aaya?" Hatori asked in a serious voice.

"Whatever do you mean, my wonderful Ha'ri?" Ayame batted his eyelashes, adopting an innocent tone as he rushed to meet his other cousin. "We were just playing with Ritchan. We didn't mean anything, of course." He chuckled, running his fingers through the other boy's raven locks. "But you know how Ritsu overreacts to everything!"

"He's out in the gardens, crying. You really upset him," The seahorse explained. "What did you do?"

Shigure cut in. "Oh, Ha'ri! Don't worry about it. We were just having fun!"

Ignoring the dog, Hatori brushed his bangs from his face, revealing narrow eyes. "He's a nice person, Aaya. You should think about how other people feel when you're 'having fun' sometime."

"What are you talking about? I'm not _that_ insensitive!" Faking a scandalized sniffle, he swiped his silver hair from his shoulder. "It saddens me to hear you speak so lowly of me."

Hatori's stare softened. "I don't think you understand how his mind works. He's different from you, Aaya."

"Truer words were never spoken!" Shigure interjected with a carefree laugh. "Thankfully, there aren't many people like Ritsu in the world."

The seahorse rubbed his forehead in frustration. "No, there should be more people like Ritsu. He's caring and doesn't want to do anything that could hurt someone else." Facing Ayame, he continued. "It took a lot of courage for him to come here and talk to you. He really admires you, and the only thing he wants is for you to accept him and offer him some measure of friendship. He gave you this flower, didn't he?" Bending over, he scooped up the dry petals in his hands. "He looks up to you. I hope you know that." He reached for the silver-haired boy, sliding the brittle flower into his palm. "Not everything in life is a joke, especially not other people's emotions."

Opening his fingers, the snake sighed at the crumbled mess that was once a cherry blossom. "Dead flowers are ugly and useless to me, and so are people like Ritchan." Clenching his fist, he ground the blossom to dust, feeling upset that Hatori was criticizing him over such a trivial matter. "You really need to lighten up, Ha'ri-kun."

* * *

'They're dead. But I just put them here yesterday!' Ayame thought, gathering the withered mass of roses from the counter and tossing them into a nearby trash can. 'They'll never be beautiful again. What can I do?'

Glancing around his shop, an image of Ritsu's childish face, contorted by the terror of rejection, burned in his mind. 'Why do I have these horrible memories? That happened so many years ago, and yet I can't even look at flowers anymore without thinking of him. I wish I could've been a better person. I was so blind as a child! Everything seemed to revolve around me, and I came to believe that that was how things should operate.'

Gazing at his reflection on the shiny counter top, Ayame moaned. 'Maybe I still think like that. Maybe that's why these nightmares continue to haunt me. Every day, it seems, I must try to amend all the mistakes I made when I was younger. What can I do to erase the past and make everyone forget? I would do anything. Anything!' Tears welling under his piercing eyes, he immediately wiped them away in a vain attempt to prevent his face from swelling. 'What can I do to be a better person when we meet again?'

"Good morning, Ayame-san!" Mine sang, bursting through the door with a cheery smile. "I'm so sorry I'm late! There's some strange woman outside causing a stir, and so many people are watching her! It took forever to get through the crowd." Joining her coworker, her expression softened in concern. "Are you OK? You look sad!"

Regaining composure, Ayame laughed through his tears. "Oh no, I'm fine! Don't worry about me, sweet little Mine!" Resting his chin in his hands, he gave her his attention. "So what's this about a strange woman? Was it the way she looked, or how she was acting? I want to know! Don't withhold such important information from me!"

Mine answered in a giddy voice. "Oh, you should go see, Ayame-san! You'll laugh so hard! She's lying on the pavement, screaming apologies, and nobody even knows what she's apologizing for!" She clapped her hands in excitement. "She's down by the bus stop! Go see for yourself!"

"Apologies?" The snake's pulse quickened, though he hoped his surprise was not visible. _'I'm so sorry! I've wasted your time! I shouldn't have bothered you like this!'_ The words flew through Ayame's head, swirling in dizzying turmoil. 'It couldn't be. Why would he be here?'

"And everyone was laughing at her, and that made her scream even louder!" Mine continued her story, disregarding the silver-haired man's distress. "I hope they call the police soon. I mean, do you think she's safe?"

Dashing to the window, Ayame craned his neck in hopes of catching a glimpse of the disturbance. But all he could see was a clod of people congregating a few feet down the street. 'They're laughing at him? Just like me and Shigure. He doesn't deserve that! Now I know how wrong we were. If it really is Ritsu, well, maybe I can erase what happened in the past right now.'

Waving his arms extravagantly, he masked his concern behind a broad grin. "You are correct, Mine-san! I will go find out what's happening right now!" Opening the door, he left the store and immediately quickened his pace.

"I'M SO SORRY!" A scream resounded above the noisy street, growing progressively louder as Ayame approached the crowd. "I APOLOGIZE TO THE WHOLE WORLD!"


	2. Mint colored Dress

Bonjour! (It just seems appropriate to talk French in this story considering the title:) Which brings me to my next question...Ayame will be using a few little French expression, but nothing too uncommon. Do you think I need to define them at the bottom? (I did for the German in my HaruxMomiji story, but Momiji spoke so much more German than Aaya will speak french.) Well, I'll do it this time. Just tell me what you think:)

So, anyways, I've actually been finished for several days, but since log-in was down :( I couldn't post until now! This story is maybe a little easier to write than my last story. I think it is because both of these characters are fairly predictable. In "Into Ashes All My Lust" Haru confused even me sometimes! It's easy for me to write Aaya just like it was easy for me to write Momiji, probably because those are the two characters that I'm most like. Yay!

I hope you enjoy chapter 2! Please read and review, s'il vous plaît?

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"I'M SORRY! I APOLOGIZE FOR BREATHING! I APOLOGIZE FOR WALKING ON THIS STREET AND TAKING UP THE SPACE I DON'T DESERVE! I'M SO SORRY!"

Ayame's heart fell in his chest as he listened to the resounding screams. 'Ritsu? But why? Why are you here?' Sliding through the crowd, he retained a dignified strut even in his frantic to reach the other boy. 'It seems that you're haunting not only my dreams today.'

"I can't believe I was born so useless and stupid that I can't even find my own school," slumping across the concrete walkway, the monkey choked on his sobs. "I, I, should just die. I hope nobody ever, ever finds me here, and I die! Mother wouldn't be so ashamed anymore! I couldn't ruin people's lives ever again!"

As the snake forced his way through the crowd, he stopped, a sickening feeling spreading through his chest. He could not believe what he was hearing, and the sincerity with which the other man spoke added to his horror. 'How could anyone think so little of his life? Did I do this to him?' Ayame could not bear to consider the thought. Finally breaking through the circle of people surrounding his cousin, the silver-haired man swooped down on the crying figure. "Oh, dear Ritchan! What on earth are you doing here?"

Looking up with terrified eyes, the younger man's cheeks burned with shame. "Ayame-san?" He whispered almost inaudibly. "What, what-," he lost control of his words in a rush of shudders. "I'm so sorry for troubling you! Now you must be embarrassed to be standing here with me! I'M SO SORRY!"

Ayame's eyes narrowed slightly as he heard snickers arise from behind him. However, he hid his annoyance at the onlookers with a carefree laugh. "Oh, don't be silly, Ritchan! I am the great Ayame! I never get embarrassed!" Waving his arms dramatically, he reached a hand to the other boy's crumpled shoulders. "But now really, Ritchan. Is this the time or the place to be practicing your lines for the play?"

Flushing as he watched the snake's hand reach for his arm, Ritsu gave a confused look. "Play?" He squeaked.

"Oh yes," Gaining momentum, the dress designer directed his tale toward the listening crowd. "You must excuse my dearest little cousin! He's appearing in a performance tonight, and he found it necessary to review his part one last time," Ayame's grin sparkled. "Do not be alarmed by his behavior! There's nothing more to see here today." Giving the monkey a purposeful tug, he led them both toward the brightly-decorated storefront. "I am sorry, but the two of us must depart and leave you to go about your ordinary lives." With a final bow, he pushed the younger Sohma through the doorway, hiding him from the goggling stares. "_Au revoir_!"

Ritsu tumbled backwards, sprawling across Ayame's carpeted floor in a frantic attempt to get away from his cousin. "Ayame-san, I'm so sorry I bothered you like this! You must have been busy, and now I'm troubling you with my presence. All because I got lost and rode the wrong bus this morning!" He buried his tan eyes behind his palms, struggling to control the tears that streamed down his face. "I'm so shameless."

"Oh, little monkey-chan! Don't be so dramatic!" Ayame rushed to console the boy, pained by the wretched expression on his younger cousin's face. "It was no trouble at all! See, this is my shop," he gestured proudly to the racks of cloth that surrounded them on all sides. "So I had to walk but a few steps before finding you! Aren't we lucky that you got lost so close to where I live?"

"Thank you so much for helping me." The redhead nodded slightly, his eyes whirling around the room. "This is your shop, Ayame-san?"

"Oh, yes," the snake replied, pride dancing through every word. "And my apartment is right upstairs. Isn't it a charming place?"

"Yes, it's very beautiful," Ritsu agreed completely, his eyes swelling with adoration for the taller man. "I'm too ugly to be here."

Sighing emphatically, the silver-haired man extracted an embroidered handkerchief from his shirt pocket. "Ritchan, Ritchan," he scolded gently as he leaned to clean off the other boy's face. "Whatever are we going to do with you?" The snake's head pounded as he wiped the tears from under the monkey's sticky eyelashes. 'He's crying. Just like he did so many times when Shigure and I made him the butt of our jokes. The day he gave me that flower, I told him that it was ugly. I told him that he was ugly.' Helping Ritsu to his feet, Ayame stood back with an affirming smile. "See, now you look as pretty as anything in this store. You most certainly do belong here!"

"Do you, do you think so?" The younger boy looked surprised, growing flustered as he awaited a response. "No, don't lie. Please don't. I, I shouldn't be flattered by you. You're too good to talk to me."

"Dear Ritchan, why would you ever assume that I'm lying?" He chuckled, twirling his fingers through the cross dresser's tresses. 'I'm not just flattering him,' he thought, bemused as he surveyed the face before him. 'He really is attractive. It's just so hard to notice his face when it's always smudged with tears!'

"Ayame-san?" Mine's voice interrupted them as she peeked out of the storeroom door. "Do we have a customer?" Her arms loaded with a plethora of vibrant dresses, she rushed toward the cash register, piling her load on the counter top as she hastened to satisfy her curiosity. "Can I help?"

"I almost forgot, sweet Mine!" Flashing a broad grin, he eased Ritsu in the direction of his coworker. "We have very special company! This is my cousin, Ritsu Sohma."

"Uh, uh," the monkey dropped his head in a bashful bow. "Pleased to meet you. I hope I'm not bothering you."

"Not at all," Mine replied politely, her eyes scanning the redhead. Her face contorted into a look of shock as she identified the boy in front of her. "I'm just," forming wordless questions behind her smile, she studied Ayame's face expectantly, as if she was waiting for some sort of explanation. "I'm just surprised."

"Yes, Ritchan's visit came as a pleasant shock to me as well," agreeing with the girl, he draped his arm around the younger boy's shoulder. "It isn't every day that my cousins stop by to see me!" His eyes drifted toward the nearby trash can, immediately noticing the wilted roses that stuck out over the rim. 'Especially not after I wished to see them. I feel like this was supposed to happen today. I finally have a chance to change what I did to him as a child. This is my opportunity to get to know him better and show him that I truly do regret the past! This is my time to rid myself of these nightmares forever!' He swung his hands around the room in a fluid motion. "But come, now it is time for the grand tour! Would you like to see the rest of my merchandise?"

"Yes," Ritsu whispered with a sincere smile. However, once he spoke the words he hurried to mask his eagerness. "Of course, that is, if you don't mind."

"Mind?" The silver-haired man gave a hearty laugh, clasping his long fingers around the other boy's arm. "Of course I don't mind! I'm honored to show you," he sounded a bit overenthusiastic as he floated around the room, pointing out extravagant articles of clothing with pride in his voice. "Dearest Mine, you don't mind taking care of the business while I attend to my guest, now do you?"

"No, not at all," she answered swiftly, though still sounding puzzled as she watched her boss's interaction with the timid monkey. "Have fun!"

"We will, we will," the snake pranced between the racks of dresses, the rhythm of his steps demonstrating his excitement. "Now, these are all of my current projects. Most of them, like this one," he extracted a flimsy pink miniskirt, "are special orders custom made to fulfill the fantasies of my closest and best customers." He winked at Ritsu. "You understand, I presume?"

"Oh, um, yes," the other boy trembled in response, analyzing the floor beneath him as he struggled to avoid Ayame's gaze. "Um, I think so."

"Yes, and of course I do everything in confidentiality. I think it is a very important gift to be able to satisfy other people's romantic urges. I am always so glad to know that I've done a great service for these people! I would never want anyone to feel awkward about their sexual preferences. You know, people with fantasies about nurses and maids. Men that prefer to dress like women," finally taking note of the uneasy expression on the other boy's face, he realized that Ritsu did not appreciate the direction of his comments. 'Oops! I thought that would help him feel more comfortable! I guess not.' He digressed immediately. "Of course, some of these are entirely my own creations."

Ritsu regained some of his composure as his eyes probed through the various outfits. "They're all so wonderful. You are so good at designing clothes," his face shone with admiration. "You're so good at everything."

Fighting the urge to agree with him, Ayame attempted an air of modesty. "Nonsense! We all have our talents and our weaknesses, of course." His heart burning as he recognized his own internal battle with selfishness, Ayame laughed off his guilt. "I just happen to design amazing dresses. I'm sure you have talents yourself, right, Ritchan?"

"No," stumbling backwards, the monkey fumbled in his meekness. "No, I'm useless. I'm not good at anything." Tears brimmed instantly under his thick eyelashes, but he sniffed into his sleeve so as to hide his hurt from the older boy. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't bother you with my problems. It's rude of me to talk about myself when I'm here in your lovely shop taking advantage of your hospitality. I'm so sorry."

"I really hope you don't mean that, Ritchan," Ayame stated with a gentle chuckle, though he knew that the other boy did in fact mean every word that he said.

"I, I," one of the dresses on a nearby rack caught the redhead's eye, causing him to lose focus on the conversation. He stepped warily toward the outfit, admiring the soft mint fabric and graceful curves from a distance. "That is very pretty, Ayame-san." He sighed, offering his cousin a reverent smile. "Did you really make the whole thing yourself?"

"Oh yes!" Leaping forward, the snake snatched the tiny dress and held it out to Ritsu. "This is my very own design, and one of my favorites still available in this store. Would you like to try it on?" He asked hopefully, awaiting the other boy's response.

"Oh no, I couldn't! It wouldn't look right," the smaller boy shook his head emphatically, trying unsuccessfully to hide desire for the green garment. "You'd only ruin it if you put it on me."

"Ritchan!" Ayame flashed a dramatic pout, accentuating his disappointment. "I really, really want you to try it on this instant. Won't you do that, for me?" He felt satisfied as he saw the other boy's face soften. He knew that Ritsu would never do anything he thought might trouble his older cousin, even if his wish to satisfy Ayame forced him to drop his shyness and self-loathing for a moment. "I really would like to see you in it."

"Um, well, OK," he replied in a shaky tone, reaching cold fingers to grasp the fabric. "But only if it doesn't bother you."

"Not at all! I've never seen anyone except myself in it before, so I am very excited! You can change over there," he gestured to a silk screen at the far end of the room, "if you'd like." Watching as the other boy disappeared into the cramped dressing room, Ayame's heart warmed. 'He is such a sweetheart! I can't believe anyone can be so grateful and polite!' The snake felt a sense of admiration ebbing at his heart. 'But he can't understand what a good person he is.' He gave a regretful sigh, twirling his fingers around a roll of lacy ribbon. 'I hope he realizes that other people don't hate him, even if they may laugh at him or ignore him. I don't think it's possible for anyone to truly hate someone so gentle!'

"Ayame-san?" the other boy interrupted the snake's thoughts, emerging from behind the screen with a nervous whisper. "I, I-."

"Oh my, you look amazing!" Sashaying forward, the silver-haired man surveyed Ritsu's petite figure and sparkling eyes with awe. "This outfit suits you absolutely perfectly. It looks like it was made for you!"

"No, no," Ritsu tried to protest, his voice trickling away in a fit of shivers. "I mean, it's so gorgeous, and I-."

Ayame wagged his finger playfully. "Now Ritsu, don't you trust my expert opinion on this subject? I know a perfect fit when I see it." His gaze drifted to a baggy spot just below the waistline. "Oh, except, right here," wrapping his arm around the other boy's waist, he tried to tighten the silky bodice. "Right here it would need a little alteration."

His skin jumping under the snake's touch, the monkey bit his lip. "Oh, um, I," his eyes blurred in shame as he tensed at the other man's action. "I, well," he looked absolutely flustered, his chest heaving in an attempt to suppress an impending blush. "Ayame-san?"

The white-haired man studied his companion intently. 'That's interesting,' he marveled at the other boy's obvious uncertainty. 'Does he, hmm, I wonder if he likes me?' Ayame was stunned by the warmth that spread in his chest at the thought. 'Why am I so happy? It won't be the first time I've acquired a little admirer!' Letting his hands linger on the monkey's hips, he flashed a sparkling grin. "You really look positively beautiful! Green is your color! And the shape," he let his fingers travel up Ritsu's side in a flirtatious motion, "emphasizes your figure quite nicely."

His eyes widening, the smaller man ripped away from the caress. "Oh no, I, I'm very sorry." He stared at his feet as he wrung his hands in front of him. "I'm, I'm very shameful."

The snake ignored the other boy's protests, reaching to stroke the monkey's thick locks of hair. "I think you should keep it. Take it as a present!"

"What!" Ritsu squealed, his hands flying to unbutton the delicate dress. "I couldn't do that! I couldn't steal from you and abuse your generosity! You've already given me so much of your time today. I can't accept anything else from you! I should be the one giving you a gift." Tugging the outfit from his body, he flushed in uncontrollable embarrassment. "I'm so sorry if I made it seem like I wanted to take this dress. That was very rude of me! I'm sorry! I'M SO SORRY! I HAVE TO LEAVE YOU RIGHT NOW! I HAVE TO GO TO SCHOOL! I'M SO SORRY FOR WASTING YOUR TIME!"

Catching his younger cousin in an embrace, Ayame hoped to comfort the other boy. "No, no, thank you for coming, sweet little monkey-chan. I haven't seen you for a very long time, so your visit was quite a treat for me. That's why I want to give you this gift. You really must accept it!"

"I, I," the redhead stuttered, hurrying to put on his own silk kimono. "Thank you, but I really need to get to school. I, I, I'm glad I got to see you, too," he mustered a smile.

As he watched the monkey drop the outfit and bustle toward the door, Ayame's head pounded. "Are you sure you don't need any help finding your way to college? You'll surely be late to class if you lose your way again." The snake felt unready to let his guest leave.

"No, no, I couldn't bother you like that." Ritsu assured him, slumping his shoulders in an attempt to hide his fearful expression. "Thank you. I hope you have a nice day."

Reaching to pick up the mint-colored garment, the silver-haired man shook his head. "I'm serious, dear Ritchan! I want you to have this dress. I'll call you as soon as I finish the alterations, and then maybe you can come back and pick it up?" He could not believe the anticipation he felt at the idea of another visit from his cousin. "I really hope you will accept it."

Saying nothing, the timid boy left the store and ran back toward the bus stop.

Ayame watched the retreating form, barely able to understand the heat boiling in his chest. 'I didn't do something wrong, did I? No, of course not! He'll be back. He has to come back. I, I,' he groaned slightly. 'I don't know what's going on with me!'

His eyes darting back toward his coworker, he regained his vivacity and offered a charming grin. "So, what did you think of the amazing Ritsu Sohma?"

* * *

**Français avec Ayame:)**

_Au revoir_- Good bye!

Like I said, not very much to define! Lol! Next chapter...a little bit angsty with Aaya and Yuki. :( It might be a few days before I update, though, because I'm graduating on Saturday!


	3. Lavender Stilettos

OK everyone! After too much delay, I'm finally finished with chapter three:) Thank you to everyone who's been reviewing my story! I think I have 11 reviews by now! I'm so amazed! I never thought this story would be very popular because it is an alternative pairing, but apparently I'm not the only Fruits Basket fan in the world who thinks these two should be together! Anyways, I hope you all enjoy chapter three. Most of this is telephone conversations, which I've never written before so they presented a great challenge. I hope I did OK! Please read and review:)

* * *

'It's pretty, like you,' Ayame's heart leaped as his talented fingers flew over the dress fabric. He worked with familiarity, each stitch appearing in a pattern far more predictable than the man who created them. 'I really hope you will accept this gift, Ritsu. It's the least I can do for you.'

Withdrawing the outfit from under the sewing needle, he studied his work in appreciation. 'Yes, it should be perfect,' he sighed as he saw light spinning over each fold and hem. His mind jumped unwillingly to a picture of his younger cousin, imagining the boy in the silky garment and dreaming that the redhead was standing in front of him once more. Hands tingling as he recalled the shape of the other boy's waist and the warmth each touch elicited on the monkey's cheeks, he laughed in bemused confusion. 'I'm certainly spending too much time on this customer! Perhaps it is because he seems to have developed a little crush on me!'

Rising to his feet and leaving the refinished outfit on his worktable, the snake pranced into the main room of the clothing shop. Immediately catching sight of his assistant, he offered a dazzling grin as he found her with two new customers. "Good afternoon to you both! I am Ayame Sohma, the owner of this enterprise," he bowed dramatically before the two older men. "How may I be of service to you today?"

Mine smiled, producing a tiny purple miniskirt and matching blouse from behind the counter. "They want to buy this, Ayame-san." She looked proud to have sold an item without her boss's help.

"Oh, a fine choice, I assure you!" The silver-haired man waved his arms in excitement. "And for what occasion will you be needing this piece? A party, perhaps?" Picking up the garment and fingering the sheer material, he noted that it was one of the many dresses sized for men. "Is it for one of you, or for someone else, may I ask?"

"Um, it's for me," the smaller of the two men replied shyly. "Our one year anniversary is coming up, and we wanted to try something different," his words teetered off. "You understand, I suppose. One of our friends recommended your store for," he dropped his voice to a whisper, "these sorts of things."

"One year together? How wonderful!" The snake broke the awkwardness in the air with his self-assured response. Clapping his hands in appreciation, he laughed to ease the tension on the other man's face. "So this is something new for you? Hmm," his eyes danced from shelf to shelf around the room. "Would you like to see some accessories to compliment this ensemble? I have a pair of stiletto heels in this precise lavender hue!" Swaggering toward a nearby rack, the silver-haired man swiftly found the shoes. "Ah, yes, right here! What size will you be needing?"

"Nine," the taller man supplied for his boyfriend, flashing a gentle smile. "He wears size nine."

Mine scampered forward, bringing the delicate footwear to the customers. "Here, I can help you try them on!" Kneeling down, she eased the man's feet into the unusual shoes. "What do you think?"

"Lovely! Simply lovely!" Ayame nodded emphatically, throwing his hair over his shoulders.

"Yes," the taller of the two men told his lover. "They look very good on you." Meeting Mine's hopeful gaze, he chuckled. "We'll take them."

Hurrying forward, Ayame snatched the stilettos from his employee. "I will go wrap these, dearest Mine. Now you must finish ringing up the purchases for these nice men." Clasping his hand on her shoulder, he turned back toward the storeroom. "I will find the packaging for these items."

"OK, Ayame-san," she sang as she started to click at the cash register buttons.

Leaving the room, the snake quickly found a haphazard pile of boxes. Folding the outfit with deft fingers, he started to search for something in which to wrap the shoes. 'Oh, I guess I can use the newspaper,' he strutted to the backdoor of the shop, laughing as he located a mound of unopened periodicals, most of them faded due to excessive exposure to the sun. 'I don't even know why I bother to get these delivered,' he sighed in amusement. 'They are far too boring to read! Well,' sifting through the pile, he located the freshest looking paper and began to wrap the shoes. 'At least they are good for something.'

As he prepared to discard the half-used newspaper, however, a picture caught the silver-haired Sohma's eye. There, staring back at him, a photograph of his younger brother and his friend, Tohru Honda, adorned the Entertainment section under the title: "Local High School Set to Perform 'Romeo and Juliet'." The snake's mouth gaped in surprise. "Yuki?" He asked aloud. "Yuki's going to play Romeo? My little bother has the lead in the school drama!" He felt delighted as he studied the younger boy's soft smile. "Well, of course he was cast as the main character. He's certainly handsome and talented enough! He has my charm, which will make him simply perfect for such a demanding role!"

Skimming the article for details about the performance, Ayame's mood dampened sharply. 'The play is tomorrow,' he realized, his stomach clenching as his excitement melted away. 'But, why? Why didn't anyone tell me?'

He bit his lip, suppressing any uncertainty as he forced his body to regain its cheery aura. Rising to his feet and sashaying back to the customers, he unloaded the packages into their arms. "Good luck to you both!" His voice sounded falsely sunny. "I really do hope you two have an amazingly romantic anniversary!" Dancing toward the dark-haired girl, he whispered into her ear. "Nice sale, little Mine-san. Now I must call my brother and discuss an important issue with him. You don't mind taking over here for a little longer, right?"

"Of course not!" She blushed at his compliment, meeting him with a sincere smile. "Take all the time you need!"

"_Merci beaucoup_!" He waved his arms in a fluid motion, floating up the stairs and to the door of his apartment. As he stepped inside, however, he immediately dropped his joyful façade. 'I hope Yuki didn't mean anything by not inviting me. It had to be a mistake! Doesn't he know how much I love the theater?' Ayame tried to console himself, although he knew that his attempts at reassurance were in vain. Reaching shaky hands for his cell phone, he dialed Shigure's number in desperation.

"Hello Aaya!" The dog's voice greeted him immediately from the other end of the phone line.

The silver-haired man's heart lightened slightly at the sound of his friend's voice. "Hello, my sweet Gure-kun! How are you on this lovely afternoon?"

"I'm doing much better now that I'm talking to you, my darling Aaya," the snake heard Shigure joke flirtatiously. "You couldn't wait until you closed shop for the evening to call me? How sweet of you!" Ayame couldn't help but smile as the dog's voice filled the phone with laughter.

Twisting his fingers through his silver tresses, Ayame felt somewhat revitalized by the normalcy of Shigure's tone. "I'm so sorry, beautiful Gure-kun. _Je t'aime_, of course! But I wasn't calling for you." Taking a deep breath, he closed his eyes and willed his voice to remain steady. "I wish to speak to Yuki."

"Oh, now you're hurting my feelings, Aaya," the man at the other end of the line replied sarcastically. "And all this time I truly believed that you wanted me." Putting an end to his teasing, he gave a hearty chuckle. "Sorry, but Yuki is at, I mean, he's not here right now."

"He's at," the snake's heart dropped once more as he sensed his brother's true location, "he's at drama practice. Right, Gure?"

"Oh," Shigure gasped slightly before regaining his composure. "You are a brilliant little snake, Aaya! Yes, yes, he and Tohru are rehearsing their little romance right now. But not to worry, because he should be getting home very soon." Trying to change the topic, the dog brushed any more talk of the play aside. "So, how was business today? Did you do your part to fill the world with passion and sexuality, as you always do so very well?"

"Oh yes," Ayame stared at the wall in front of him, finding it hard to feel flattered by his cousin's compliments while worrying that he had been left out of an important family event. "Why didn't anyone tell me that Yuki was going to be in the school play?" The silver-haired man's voice sounded strangely serious as his eyes blurred unwillingly.

"Is that what this is about?" Shigure tittered, sounding slightly uneasy. "Don't you worry about that, sweet little Aaya-kun. It really isn't a big deal. Not many people are coming, and we all just assumed that you would be bored watching something like 'Romeo and Juliet'. If I were you, I would feel happy that I didn't have to go."

In the privacy of his home, the snake made no attempt to mask his depression, instead slumping onto the couch in a motion of anxiety. "I really love the theater. You remember our high school days, don't you, Gure-kun? I was in the drama club. I was always receiving the lead roles." Giving an exaggerated moan, he flipped over onto his stomach. "I would have liked to see him perform."

"It's just, well, you know how he can be, Aaya," the dog attempted an explanation. "Don't get all upset about it." Laughing lightheartedly, the other man's voice rose, directing itself not into the phone but to someone else on that end of the line. "Well, speak of the devil, if it isn't Yuki himself! Yuki-kun, come here, your brother wants to talk to you."

Silence. Ayame shook his head, feeling dread spreading in his chest as he anticipated hearing the younger boy's voice. 'I have to do it right this time,' he silently hoped for an opportunity to reach his brother. 'I have to say the right things. I must make up for my past mistakes and show him that we really should strengthen our bond. I cannot fail again! I will not.'

Readjusting the phone against his ear, the silver-haired man strained to identify the rat's voice amongst the chatter on the other side of the phone line. "No, no, I don't want to," the younger Sohma's angry tone burned into Ayame's mind. "Tell him I can't talk, I," the arguments faded into stillness, leaving the snake with the icy fear of being rejected once more.

Suddenly, however, Yuki's frustrated response swelled into the earpiece. "What do you want?"

His chest nearly collapsing in pain at the boy's sharp greeting, Ayame struggled to keep the cell phone between his fingers. 'Yuki, Yuki, I just want to talk to you,' he tried to answer, but the words caught in his throat. All he managed to muster was a boisterous, "Good afternoon, my dearest little brother!"

No response.

"I trust that drama practice went well," Ayame wasted no time in bringing up the subject that weighed on his mind. Even though he was a little uncertain, the silver-haired Sohma did not like to put off important matters, rather facing them precisely when he needed to. "You are not nervous, of course! I never got stage fright. You know, I was in several productions throughout my high school years, and I always played the romantic hero. That's just one more thing we have in common, I suppose!" Praying that his emphasis on the two boys' similarities would create an outlet for connection, the older man's voice brightened. "I really want to see you tomorrow night. I'm so proud of you! Why didn't you tell me about the drama sooner?"

"You're not invited," Yuki's reply was cold and lifeless, leaving little room for argument. "You'll only embarrass me if you come."

Regrets pulsed through Ayame's veins, stinging at his heart and leaving him feeling isolated and drained. "Oh, Yuki, I would never do such a thing!" He made an attempt to sway the younger boy, though his voice had lost its vivacity. He felt helpless. 'Yuki, why would you say that?' He asked silently. 'Everybody likes me! I don't know why you are ashamed of me. I try so hard.'

"You always do," Yuki accused the older man. "And you don't even care that the people around you don't want to be near you. You just impose yourself on everyone because you want attention. I don't want the people at school to know I have a brother like that."

"Yuki!" Ayame hoped that the other boy could not hear the tears that welled in his throat. "Yuki, please, I want to come!" Tracing his numb hands across the posh sofa fabric, the silver-haired man felt lost. 'I didn't mean to annoy you!' He protested internally. 'Really, I just wanted to be a good brother. All I want is to be your friend. I don't understand!'

"You want to come?" Yuki retorted sharply, losing any trace of the control that he usually kept on his words. "What about what I want? You are so selfish." Not giving his brother a chance to respond, the rat added in a frigid voice. "It isn't like you gave me a moment of your time when you were my age."

Click. Ayame heard the younger boy disappear with a slamming of the phone, instantly wishing that he could go back and redirect the conversation. 'Oh God, Yuki!' Groaning dejectedly, the tall man curled up into a position far more vulnerable than his usually-confident posture. 'What did I do wrong this time?'

Clenching a fist around his silky locks, the snake felt tremors rattle his body. Images of the past haunted his thoughts like a cloud of smoke that lingers long after the fire is put to rest. A little boy was crying. Reaching for him. Needing him. But he turned away, far more concerned with his own life than the troubles of his only brother. 'I was selfish,' he realized emptily. 'And now I have to pay for that with every day of my life. I've lost my family, and it feels like nothing I can do will bring them back to me.'

Examining the cell phone that rested uselessly in his palm, the dress designer longed for some distraction to elevate his mood. 'Ritsu,' dreams of his younger cousin brought an unexpected warmth to his chest. 'I need to tell him that I finished the dress. Yes, yes, I need to talk to him.' Without giving any more consideration to the matter, his fingers flew over the buttons and entered the familiar number for the main Sohma estate.

"Hello, Sohma Residence!" A sunny voice filled Ayame's ear. "This is Momiji speaking!"

"Oh, hello, little Bunny-kuns! You sound absolutely splendid!" Regaining his attitude of regal cheerfulness at the idea of speaking to the monkey again, the older man offered a sparkling laugh. "How is school going for you?"

"Oh, it's great!" The rabbit responded with enthusiasm. "We're doing a play right now, and I got a really big part! I get to be Benvolio. He's one of Romeo's best friends! It's so fun! Kyo is Mercutio. He's another one of Romeo's family members. Haru gets to be Tybalt, and he and Yuki get to have a big sword fight. Yuki's Romeo, by the way. You're going to come see us tomorrow night, right?"

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Momiji-kun, but I can't come," Ayame forced himself to remain upbeat, giving the younger boy little more insight into his problems. "I would love for you to tell me more about this at a later time, but right now I must speak to Ritchan. Could you go get him for me?"

"Ritsu?" The younger boy sounded a bit surprised, but still retained his happy demeanor. "Of course! Just a minute!"

Taking a deep breath, Ayame listened intently to the noises at the other end of his phone line. He heard the German boy scampering through the house, opening doors and asking the other family members about the monkey's whereabouts. Finally, the snake noted a whispering voice that he decided must be Ritsu's. 'Oh good, Ritchan! I can't wait to talk to you!' The weight in his chest seemed to dissolve as he remembered the other boy's sweet smile and blushing face. 'You make me so happy.'

"Of course he wants to talk to you, Ritsu-san!" Momiji giggled loudly. "Why else would he call? Here, come on, say 'hello' to him!"

After a short time, the rabbit's voice was replaced by a much softer tone. "Hello, Ayame-san."

"Hello, my favorite little monkey!" Ayame pulled himself off of the sofa, smiling in sincere pleasure. "Just the person I want to hear!"

"No, no," the other boy's voice was barely audible. "You don't want to. I mean, I-."

Ayame sighed dramatically, spinning from side to side around his room. "Oh yes, I've been thinking about you all day! I finished your dress, and I want to know when I can come bring it to you!"

"I'm sorry, I, I can't take it. Really, I don't deserve anything from you," the snake could hear his cousin quivering in fear at the other end of the phone line. "You've done so many nice things for me, and I'm not worthy of taking any more from you! I can't! I-."

The silver-haired man cut him off with words of reassurance. "You won't be taking it from me, silly Monkey-chan! I'm giving it to you!"

"No, n, n, no," Ritsu's voice cracked with tears. "I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! I shouldn't be talking to you! Good-bye!"

"Ritchan? Ritchan, come back!" Ayame demanded as he heard the other boy's voice fade away. Staring into the phone's earpiece, he felt pained by the loss of the monkey's voice. "Come back, Ritsu!" Throwing himself against the wall, he felt even worse than before he called his timid cousin. 'You sound so afraid of me? Why? Why can't I just erase the past? I care about you now! I care about all of you: Yuki, Ritsu, and everyone else I ever pushed away. I want you to see that I'm different! Please, please give me a chance!'

Sliding to the floor, the snake buried his face in his hands. "I have to see you again, Ritchan. Even if I have to come get you myself!"

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**Français Avec Ayame (#2)**

_Merci Beaucoup_- Thank you very much

_Je t'aime_- I love you

I'm going on vacation for a week so I won't have computer access. :( I'll try to at least write chapter 4 while I'm gone, and then I can type it as soon as I get home.

...next chapter...Ayame pays Ritsu's college a visit:)


	4. Spilled Paints

OK! That took a little longer than expected, but finally it's finished:) Yay! I don't know if Ritsu paints, but it just seems like something he would do, and I had to think of something for him to study at college. Well, I hope everyone enjoys this! Thanks for all the reviews!

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"_Excusez-moi_, my beautiful young ladies. I must ask a favor of you both," offering a deep bow, Ayame dazzled a pair of flustered girls with his flattery. He tightened his grip on an awkward pink package, glancing to either side of the college cafeteria. "I am searching for my dearest little cousin, Ritsu Sohma. Are you acquainted with him?"

Studying the snake's graceful features, the taller of the two girls blushed. "Oh no, um, I'm sorry, I'm not sure I know him."

"Oh, no, no, no," the silver-haired man chuckled, sweeping his arms through the air. "I am quite sure you know my sweet Ritchan." He counted on his fingers to emphasize each point of his description, "a very beautiful redhead, usually wears girls' kimonos, always apologizing for something. He's a freshman, I believe. Surely you have seen him before?"

"Oh, I know that boy," the other girl interjected, pride dancing through her voice as she noted Ayame's satisfied grin. "But, well, I'm not quite sure where he goes at lunchtime. I mean, I've never noticed him in here."

"Do you think he finishes class before noon? Maybe he goes home," the taller girl added matter-of-factly, gazing at the snake with sparkling eyes. "Or he might eat out in the gardens. I used to do that my first year, before I met people to sit with."

"A wonderful idea!" The snake took pleasure in the awestruck expression on the girl's faces. "That sounds like precisely the place where my cousin would choose to hide." Throwing his shining locks over his shoulder, he smiled vehemently. "Thank you for all your help. It was a pleasure meeting you today," he winked as he turned to leave. "Good bye."

As the two students disappeared behind him, Ayame quickened his pace to an excited strut. 'I promised that I would come find you, darling Ritchan,' studying each cluster of students, he wished to catch sight of the other man. 'I just cannot keep you out of my head. You fascinate me, I suppose. I'll never forget the blushing smile you showed me that day in my shop. I must see it again!'

Warmth spread in his chest as he burst through a door and out into the welcoming sunshine. Although the gardens carried an aura of deep-seated serenity, he felt only bubbly and giddy. Clapping his hands together, he danced with anticipation over the stony path. 'Ritsu, are you here? I cannot wait to see you in this dress once more! You looked positively perfect last time. It's a shame that you don't see how amazing you truly are.'

He stopped suddenly, noticing a willowy figure positioned between two maple trees. Sighing with contentment, he watched as the redhead leaned over an easel, smiling at the look of concentration on the other boy's face. Even at a distance, Ayame could see the soft smile that painted his cousin's features. "Ritchan? Oh, Monkey-chan?" The snake attempted to shake the other boy from his daze. "I've brought you a present!"

Screaming in surprise, the younger boy whipped around. "Ayame-san," he cried, hurrying to cover the painting. In his fumbling, however, his palette clattered to the ground, sending a shower of color down the front of his kimono and onto the grass. "Oh no! I'm so sorry! I never do anything right! Look how clumsy I am!" He trembled, bending over and nearly collapsing with shame.

Dropping his package at his feet and giving the other boy a concerned smile, the silver-haired man attempted to ease the canvas from the monkey's grip. "Now, don't be silly, Ritchan! If you don't calm down, you might destroy this magnificent piece of art."

"No! It's ugly! I'm a horrible painter! I should just throw it away," Ritsu insisted, trying unsuccessfully to keep the artwork in his arms, hoping to hide it against his body. Looking up at Ayame with teary eyes, he silently pleaded for a change of subject. "What are you doing here, Ayame-san?" He managed to squeak out.

"I believe the question should be, 'what were you doing?'" Ayame nodded, answering his own question. "And I believe I saw you painting, so therefore you should show me what you were working on! It would be the polite thing to do, of course." Catching the younger Sohma off-guard, Ayame finally managed to snatch the canvas from the redhead's grip. Smiling, he examined the piece through a break of light between the two trees. "Ritchan, this is lovely!" He replied sincerely, his eyes flying over the impressionistic landscape with enchanted fascination. "It's positively fabulous!"

"You, you," Ritsu's eyes widened hopefully, "you really think so?" His trust seemed to transform into disbelief, and pain overtook his features. "No, no, you must be lying!"

"Would I _ever_ lie to someone as sweet as you?" Ayame's fingers crawled automatically to the other Sohma's cheeks, teasing the heated skin as he cupped the cross dresser's face in his hand. He delighted in the embarrassed flush that he elicited from the timid boy's features. "Now tell me, Ritchan," his voice softened, "are you studying art here at school, or is it just a hobby?"

"I, I," Ritsu gasped at his cousin's gentle actions, looking away as he tried to regain his voice, "I'm majoring in art. I, um, I want to be a painter. I just don't have enough talent. I guess it's useless of me to try."

The silver-haired man glanced toward the painting in his other hand. "You don't lack any talent, and it is certainly never useless to try! If you want to be a painter, then you will be an amazing painter! Perhaps you will even become famous someday! Wouldn't that be grand?" Giving the redhead one last, encouraging pat, Ayame let his hand fall from the other boy's face.

Ritsu's eyes sparkled for a moment, looking at his cousin with amazement. "No, I don't really think," his gaze drifting to his feet, he flinched automatically as he noticed the splattered paint. "Look at this mess! I'm so stupid!" Rubbing the fabric of his robe, he tried, in vain, to extract the messy stains. "Oh no!"

Dropping carefully to his knees, the snake clasped the younger boy's hands and cleaned them with his silky handkerchief. "No need to worry about these clothes! You won't be needing them anymore today!"

Ritsu bit his lip in horror, nearly stumbling backward, "what, what-?"

"Oh yes, what I meant was, you will not need to wear this dirty robe to class, because I brought you a gift!" Chuckling at the younger boy's antics, Ayame reached a graceful arm toward his nearly-forgotten package. "Yes, as I told you last night, I finished the alterations on your dress. Now it seems you have no choice but to accept it!"

"I can't, I, I deserve to wear ugly, ruined clothes! That's all I'm worth," turning away from the snake, Ritsu gathered his easel and canvas and tried to leave the other man. "Thank you for visiting me today. You really shouldn't have gone through all this trouble for me! But I need to get going now."

"Ritchan! You really must stop acting like this!" Groaning with exaggerated frustration, the silver-haired man opened the pink box and withdrew a familiar green outfit from beneath a pile of tissue paper. "And after I went through all the trouble to visit you! I'm hurt that you do not want to be around me, sweet little Ritchan! You must really hate this dress if you will not even put it on for me."

"That's not it!" The monkey demanded, waving his arms in front of his body. "I can put it on! I'll put it on right now!" Ripping his kimono from his body, he snatched the green dress from his companion's arms. However, as his clothing fell off his shoulders and down to his feet, he flinched with disgrace. "I, I," he struggled to cover his naked form, a look of panic overtaking his features. He spun away from the other man's watchful eyes. "I'll wear it," he whispered in defeat.

"That's right, pretty little Ritchan," letting his fingers slither up his cousin's bare back, he casually caressed the other man's silky hair. 'Ritsu, you are so lovely. If only you could see what I see when I look at you. You make me feel at peace somehow, even when you are screaming and crying. I never would have thought I could grow so fond of someone like you. You're full of surprises, I suppose.' Studying the monkey's body as it disappeared under the mint fabric, Ayame's heart leaped with joy. "Come on, turn around. I must see how perfect my dress looks on you!"

Spinning around, Ritsu studied the ground in fear. "Does it, does it look OK?" He stuttered, taking a deep breath. "I don't ruin it?"

"Where would you ever get a foolish idea like that?" Ayame laughed, surveying the other boy with fascination. His pulse quickened as he noted the soft lines of the dress as they clung to the monkey's figure. "You look amazing."

"It's just that, well, um, sometimes," Ritsu sighed, trying to gain composure, "sometimes people make fun of me for the way I look. I guess I'm really shameless, wearing girls' clothes."

"Don't listen to them, Ritchan," the silver-haired man pleaded, meeting the other boy's shy gaze with concerned eyes. "You should dress the way you want to dress. It doesn't matter what they think!" Losing control of his hands as they snaked around the cross dresser's slender waist, Ayame enjoyed the heat of the other man's body. "I think you are perfect, and I should know, shouldn't I?"

Finally finding the strength to look up at his cousin, Ritsu face beamed with happiness. "Thank you, Ayame-san. Thank you very much." He shivered under the other man's touch, melting into the caresses. "Ayame-san, I, I," his blush deepened, "last night on the phone you sounded sad. Are you OK?" Quickly trying to reclaim his words, the monkey yanked away from the snake's embrace. "Never mind. I shouldn't have asked! That was very rude of me!"

The taller man ignored the boy's protests, "Yes, last night I received some very distressing news from my brother." Ayame found no trouble opening up to his younger cousin, and continued his tale with ease. "Apparently he is starring in his school's production of 'Romeo and Juliet' tonight, but he does not wish for me to attend because he is embarrassed by me. I just want to be a better brother to him, but every time I try to get close, he pulls away." He sighed emphatically, "I just don't know what I should do about him!"

"I'm sorry," Ritsu dropped his head, not seeming to know what else he could say to comfort the other man. "Is Tohru playing Juliet?"

"Yes, yes, of course! You know how those two are!" Ayame brightened slightly at the change of topic. "I just hope that they can see how wonderful they are for each other before it is too late! Miss Tohru makes Yuki so happy. I only wish I could make him smile the way she does."

"Tohru is very nice," Ritsu added wistfully, grinning slightly at the other man. "I really hope they get together, I mean, if they want to. It's really hard, um, well," he stumbled over the words, hiding behind his blush, "when you like someone but you can't talk to him about it. But Tohru-san is really brave! Maybe she can tell him how she feels."

'Ritchan, are you talking about me?' Ayame wondered, eyeing the other man suspiciously. His own pulse quickened expectantly. 'Please be talking about me!' Surveying the redhead with quizzical eyes, Ayame's voice swelled with confidence and vivacity. "Unrequited love is a horrible thing! Some people say 'it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all', but I do not believe it at all. When you really love someone, but he will not return your feelings or you are simply too afraid to try, that is the worst feeling on earth. That feeling of regret is miserable!"

Ritsu nodded shyly, his fingers fumbling with the hem of his skirt. "Uh huh," his eyes darkened with obvious hurt.

Sympathy seized Ayame's chest. He could feel almost every ounce of the monkey's pain as he stared into the pair of sparkling tan orbs in front of him. Understanding. He glimpsed Ritsu's heart for just a moment, and all the self-loathing and nervousness he found hit him with a wave of shock. For the first time, he felt for someone else. He cared about this timid boy. He wanted him to be happy. 'Ritchan, you're wonderful! Don't be afraid of yourself!'

Stepping forward, the silver-haired man caught Ritsu's trembling hands in his fingers. "I have a marvelous plan!" He changed the subject, hoping to bring back the other man's smile. "Why don't we go to the play together tonight? Perhaps I can show Yuki that I care for him so much that I'll even go against his wishes in order to see him! Will you please come with me?" Bringing the smaller man's palm to his lips, Ayame planted a feather-light kiss on the clammy skin. "Please don't say 'no' to me! I really want you to come!"

Ritsu gasped at the kiss, his whole form freezing with terror. "I, I, I guess," he stuttered, struggling to catch his breath. "I can come."

"How wonderful!" Ayame laughed, swinging his arms through the air with excitement. "I'll see you tonight, my dearest little Monkey-chan!" Turning to leave, he gave a carefree giggle, as if nothing had happened. But inside he dwelled on the feel of Ritsu's skin against his lips. 'That felt,' his stomach tingled pleasantly as he replayed the kiss in his mind, 'right.'

* * *

**Français avec Ayame #4**

_Excusez-moi_- excuse me!

Next chapter...Romeo and Juliet! I can't wait! I love Shakespeare!


	5. Smashed Bouquet

Ugh...I keep writing this whole thing and then the page expires! I'm so mad! Anyways. I haven't updated in a while. I'M SORRY! I'M SORRY! I'M SO SORRY! (It's sad when the writer starts to copy her characters!) Well, I hope everyone enjoys this story! Just a side note, I swear I don't hate Yuki! I love him! I swear! He just always turns into the mean one in my stories:) lol!

* * *

"Gure-kun! Ha'ri! What a surprise!" Scrambling down a crowded row, Ayame waved excitedly to his cousins. Scanning the auditorium, the snake flashed his companions a satisfied grin. "How nice to see you on a glorious night such as this one. The show is nearly sold out! Dearest little Yuki will be so proud."

"Oh! Um, Aaya?" The dog gave him a questioning look. "What are you-?" Watching the silver-haired man's glittering eyes, he backed down. "I mean, what a surprise to see you!"

"Oh yes," Ayame waved his arms majestically, placing an elaborate bouquet of flowers on the floor and sliding into a nearby seat. "Well, I just knew that I couldn't miss an event like this one, so I decided to bring my Ritchan for a wonderful evening, and," turning around, he gasped, his eyes wildly searching the room, "wait, where did he get off to now?"

"You brought Ritchan?" Shigure laughed, his hand flying to his lips. "Yuki is not going to be happy, you know!" Grinning with bittersweet amusement, the dog met the doctor's gaze, wordless concern passing between them.

Ignoring the two men, Ayame retraced his steps, wondering at the dependence of the other man. 'How could he have gotten lost like this?' He sighed dramatically, scanning then audience for some sign of the other boy. 'And here, of all places, where he might bump into a woman and-.'

"I'm so sorry!" A moan echoed through the theater, causing Ayame to whirl around in recognition. "I'm so sorry. I don't deserve to ask you for directions. I really can't infringe on you like that! It's all my fault because I got lost! I'm not worthy of talking to you!"

'Oh, little Ritchan!' The snake smiled, soft pleasure playing on his features as he hurried to retrieve the other Sohma. 'I hope you aren't creating too much excitement.' Strutting quickly up the aisle, he traced the yells to a huddle of student ushers at the back of the large space. "Dearest Ritsu, what are you doing now?" He interrupted the cries, catching the onlookers' gazes with his dramatic entrance.

"I, I," Ritsu looked up at the other man, his face darkening with shame. Shrinking under the students' watchful eyes, his stare dropped to the floor. "I'm sorry, Ayame-san. I shouldn't have gotten lost. I-."

Wagging his finger in an exaggerated motion, the older man stepped forward, grinning at his companion as he let one arm fall easily around his shoulders. "Not to worry, sweet Ritchan," he chuckled as he felt the monkey's body tense beneath his touch, "But come; now we must get to our seats. Yuki-kun is about to become famous, and we are all here to witness it! Yes, my little brother will soon be a star." Winking at the surrounding children, he bowed emphatically. "Thank you all for taking good care of my date! I hope you enjoy the show!"

Spinning around, Ayame chuckled at the flush on the redhead's face. "Oh, Ritchan, you look so cute when you blush like that," the words escaped his mouth automatically as he reached a protective arm around the other man's waist. Beaming at the crowd of gawking students, the snake offered one last bow before leading the other man toward their seats. "And you especially look fabulous this evening," he studied Ritsu's collared shirt and khakis with a satisfied nod, "although you always look amazing in dresses, men's clothes truly do suit you."

"N, n, no," the monkey stumbled with surprise, unable to believe the other man's words as he tried to catch his breath. "I don't-."

"You do," Ayame corrected him. "You absolutely do! And I would know, wouldn't I?" Following the monkey's movements with his eyes, he felt warmth spreading through his chest. 'It's true. He really is beautiful.' Sighing quietly, he shrugged his shoulders. 'What's gotten into me lately? I must have spring fever or something! I'm acting like a high school girl with a crush!'

Directing the other man to a packed row, Ayame helped Ritsu to his seat. "Not to fear, Ha'ri and Gure!" He chuckled with satisfaction at the disbelief on his friends' faces. "It seems that poor Ritchan got lost. But, of course, I found him almost immediately." Clasping his hand on the redhead's shoulders, he patted the other boy affectionately.

"How nice to see you, Ritchan," Shigure attempted a polite nod, still looking both bewildered and entertained by the whole situation.

"Hello Shigure-niisan! Hello Hatori-niisan" Ritsu's head dropped automatically. "I hope I'm not bothering you."

"Not at all," the dog shook his head at the other man's behavior, staring at his silver-haired friend with amused eyes. "I hope Aaya is treating you well."

The cross dresser's gaze flew to the hand resting on his shoulder, and his blush deepened. "Of course!" Ritsu squeaked a bit too loudly. "Ayame-san is so nice to me. I don't deserve it. I really don't-."

"Shh! Shh!" Ayame brought one slender finger to the other man's lips, giggling flamboyantly. "Now, now Monkey-kun. Don't lie to Gure-kun like that." Running his fingers through his silver tresses, he sighed. "If you didn't deserve to be talked to, do you think _I_ would be wasting my time with you right now?" He leaned back in his seat, reveling in the flush on the other man's features. "No, I enjoy being with you, sweet little Ritchan. You know that!"

The dog and the seahorse exchanged tentative glances, both staring at Ayame in astonishment. "Aaya," Hatori's voice came quietly, sounding like a warning as it cut off the other man. But he could not continue, for at that moment the lights dimmed and the curtain opened, leaving the doctor to wonder alone.

Relaxing in his chair, the snake released his hold on the redhead, focusing entirely on the play in front of him. 'I just hope this will prove to Yuki how much I care about him! I'm so proud of him, and I really hope I can show him that!' Gasping delicately, Ayame's hands flew to his face. "Look, Ritchan!" He gestured toward a familiar blonde figure. "It's Momiji-kun! Oh!" He pointed out a boy carrying a long rapier. "And there's Haru-kun! Isn't this exciting?"

The snake listened intently to the dialogue, his hands trembling with excitement as he watched the scene unfold. Suddenly, he saw a tunic-clad boy enter and flash a charming smile at the audience. "Look, there's Yuki-kun!" Ayame's heart skipped with pride as he waited for the audience's reaction. 'That's my brother.'

_But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?  
It is the east, and Juliet is the sun.  
Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon,  
Who is already sick and pale with grief,  
That thou her maid art far more fair than she:  
Be not her maid, since she is envious;  
Her vestal livery is but sick and green  
And none but fools do wear it; cast it off._

The snake sighed; taking pride in the rat's every word. His gaze wandered to his timid companion, and he felt his heart clench unexpectedly at the striking sight. He watched Ritsu's eyes as they overflowed with empathetic emotion, and caught sight of a smile as it played on the monkey's illuminated features. 'He looks so gentle when he smiles like that,' Ayame realized, studying the other boy's face with rapt fascination, 'and so kind. But he is kind and gentle. I admire him for that.'

_It is my lady, O, it is my love!_

Heat raced through the silver-haired man's veins as he watched his companion. 'Why does he make me feel this way? This is Ritsu, the boy I used to make fun of when we were children. But things are different now, aren't they? I am finding deep admiration for the people I looked down upon, realizing that I might not be at the center of the universe after all. I'm seeing the beauty in other people.' He bit his lip as he studied the other man's soft features, drinking in the sincere benevolence that danced through the monkey's eyes. 'I love him.'

_O, that she knew she were!  
She speaks yet she says nothing: what of that?  
Her eye discourses; I will answer it._

'I love him,' Ayame considered the thought, clasping his hands together gleefully. 'That's wonderful!' Stirring in his seat, he caught the monkey's attention, beaming at him with excitement.

Giving the snake a concerned look, Ritsu mouthed silently, "Are you OK, Ayame-san?"

"Yes, yes, of course," he whispered in response, turning his attention away in hopes of pulling Ritsu's focus back to the performance. Then, resuming his assessment of the smaller man, Ayame heart pounded with elation. 'Why can't he see how wonderful he is? He's an amazing painter, and stunningly well-dressed, but that doesn't seem to mean anything to him. He's always trying to make the people around him happy. He's looking for acceptance in another person.' Sighing, the snake let one of his hands sneak into the monkey's lap, his fingers tingling as they closed around the other man's palm. 'If only he could see himself through my eyes. Maybe he would realize how amazing he is.'

_I am too bold, 'tis not to me she speaks:  
Two of the fairest stars in all the heaven,  
Having some business, do entreat her eyes  
To twinkle in their spheres till they return. _

In Ayame's grip, the monkey's hand fell numb and lifeless. The redhead bit his lip, his gaze darting questioningly to the other man as he began to tremble uncontrollably. "Ayame-san?" He whispered, nervousness cutting through each word. "I, I-." His eyes darkened as he felt to other man's fingers caress the back of his hand, tears brimming under his thick lashes. "What?"

Watching the stage lights as they shimmered and sparkled through the monkey's tears, Ayame nodded his head. "It's OK, my Ritchan. It's OK," he attempted a reassuring tone, letting his fingers slide up and down the other man's arm.

Ritsu shivered under the snake's caresses, his chest heaving with panic. Snatching his arm away from the other man, he closed it around his body, shaking his head frantically. "No, please don't, please," his voice grew a bit louder, attracting his cousins' attention as it cracked with shame. "You don't want to, I-."

_What if her eyes were there, they in her head?  
The brightness of her cheek would shame those stars,  
As daylight doth a lamp; her eyes in heaven  
Would through the airy region stream so bright  
That birds would sing and think it were not night._

The silver-haired man stared at his companion, enchanted by the cross dresser's shining eyes. The glowing tan orbs reflected a sort of compassion, a true love for other people. But they were also lined with sadness, regrets, and the marks of a crushed spirit. 'He looks just like he did that day when we were children,' the snake recalled, embarrassment gripping his heart. 'His eyes. They were crying then, too. They seemed to plead for love, just like they do now. And they looked afraid that day, as well, just like now.' He grimaced, wrenching his stare from the other man's face as remorse seized his thoughts. 'Is he afraid of me?'

_See, how she leans her cheek upon her hand!  
O, that I were a glove upon that hand,  
That I might touch that cheek!_

Taking a deep breath, Ritsu attempted to dry the tears from his face, sniffling into his cotton sleeve. "I'm sorry," he gave Ayame a sheepish smile, slumping his shoulders and returning his attention to the play.

"No need to apologize!" Offering a reassuring grin, Ayame inched his fingers closer to the other man's face. Unable to stop himself, the snake brought one finger to the other man's cheek, gently catching a loose tear. 'You must stop being afraid of me,' the silver-haired man enjoyed the silky warmth of the other man's skin, heat racing through his veins at the contact. He dared to catch the monkey's hand in his grasp one more, this time smiling as the other man did not pull away. 'If you give me the chance, I will show you how much I truly regret the past. I will show you how much I love you.'

* * *

"Momiji-kun!" Ayame nearly squealed, bouncing toward the blonde boy with intense excitement in his eyes. Squeezing Ritsu's hand and leading the redhead along, he did his best to attract as much attention as possible from the other performers. "It was marvelous! An exquisite performance!"

"Ayame-san!" The smaller Sohma hurried to meet him, wrapping his arms around the snake as he beamed with happiness. "You came! What did you think? Wasn't it the best play ever? Wasn't it so much fun?"

"Oh yes, of course, little Bunny-kuns!" With a dramatic sweep of his wrist, the silver-haired man extracted a long-stem rose from his ornate bouquet. "This is for you!" He offered a dazzling grin, patting the other boy's hair affectionately. Spinning around, he caught Hatsuharu's attention and urged him forward. "And this is for you, Haru-kun! You gave a simply fantastic performance." Placing an identical blossom in the cow's hand, he chuckled. "The way you carried yourself onstage just reflected our deep similarities! Yes, you really are my cousin!"

"Ritchan!" Momiji suddenly took notice of Ayame's companion, smiling broadly. "You came, too? Did you have fun? It was really fun, wasn't it?"

"Y, y, yes," the monkey did his best to hide behind Ayame's dramatic form. "Hello Momiji-san. Hello Hatsuharu-san." He bowed, barely able to take his eyes off of the floor. "You did a good job."

"Thanks," Haru smiled politely, his voice sounding kind but indifferent. "Hey, I think Tohru and the others may still be backstage. I'm sure she'll want to see you."

"Oh yes, of course!" Waving his arms in a fluid motion, the snake's eyes twinkled eagerly. "Now tell me, is my dearest little brother back there with her? I really must go speak to him."

"Yes! Yes! He's there!" Momiji winked, tugging on Haru's arm as he nodded his head vigorously. "But now we have to go see Ha'ri-san and Shigure-san! Maybe we can visit you later. OK, Ayame-san and Ritsu-san?" Smelling his rose, he giggled. "_Danke schön_!"

Watching the two boys disappear into the crowds of people, Ayame ran his slender fingers down Ritsu's arm. "Won't you accompany me to Yuki-kun and I's emotional reunion?" He invited, grinning brightly at the other man as he headed toward the backstage area.

"Um, yes, Ayame-san, if you don't mind, that is!" The redhead's shoulders slumped forward as his blush deepened. "Thank you, Ayame-san."

"Oh, don't mention it at all!" Sweeping his hand through the air, he laughed. "Your company is always a pleasure for me!" Climbing over prop boxes and in between costume racks, the couple found themselves in a dimly-lit collection of small dressing rooms. "Well, this must be where our aspiring stars are hiding! Tohru-kun? Kyonkichi? _Mon frére_?" He sang at the top of his lungs, lavishing in the stares he attracted from the other students. "I've come to congratulate you!"

A girl emerged from behind a stack of boxes, her full-skirted costume dragging on the floor as she ran. "Ayame-san! Ritchan-san! I didn't know you were coming!" Her face danced with joy at the sight of the two cousins, and she blushed, laughing half-unexpectedly. "Wow, thank you so much!"

"It was my pleasure, as usual," the silver-haired man took her hand, casually placing a kiss on her fingers before plucking out another pink rose and offering it to her. "You were amazing! I never knew you were such an actress! You performed with such passion, such conviction. Now I see why my brother loves you so very much."

"No, no, I," she flushed, studying the flower in her hand. "I've never really performed before, I just thought it would be fun, and-."

"Well, to me you seemed virtually professional, and I am a connoisseur of the performing arts, of course." Distracted from his flattery by a series of loud noises behind him, he whirled around with a sparkling smile. "Oh, Kyonkichi!" He surveyed the orange-haired boy with an intense stare. "You mustn't sneak up on me that way! And after I went through all the trouble to bring you this present," he teased, chuckling as he forced a rose in the cat's hand.

"I don't want your stupid flower!" Kyo's eyes narrowed as he met the other man's eccentric words with a low growl. "What the hell are you doing here?" His gaze flew to the nervous monkey. "And why did you have to bring him?"

Ritsu clutched his chest, startled by the boy's angry words. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" His breathing accelerated as he began to pace around the room. "I shouldn't have come when I knew I was not welcomed! I shouldn't have taken up a seat that could've belonged to someone else just to selfishly watch your performance! I'm sorry!" He ran toward a number of other student actors, pleading to them in his panic. "I'M SO SORRY! I apologize to you! I apologize to the whole world!"

"Ritchan, Ritchan!" The snake caught the other man in his arms, chuckling with a carefree wave. "Ritsu and I even enjoyed your act, Kyonkichi," he turned his attention back to the orange-haired boy. "Yes, it was truly ironic when my little Yuki-kun killed you. It seems that even in plays he is bound to beat you somehow. Splendidly ironic!"

"Take that back, you damn snake!" Kyo yelled, rampaging toward the other man with a look of fury burning in his eyes. Shaking his fist at Ayame, he snarled. "I said, 'take it back'!"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Ritsu clutched onto Ayame's arm with shaking fingers, repeating his apology like a mantra.

"Kyonkichi, you really must calm down. You might tear your fabulous costume if you get in a fight!" The silver-haired man placed a warning hand on the younger boy's shoulder, exhaling emphatically.

"Stop calling me that stupid name!" Kyo insisted, glaring at the other man.

"Kyo-kun, calm down please!" Tohru begged him, her eyes filled with fear at the anger on his face. "Ayame-san and Ritchan-san just wanted to come congratulate you!"

"Yes, it seems Tohru is absolutely right," the snake added, wrapping his arm around Ritsu protectively. "In fact, I was just looking for Yuki-kun when you came and now-."

A voice interrupted Ayame's narrative. "Is something wrong, Miss Honda?" Yuki appeared at the door of a nearby dressing room. As he surveyed the scene, however, his polite tone dropped entirely. "What are you doing here, Ayame?" He sounded suspicious as he approached his brother.

"Oh, sweetest little brother!" Ayame's heart softened immediately at the sight of the younger boy. 'Here's my chance,' he thought hopefully. 'Now I can be the big brother I never was. I just need to prove to him that I want to be a part of his life. I just need to show him how proud of him I am.' The snake sashayed forward, attempting to wrap the other boy in his arms. "Oh, Yuki-kun! You were unspeakably perfect! You fit the role so well! I was simply charmed by your performance. It was moving! It was inspiring! It was-."

The rat remained frigid, tugging away from the snake as hatred flared through his expression. "What are you doing here?" He demanded. "I thought I told you-."

"But, Yuki-kun, you knew I could not bear to miss such a joyous occasion! I wanted to see you!" Trying the salvage the conversation, he presented the remaining bouquet to the smaller boy. "I humbly grant you these stunning flowers as a reward for such a superb drama! Ritchan and I just adored the piece. It was magnificent!"

"Don't you ever think of what I want?" Yuki shoved the flowers back into his brother's arms, losing his composure. "Everything is always about you. I told you I didn't want you to come tonight, but instead you just decided to bring Ritsu and parade around in front of my whole school, embarrassing me. You never cared about me before, why do you care so much now?"

Deep pain stung at Ayame's heart, and he took a forced breath to prevent the tears from spilling over in his eyes. Behind him, he heard Ritsu collapse to the floor with regretful sobs. 'Pretty Ritchan, don't cry,' he mentally reached out to the other man. His vision clouded, and in his chest he felt emptiness move in and darken his mood like a storm cloud on a sunny day. He struggled to regain his flamboyant smile. "But, dearest Yuki, I only thought to come and show you how strong our fraternal bond really is."

Rolling his eyes, the steely-haired boy turned to leave. "I'll be finished in just a moment, Miss Honda," his gentle façade returned as he attempted to console his friend. "And then perhaps we can talk to Shigure about the cast party?" Leaving the group, he brushed past his brother, reaching to open the dressing room door.

"Wait, Yuki-kun!" Ayame dashed forward, loathing the sensation of being ignored. "I really hoped that we might be able to talk some more this evening about our brotherhood. We really have so much catching up to do, and I thought it would be splendid if you might join Ritchan and I for a nice meal or-."

"Leave me alone, you faggot!" Yuki hissed under his breath, slamming the door in the silver-haired man's face.

Unable to believe the rat's words, Ayame sighed shakily. "Yuki?" He whispered, the bouquet slipping from his numb fingers and smashing on the floor.

* * *

**Francais Avec Ayame #5**

_mon frere_-my brother

and a little German from Momiji...

_Danke schon_- Thank you!

next chapter...some angst...sorry!


	6. Moonlit Tears

Hallo everyone! OK, I was planning on writing this story after I finished "Into Ashes All My Lust", but I just got inspired a few nights ago and had to start! I'm not sure how often I will update until I finish working on my other story, but after that updates will come much more frequently. Well, I know this is a very alternative pairing but I think it's really cute and hope everyone enjoys it! Please review!

* * *

'Leave me alone, you faggot,' the words pounded into Ayame's head like a drumbeat, sending pangs of misery racing through his veins. He was shocked. Completely astounded by the boy's criticism. 'Why? Yuki, I just want to build a relationship with you. Why won't you let me? Why are you acting just like our parents?' Feeling a sharp clench in his chest, he looked away, trying to regain his composure. "Yuki-kun!" He managed to croak out. "Don't be silly! I know you really want to come and enjoy an evening with your big brother!"

Approaching the snake timidly from behind, Ritsu placed a hand on the other man's arm. "Ayame-san, are you OK?" He whispered in a concerned voice, quickly regressing from the physical contact as he realized what he was doing. "I'm so sorry," he added hurriedly.

"It isn't your fault!" With a breath, Ayame mustered a sparkling laugh, dashing all the sorrow from his eyes. "My Yuki-kun is just simply overcome with emotion at the sight of me!" Ignoring Kyo's snickers, he turned back to the small group of onlookers with an emphatic sigh. "But one of these days he will realize how magnificent my company truly is!" Sliding his arm around Ritsu's waist, the snake rebuilt his arrogant façade. "But come now, dearest Ritchan! I must escort you home!"

"Oh no," Ritsu waved his arms around frantically, his face painted with a look of sheer panic. "You've already done so much for me today! I couldn't impose on you like that! I don't deserve it!"

"But I want to take you, sweet Monkey-kun, and I hope you will not refuse me," gesturing to the two actors with false happiness, he called out to them as he passed. "Farewell, Miss Tohru. Bye bye, Kyonkichi! Tell Yuki 'good bye' for me!"

"Bye Ayame-san," Tohru met him with a sincere grin. "Thank you so much for coming!"

"Oh, it was my pleasure!" Ayame chuckled at her politeness, bowing in an exaggerated motion. "We both really enjoyed it! It was simply superb!"

"Good bye, Tohru-san and Kyo-san," the monkey squeaked courteously, falling into a bow as they exited the stage.

* * *

Watching the pavement rush underneath him, Ayame sighed inwardly, trying to revive his cheerful spirit. But Yuki's words left him disquieted and depressed, the memories hanging heavily in his chest. 'I was a fool back then, wasn't I? I had but one opportunity to have a brother, and I lost it! I can never get it back!' Turning to his companion and noticing the way the streetlights played on his features, the snake felt his stomach jolt. 'I had my chance with Ritsu, too. But that, too, became a victim of my childhood ignorance! Now that I fully understand how fabulous he is, it is far too late. He's afraid of me, and I might not be able to do anything about it!'

The only feeling Ayame hated worse than being ignored was helplessness. As a child, he had always been able to catch the intrigue of the people around him and charm them into adoring his every word. Then, he felt capable of accomplishing anything. 'But things started to change. I realized that I couldn't do everything alone. And when I saw that, I knew I lacked the love of those people I really needed.' Sighing painfully, he swept his fingers through his hair, slowing his pace.

Ritsu stopped, stealing a meek glance in the taller Sohma's direction. "Is something wrong, Ayame-san?" He appeared terrified by the other man's actions, his eyes anxiously scanning the snake's face for any sign of discomfort. "If you don't want to walk anymore, that's OK! I'm so sorry for imposing on you like this!"

"No, no!" The silver-haired man assured him, regaining some of his vivacity in hopes of consoling the cross dresser. "Of course not, sweet Ritchan! I simply adore your company! I could not bare to have you walking all alone at this time of night. I would just die of misery if something happened to you!" Listening to his over-enthusiastic reply as it echoed down the deserted street, he shrugged his shoulders, replying, "I was only thinking to myself. It was nothing concerning you, of course."

Ritsu looked uncomfortable, ringing his hands as he stared at his feet with bittersweet fascination. "Ayame-san, I," his words faltered as his shoulders fell forward in embarrassment, "well, I, I just, um, I'm so sorry about what Yuki said to you." He bit his lip, trying to suppress the apparent tears that gathered in the corners of his eyes. He chanced a peek at Ayame, trying in vain to gauge his response. "I'm sorry, please excuse me. I shouldn't have mentioned it!"

"Oh no, sweet Monkey-kun!" Despite his surprise at the younger man's bold comment, he wrapped an assuring arm around the redhead's shoulders. "It is magnificent of you to be concerned about me. Positively lovely!" Feeling a tingling sensation rush through his veins at the contact with Ritsu's body, he enjoyed the other man's warmth, cherishing it. 'Ritchan, you are truly amazing! I just want you to know how much I care about you. Even if I didn't always act like it, I see now that I've loved you all along. Please let me show you.' Waving his other arm with a dazzling 'swish', he offered the monkey his most enchanting smile. "Of course I know that Yuki really did not mean it!" He lied.

The redhead bit his lip, tugging away and quickening his pace slightly so as to break stride with the other man. "It's just that, well, I, um," quivering, his blush deepened until it seemed to glow in the pale moonlight, "I, I, I hate it what people call me that _word_." He forced out his statement in one breath before inhaling deeply, looking horrified by his own shamelessness. "Oh, I mean, it's nothing, I just, I didn't want you to be sad."

A weight seemed to fall in the snake's chest, causing him to feel dizzy with astonishment. 'He's been called that dreadful name, as well?' Ayame gasped dramatically, his hands flying to his mouth. "Who calls you that, my little Ritchan? They certainly cannot mean it!"

"I'm sorry, please forget I said it," he bowed in response, speeding up once more as he fought to catch his breath. "I really shouldn't be imposing on you like this. You don't want to hear about my problems, I mean, I just couldn't-."

"Silly Monkey-kun!" Ayame stretched out his willowy arms, catching the other man in a suffocating embrace. "You aren't imposing on me at all! Sometimes the very best way of solving a problem is to talk about it! I, of course, do just that whenever I am bothered by something!" Remembering his unwillingness to open up about his troubles with Yuki, he mentally added, 'Well, almost always.' Smiling, he released his grip on the redhead, gazing into his eyes with a look of seriousness. "You know that you can always talk to me about anything! I give the most splendid advice!"

"I know, I just," Ritsu's voice was much quieter as he responded to the silver-haired man's boasts. "I, well, I don't think I should." He trailed off, meeting his companion's stare with a teary blush. Sighing, he conceded. "People used to call me _that_ in school," he opened up, hiding his face in his hands. "But it's OK now because I'm older and it doesn't really bother me. I'm so sorry for mentioning it!"

Extending his fingers to soothe the trembling monkey, Ayame lightly caressed his cousin's hair. "Oh, Ritchan! It's OK! I understand your feelings entirely!" He attempted to keep his flamboyant tone, but it cracked tragically, dissolving as a flood of memories overpowered him. "When I was younger, my parents decided that I was not behaving as they saw fit for a boy. Whenever I was with them, I was terrified to speak or act because they always accused me and insulted me." Looking away, the silver-haired man bit his lip, trying to find the strength to keep up his façade.

Ayame's chest heaved as he suppressed the sob that climbed up his throat. "It was something completely new to me. I was so accustomed to being accepted and even idolized by the people around me. Everywhere I went, people told me how wonderful I was. So when my parents criticized me, I was shocked. I had never dreamed that anyone could be embarrassed by me or want to change me." Losing control, one sparkling tear danced from the snake's green eye as all the rejection of his past haunted him once more. It seemed as if it was happening again, hurting him again, and he hated it. "I just simply could not believe it."

Wiping his eyes tentatively, he took a deep breath and continued, "My father was the worst. He always used to tell me how shameful I was. I knew I could never be the son he had dreamed of having, and it was horrible." Choking on his tears, the snake broke down, resting his head on the other man's shoulder. "He told me that he hated everything about me, and for the first time in my life, I felt like a failure. It was such a shock to me, because I'd lived a life of self-adoration for so long. But it is miserable knowing that nothing I achieve in life will ever be good enough for him. He'll never share my happiness."

"I'm sorry," Ritsu cried, meekly accepting the other man's touch as he let one arm slide lightly around Ayame's waist. "I'm so sorry. But you, you, you're so good at everything!"

Ayame's heartbeat quickened as he felt the smaller man responding to his caresses. Sighing quietly, he embraced him once again, this time smiling as he felt no resistance. "But I did not fit his ideal. I was too different, perhaps. When Yuki was born, the taunting stopped. But to them, I became invisible. They shut me out of their lives, and I happily turned away from them and found other sources of attention. I filled my life with pleasure and excitement, and sometimes I even forgot their cruel words."

"But tonight, hearing Yuki talk like that, it just seemed like they had returned to me, screaming at me and trying to beat me into submission once again. I just keep sustaining myself on the hope that he is making a mistake, that he does not mean what he says, but I'm starting to doubt my own lies."

The redhead bit his lip, shifting awkwardly as he seemed to be struggling for words. "I'm sorry," he repeated his mantra, however, this time his voice was filled with more than panic and distress. It was filled with empathy. A complete understanding of the other man's pain. "But Yuki loves you! Everyone loves you! You're so talented, and funny, and you have so many friends. Your family must be proud of you for that."

"I cannot understand it myself," Ayame shook his head, clearing the tears from his eyes as he plastered another shining grin on his face. 'He really feels that way about me?' He was flattered by the other man's adoration, pleased by the attention from his new crush. "I am an accomplished individual, yes, but I've also made a few mistakes in my life. I mistreated Yuki, so I suppose I might not deserve to have his love. But that does not make it hurt any less, of course."

Nodding his head, the monkey let his body relax slightly against the taller form. "Maybe, maybe, well, you could apologize to Yuki. I think he might forgive you if he knew that you are sorry. I, I, I mean, it happened so long ago-."

"So it is possible," Ayame's pulse quickened unexpectedly at the other man's advice, "to forgive someone who senselessly broke your heart for their own enjoyment? That isn't too hideous a crime to be forgotten?" Studying the redhead's delicate features, he sighed, bringing one finger to wipe a tear from his cousin's cheek. 'Would it be possible for you to forgive me for what I did to you? Would it be so easy, just because it happened long ago? Oh Ritchan, I am so sorry. My guilt follows me day and night. Please forgive me.'

"Y, y, yes, I mean, I think so," the smaller man looked confused, staring with unfocused eyes at some point behind Ayame's head. "I mean, well, I would. But I don't know for sure about Yuki! I'm sorry for saying things I don't really understand! I'm so stupid!"

"I was not referring to my issues with Yuki-kun, my dearest Ritchan," the snake corrected him, cupping the redhead's cheek and forcing him to meet his gaze. 'Beautiful.' His smile softened as fondness for the monkey swelled in his chest. Taking a deep breath, he assembled his apology. "You must still remember that dreadful day when we were children. You brought me a cherry blossom flower, remember? And I so thoughtlessly laughed at you with Gure-kun. I was so selfish. I did not even think about how my attitude might make you feel. But I know now that I was wrong. Will you please forgive me?"

Recollection instantly dawned on the other man's face. "Oh, no, it's OK! You shouldn't worry about hurting me! I deserved it!" Pulling away from the embrace, Ritsu looked away, beginning to walk once more as he avoided Ayame's gaze. "That was such an ugly present! I'm sorry."

"It was a lovely gift, sweet Monkey-kun!" Ayame felt bereft of Ritsu's touch, sashaying forward in a desperate attempt to regain the redhead's attention. "I was just too foolish to realize that at the time. When we are young, we are often blind to true beauty!" He caught the smaller man, wrenching him back into his arms as he stopped him in his tracks. Pressing his body against Ritsu's back, he sighed, basking in the other man's warmth. "Little Ritchan, I hurt you, and I was wrong to do it. Do you forgive me?"

"I, I," turning around, Ritsu offered a shy smile. His eyes glowed with both appreciation and disbelief, glistening with fresh tears as they surveyed the silver-haired man. "I forgive you. I forgave you a long time ago." His whisper seemed to disappear into the night air, and he blushed. Yanking away from Ayame, he ran down the street toward the Sohma main house, leaving his companion to chase after him.

"Ritchan!" The snake rushed to bring him back. "Oh, little Ritchan! Come back here! Stop being silly!" Chuckling, he slowed to catch his breath.

"I'm, I'm sorry," the redhead called in response. "I'M SO SORRY! I SHOULDN'T HAVE BOTHERED YOU LIKE THAT!"

"Sweet Ritsu, you are going to wake up the whole town!" He felt amused as he heard the other man's screams echoing off the trees and houses. "And I expect to see you sometime soon. I'm taking you to dinner tomorrow night, and don't you even try to refuse me!"

Receiving no response, the snake halted, watching the smaller man's retreating form as it disappeared into the gated courtyard of the Sohma estate. 'He forgives me!' The memory of the redhead's words caused his heart to melt. 'Dear Ritsu,' he sighed passionately, recalling each moment spent with the other man in a rush of infatuation. The way he moved. The way he smiled. The way he cared for others. Even his desperate apologies. 'Being with him is exciting and comforting. He's so different than me, thinking through every statement so as not to offend anyone else. I admire that, and I love him for it. Even if my parents ignore me, and even if Yuki rejects me for the rest of my life, if I can have Ritsu's love, I will be satisfied.'

* * *

No language lesson this chapter! Amazing!

Next chapter...Ayame and Ritsu's big date. ha ha!


	7. Glass Shards

Well, everyone...I've finished the next chapter sooner than anticipated:) Imagine that. This one is set in a steakhouse...lol, which is really funny considering I'm a vegetarian. But steak is the most expensive food in Japan...and you know how our little Aaya-san loves to show off! ;) They also drink wine, and I don't drink, so, yeah...this is just full of little ironic touches. ha ha! Enjoy and review!

* * *

"Yes, I have a reservation for two," Ayame beamed at the tuxedo-clad _maitre d'_, looking proud as he wrapped his arm around Ritsu's waist. "The name is Sohma Ayame."

The man shifted through an embossed book, eyeing the two men curiously. "Yes, yes, of course, sir," he nodded, maintaining an air of politeness despite his obvious disapproval of his guests. He studied the snake's silver braid and outlandish purple dress coat, sniffing his nose slightly as he turned to leave. "Right this way."

"Isn't this a charming place, Ritchan?" The taller man guided his date into the main room, strutting behind the _maitre d' _with a look of satisfaction in his eyes. "Simply fabulous! When I thought to bring you somewhere, I just knew it had to be here. Little Monkey-chan deserves only the best!"

"I, I, I'm sorry, I'm not good enough for this," the redhead was awestruck as he scanned the elegant Western-style steakhouse. Fixing his gaze on the rich burgundy carpet, he blushed deeply, fidgeting with the silk of his green dress. "I mean, thank you. Thank you so much, Ayame-san."

The silver-haired man's heart fluttered as he noted the change in Ritsu's statements. 'What is going on? Is he trying to keep his composure?' He was overjoyed by the other man's attempt at confidence, which only further propelled his excitement. "Here you go, my dearest Ritsu," approaching a candle-lit table, he dramatically pulled out a chair, taking the monkey's hand and easing him into it. "Please have a seat," he bowed, flashing a sparkling grin.

"Enjoy your meal, sir," the host sounded suspicious as he studied Ritsu, "and madam." Handing Ayame the menus, he offered a fake smile before returning to his post at the front of the restaurant.

"Ah, yes!" Taking the seat across from the monkey, the silver-haired man began to finger through the menu. He paused, studying each foreign word, struggling to retain some of his vocabulary from high school language classes. "I think I will order a bottle of _Pinot Noir_," he mustered an exaggerated accent, moving his arms to match his enthusiasm. "If that suits you, of course."

"Y, y, yes, of course," the redhead shifted in his seat, looking unsure about what he had agreed to drink. Opening his own menu, he earnestly examined the list for something resembling the word that the other man had just proposed. "Oh, um!" He stopped suddenly, his eyes widening. Grabbing for his tiny purse and pulling it into his lap, he started to rummage through each pocket with a fearful look on his face. "I'm not sure I can, I mean, um," he bit his lip, unable to meet the other man's gaze.

Leaning across the table, Ayame caught Ritsu's hand. "Not to worry, my dearest little Ritchan. I invited you on this date, and I will certainly not make you pay for any of it!" Easing the bag out of the redhead's grip, he offered a reassuring smile. "The most important thing is that you enjoy yourself! Now," he scanned the list of foods once more, gaining momentum as he tried to impress his date. "The _filet mignon _is simply fabulous. I order it every time!" He nodded to reaffirm his lie.

"I don't know, um," Ritsu flushed, ringing his hands under the table. "I don't think I'm worth that."

"Nonsense!" The snake chuckled vivaciously, throwing his hand in the air to signal the waiter. "_Excusez-moi, garçon_!" He paused, waiting for the tuxedo-clad man to respond. "Could you bring my friend and I a bottle of _Pinot Noir_, on ice?"

"Of course, sir," the older man bowed, backing away and heading for the kitchen. "Whatever you desire."

Ignoring the prying stares being shot in his direction from the surrounding tables, Ayame fingered his braided hair, grinning at his companion expectantly. "So, Ritchan," he attempted to prompt a conversation, "how is your painting coming along? I would just love to see it!"

"Well," the younger man fiddled with his napkin, trembling slightly as he tried to produce a response. "I, um, I restarted that painting of the gardens. It was ugly, and I didn't want my teacher to be ashamed of me, so I have to keep trying to make it better."

"I thought it was quite lovely," Ayame corrected him, offering the other man an encouraging look. "I'm sure your teacher would've been very pleased with it! You are never going to get anywhere in life if you always worry about not being perfect."

"I know I'm not perfect!" The smaller man's voice rose slightly as his shoulders slumped forward. "I'm sorry, Ayame-san. I should've kept trying."

"Yes, yes, that's a much better attitude!" Laughing, the dress designer placed a finger under Ritsu's chin, gently forcing the redhead to make eye contact with him. Ignoring the awkward blush on the monkey's face, he continued. "Now tell me, do you always paint landscapes, or have you also experimented with other subjects? People, perhaps?"

"No, no," the redhead pulled away from the snake's touch. "I never paint people. I'm, I'm just afraid they won't like my work, and they'll get mad at me, and," he took a deep breath, calming his voice slightly. "Once I went to the zoo and painted a family of monkeys, but I was a little nervous and I don't think it turned out very well. I mostly like doing landscapes because, well, the trees can't get angry when I don't do a very good job." He giggled uneasily, hiding his mouth in his hands.

Ayame's heart leaped at the sound of the other man's laughter. "You're giggling, dear Monkey-chan! I never thought I would hear that!" Beaming at his companion, he relished in the smile on the other man's face, enjoying every moment of it. 'He truly looks happy. I seem to have helped him relax! How magnificent!'

Looking to the taller man, Ritsu misunderstood Ayame's comment. "Oh, I'm sorry!" His face muscles tensed into a look of frantic, completely erasing any signs of pleasure. "I'm so sorry! I was bothering you!"

"Oh Ritchan, of course you weren't! You look very lovely when you smile like that," as Ayame watched his date, his pulse quickened, his mind formulating an idea to persuade the young artist. "You know, sometime I would adore it if you would paint a portrait of me."

"Oh no! I couldn't!" Ritsu hurried to turn down the other man's request. "I'm sorry, I just-."

"Excuse me," the waiter interrupted their conversation. "One bottle of _Pinot Noir_, on ice." He gracefully placed the silver bucket on the table, uncorking the wine and pouring each man a glass. "Enjoy."

"Yes, we will, thank you," Ayame lifted the glass to his lips and sipped delicately at the dark liquid. Eyeing the younger man, he snickered playfully as he noted the apprehensive look on Ritsu's face. "You have never had a drink before, I gather."

"I, I," the monkey shook with embarrassment. "No, my mom wouldn't let me. But I will if _you_ want me to, Ayame-san," his face swelled with adoration as he chanced a glance in the snake's direction.

"Not to worry, sweet Ritchan," he handed the wine glass to his smaller cousin. "Just take it slow." He leaned back in his chair, watching the monkey take a shy sip of the alcohol. 'Hopefully that will ease some of his tension. It would be so nice to finally see the real Ritsu,' the snake wondered at the other man, silently praying that he would find an opportunity to share his feelings. 'He must know that I love him. He seems to have a bit of a crush on me, as well, so if he calms down a bit I may be able to talk to him about a possible relationship.'

Returning to the cousins' table, the elderly waiter bowed slightly as he extracted a pad of paper from his apron. "And what will you be eating today, sir?"

Ayame responded in a confident voice, gesturing fluidly as he spoke. "Yes, I will have a _filet mignon_, rare, with a side of hollandaise sauce."

"Very good choice," the older man agreed, scribbling down the order. "And for you, madam," he looked to Ritsu with expectant eyes.

"Oh, I, um," the redhead's voice fell to a whisper as he fingered the menu. "I guess I'll just have a salad-."

"He'll have the _filet mignon_, as well," Ayame interrupted, his own reply drowning out the monkey's half-hearted request. "And add a lobster tail with melted butter as a side dish."

"Very good, sir," the server flashed Ritsu an inquisitive stare, obviously confused by the snake's specification of gender. "I'll, I'll get that right out as soon as possible," he turned to leave, trying to mask his obvious smirk.

"Well," taking a long swig of wine, Ayame reached to pour himself another glass. Wishing to break the silence, he racked his brain for something to talk about. "My shop is doing amazing this week! We've sold nearly twice as much as usual. It seems that I am gaining a great deal of renown for my work, which is not surprising, of course."

Listening to the other man's boasts, the redhead nodded timidly. "That's because you're so good, Ayame-san," he agreed, his voice filled with sincerity.

"Yes, yes," the snake chuckled, his reply giving way to silence. 'I must give him something to talk about,' he grew slightly frustrated by the other man's short answer. 'I have to find a way to get him to open up to me. I need to find the real Ritsu before I can honestly tell him that I'm in love.' Sweeping his hair over his shoulder, he took a second try, "Did you hear that Ha'ri has a new girlfriend? She is a friend of Kana's, and she dated Shigure when we were younger. I've only met her a few times, but I hear she is also my dearest little brother's teacher in school. Isn't that wonderful?"

The younger man's eyes widened. "But Ayame-san," his voice squeaked. "Don't you like Hatori-san?" As soon as he had uttered the question, he clamped his hands over his mouth, a look of terror striking his pretty features. "I'm so sorry, Ayame-san. I, I," he stuttered, "I shouldn't have said anything. That was very rude of me!"

"So you knew, as well?" The snake ignored his companion's protests, sliding one of his legs against Ritsu's with an affirming grin. "I suppose everybody could see it. But that was when I was younger. I soon realized that, no matter how hard I tried, Hatori would never return my feelings. So I gave up on him."

"I'm so sorry," the monkey fumbled with his glass, blushing as he attempted to comfort the other man. "I'm really sorry."

"Nothing to worry about!" Ayame gave a carefree laugh, waving his hand through the air. "Really! I have forgotten about it entirely! I'm not one to mope! Besides," his voice dropped, gaining an air of seriousness, "I've found someone new that I'm interested in." Making eye contact with the redhead, his eyes softened meaningfully. "I think you know who I'm talking about. Don't you, beautiful Monkey-chan?"

"Oh! I, um," Ritsu stammered, flushing madly as he reached for his wine. "No, I'm sorry, I don't, um, well, I-." His hands trembled violently as tried to close around the neck of the glass. But instead, it slipped from his fingers, shattering on the ground and sending a spray of blood-colored liquid across the carpet. He gasped, looking mortified. "I'm sorry!" He dropped to his knees, frantically attempting to blot out the stain with his napkin. "I'm so sorry, Ayame-san! You shouldn't have brought me to a place like this! I'm too clumsy!"

"Oh, don't worry, Ritchan," joining his cousin on the floor, Ayame desperately tried to soothe the other man, wrapping his arms around his waist in hopes of stopping the impending fit of apologies. Looking up at the other tables, he noted the disapproving stares being shot at them from all directions. "It's really no trouble at all," he laughed, making an effort to curb the younger man's panic.

"I'm sorry!" Ritsu, however, ignored his older cousin's words, caught up in his own terror. "I'M SO SORRY! I APOLOGIZE!" He broke down in sobs, letting out echoing screams in an attempt to gain atonement. "I APOLOGIZE TO THE WHOLE WORLD! I SHOULD HAVE NEVER BEEN BORN! I'M SO STUPID! I MESS UP EVERYTHING I DO! I SHOULD JUST DIE!"

"No, no, of course not, Ritchan," Ayame ran his fingers through the monkey's hair, trying to pull him back to his seat. "Now let's not make a scene. It really isn't worth it. The waiter can come over and clean this up."

"Excuse me, sir," the _maitre d' _tapped on Ayame's shoulder, a look of suppressed annoyance filling his eyes. "If you don't get her to stop this, I'm going to have to ask you to leave. You're disturbing the other guests."

"Yes, yes, I know," the silver-haired man brushed him off, returning his attention to the weeping form in front of him. "Now, Ritsu, just come with me and-."

"I'M SO SORRY AYAME-SAN! NOW I'M JUST EMBARRASSING YOU!" Meeting his cousin's gaze, he cowered, crumbling under the fear of rejection. "I SHAME THE ENTIRE FAMILY! I'M SO SORRY! I JUST-!"

The snake's chest clenched as he sensed the self-loathing on his cousin's face. It was the same expression that he had seen that day when they were children, and it was very painful to know that he was, once again, the cause of his cousin's suffering. "No, no, you aren't embarrassing me at all. I don't get embarrassed," he bit his lip, searching his brain for some solution to the predicament. 'I must get him to stop. But how? I cannot hurt him anymore by telling him he needs to be quiet. I simply cannot stand to see him crying like this any longer!' His eyes suddenly fell to the other man's quivering lips, and he started to lean forward, losing all conception of reason. Silencing Ritsu's screams, he claimed the other man's mouth in a desperate kiss.

In Ayame's mind, time seemed to stop. Feeling the other man's lips against his own, he sighed, enjoying the tingling sensations that radiated from their point of contact. "Hmm, Ritchan," he melted into the redhead's meek hug, wrapping his cousin in a passionate embrace. "Ritchan, I," he whispered into the kiss, flicking his tongue against the other man's soft lips, tasting salty tears. "I-."

Ripping away from Ayame's embrace, the monkey stumbled to his feet, his chest heaving as he attempted to catch his breath. "Ayame-san," his eyes looked both hopeful and horrified, as if expecting the other man to laugh and tell him that the kiss had been just a joke. When his cousin failed to respond, Ritsu's voice became even more panicky. "I'M SO SORRY! I'VE RUINED EVERYTHING! I-." Running toward the exit, he bumped into tables and chairs as he hurried to get away. "I'M SO SORRY!"

Staring at his cousin's retreating form, the silver-haired man sighed. As he gathered the broken shards of glass in the palm of his hand, he chuckled, trying to hide his hurt as he met the onlookers' curious eyes. "Well, I suppose I will have to cancel one of those orders." Sinking into his seat, he closed his eyes, biting his lip in an attempt to block out the memory of the painful kiss. 'What did I do wrong?'

* * *

'I should've went after him,' drudging up the stairs, Ayame wrenched open his apartment door, sighing as he was greeted by the familiarity of his kitchen. 'I shouldn't have let him get away like that. He's really important to me, but somehow he keeps slipping passed whenever I get close to telling him. I was so close. I really was!' 

Shoving the leftover steak into the refrigerator, the snake pulled out his braid haphazardly. He glanced over to the phone, the blinking message light catching his eyes. 'Ritsu?' He anticipated as he pressed the button, preparing for a string of frantic apologies.

"I'm so sorry, Ayame-san. I ruined everything!" The voice cracked from within the answering machine, echoing with hollow fear and regret. "I really didn't deserve such a nice dinner, but you were gracious to me and took me out anyways, and I ruined it! I'm so sorry! I'M SORRY! I DON'T DESERVE TO BE AROUND YOU! I'M SOR-."

Beep. Ayame pushed the button once more, cutting off his cousin. He just couldn't stand to hear the monkey cry any longer. 'Ritsu, you were so wonderful tonight. You really were trying to contain yourself, but somehow you lost it. I really want to see that Ritsu again, the calm Ritsu who laughs and smiles and makes mistakes without collapsing in regret.'

An image of the redhead flashed through the snake's mind. He remembered Ritsu, crying, crumpled on the floor and begging for his forgiveness. "It's OK, Ritchan. I forgive you. I forgave you a long time ago," he mimicked the younger man's words as he smiled at a reflection of himself on the kitchen table. 'I know that change is as difficult for you as it is for me. But we can do it together, sweet Ritchan, because I love you and I will not lose you again.'

Sinking into a chair, he smiled, letting the memories of their kiss warm his heart. 'I will not lose you.'

* * *

**Francais avec Ayame #7 **(it's a long one!) 

_Maitre d'- _short for "maitre d'hotel", it is the head waiter or host at a restaurant.

_Pinot Noir_- an expensive red wine from France. I believe it translates to "black pines"...but I may be wrong. It's just the name of the vineyard.

_Filet mignon_- yup, I bet everyone knows this one, even little vegetarian me! It is a cut of steak, that literally translates to "little cut of meat"

_Excusez-moi_- excuse me

_Garcon-_ it means "boy"...however it is often used in American movies as a title given to French waiters. It is actually very impolite, though. Aaya must not know that!

ha ha...well, most of those were words related to food and servers at expensive French restaurants...it makes me want to go to France and eat steak. Lol, just kidding, just kidding...well, I would like to be in France but I could live without the steak. God, it's late and I'm tired! Sorry about that! ;)

Next chapter, major angst, sorry!


	8. Nighttime Silence

Ok! Well, I'm on the countdown...just about three weeks before I move into college! yay! I'm trying to finish this story before I go, so expect frequent updates! Hopefully the same thing that happens to Ritsu in this chapter doesn't happen to me! (...I'm not giving it away yet, though! You'll just have to keep reading!) Well, I don't think it will! I hope everyone enjoys this chapter, even though it's sad! Please read and review!

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Ring. Ring. Fumbling through the darkness, Ayame stretched half-heartedly for the cell phone. 'Who could be calling at this time of night?' He wondered, barely discerning the glowing numbers on the clock with his bleary eyes. 1:30. Ring. Ring. 'Dammit!' He grumbled as he accidentally knocked over a bottle of nail polish, biting his lip as he heard it roll across the floor.

His fingers finally closed around the ringing appliance. "Hello?" He questioned into the mouthpiece, attempting a cheery tone. "Sohma Ayame speaking."

"Aaya," Hatori's voice came in a solemn whisper. "I need you to come to the Main House." As his request echoed through the phone's earpiece, it became businesslike and almost lifeless.

"Ha'ri, do you have any idea what time it is? I know that my company is so addicting, but could you at least wait until morning?" Laughing awkwardly, the snake tried to disregard the subtle tremble in his friend's speech, pretending that he did not realize the call was in regards to something very serious. But curiosity took over, and he dropped his façade. "It's Akito, isn't it?" He quieted his voice, faking concern for the family leader.

Hatori paused, taking a deep breath. "No, it isn't Akito," he explained in a strained tone. "It's Ritsu."

"Ritsu?" The silver-haired man squeaked, jumping out of bed and running to his closet. As his pulse quickened, he felt a sinking feeling swell in his chest. 'Ritsu? But, what's wrong? Is he sick? No, I saw him a few days ago and he was fine. He just has to be fine.' Mustering some hope, he managed to calm himself as he searched for a suitable outfit. "Is little Ritchan asking for me?" He giggled, suppressing his nervousness.

"Aaya, Ritsu attempted suicide a few hours ago. He overdosed on his depression medication," Hatori interrupted the other man, cutting short his playful laughter. "He's stable, but very distraught. I think it might help him if you stay here tonight."

The snake felt a stab of pain in his heart. 'Suicide?' Closing his eyes, Ayame tried to block out the flood of questions rushing through his mind. 'But, suicide? How could he want to die? Doesn't he realize that I want him to be alive! Why-?' The phone started to slip through his numb fingers, and he clamped his other hand around his mouth to cut off his impending sobs. "But, why?" His words were halted as they forced their way through the lump in his throat.

Hatori's voice softened as he recognized his friend's tears, "I don't know what going on between you and him, but this wasn't your fault, Aaya." Obviously trying to comfort the other man, his tone became careful and concerned. "He found out yesterday that he's being expelled from college."

"Expelled?" The snake gasped, stumbling backwards in surprise. An image of his younger cousin, bent over a canvas with an engrossed look in his eyes, stained his memory. The painting was beautiful. Ritsu had so much talent. "No, that can't be!" He insisted, hiding his face in his hands. "Suicide? Did, did Ritsu want to die because of that? Did he think that that's all his life is worth?" Ayame's words became incoherent as he slipped on his overcoat and hurried to the door. "No! He couldn't. He just couldn't want to die. I need him, Ha'ri."

* * *

The echo of Ayame's feet on the wooden floor of the Sohma residence sounded hollow in the nighttime silence. Thud. Thud. 'Suicide?' Another flash of pain attacked him as he approached the makeshift hospital. 'He could've died tonight!' The realization stunned the silver-haired man, and he clenched his fists to keep from crying once more. The thought of living without Ritsu seemed impossible now. 'Even though I hardly noticed him a few weeks ago, now I know how much I need to be with him. He's really special. I can't believe I almost lost him tonight. I would have never gotten the chance to tell him how much I'm in love.' 

Pausing at the familiar door to Hatori's office, he took a deep breath before entering. He was afraid, because he knew he would see the man he loved in pain, and he did not quite know how he should react. 'I'm really bad with these things,' he reminded himself sheepishly, remembering his many failed attempts at helping his brother. 'But I just have to let Ritsu know how important he is. I need to show him how I feel.'

Stepping over the thresh hold, Ayame shivered at the eerie scene before him. He saw Hatori bustling around the room in a stark white coat while Ritsu's mother stared downwards with an empty look in her eyes. As the frail woman leaned over the bed, she seemed to form the words "I'm sorry" with her waning lips. However, Ayame heard nothing.

From the corner, Akito watched with a slightly smug look on his face, becoming the first to take note of the silver-haired man's presence. "Well, well, snake," the family leader snickered, appearing completely insensitive to his traumatized companions. "Have you decided to join in on the fun?"

Disregarding the god's callousness, Ayame hurried towards the bed, catching sight of the redhead's form under a pile of blankets. "Little Ritchan?" He was surprised at the weakness of his own voice, coughing to cover up the wounded crack in his words. Rushing to the other man, he knelt at the bedside, his blood growing frigid as he studied his cousin.

"Ayame-san?" Ritsu whispered shakily, lifting a pale hand to his face. The moonlight cascading from a nearby window seemed to make his skin almost translucent, giving him an ethereal glow. His eyes were concave and removed, only slightly reflecting emotion as he turned away from the older man's gaze. "Please don't look at me, Ayame-san," he shivered with self-pity, hiding behind a mass of disheveled hair. "I'm not worth your time."

"Oh, Ritchan! Don't say such silly things!" Plastering an assured smile on his face, he tried to conceal how shocked he was by the other man's tragic appearance. The monkey was like a ghost to Ayame: icy, emotionless, and pallid, and the snake had to struggle to keep his stomach from churning. 'He looks like he's already dead,' grimacing internally, the silver-haired man wiped a tear from his cheek before burying his fingers in the other man's tresses. "Why did you do this to yourself, my sweet Ritsu?"

"Be, be, because," stuttering, the younger Sohma fought to catch his breath, "I'm such a nuisance to everyone around me. I fail at everything I do. I'm just, I'm just," he dissolved into a fit of tears, "worthless."

Interrupting the men's conversation, Ritsu's mother reached a timid hand to comfort her son. "Shh, Shh," she ran her bony fingers down the cross dresser's arm, looking to Ayame with a worried expression on her face. "Don't cry. Don't bother Ayame-san with your problems." Meeting the silver-haired man's stare, she quickly added, "I'm sorry about all of this. I'm so sorry."

"Not to worry! No need to apologize to me," the snake rushed to correct her, taken aback by the woman's self-conscious attitude even in spite of Ritsu's condition. "I'm sorry this happened to you and your son. I was just so stunned when I found out! I was simply horrified that my Ritchan would try to take his life," returning his attention to the bedridden monkey, Ayame's voice became silky, "You know how much I care about you."

Stammering, Ritsu looked to his mother with a lightless blush, "I, I-."

Stepping forward, Hatori helped the worried woman to her feet. "I think it might be best if we let Ayame have some time alone with Ritsu," glancing at the family leader, he added, "You too, Akito-san. You need to get some sleep or you'll be ill in the morning," leaving no room for protest, he nodded knowingly in his flamboyant friend's direction before leading the two reluctant onlookers toward the door. "I'll be back to check on him in a few minutes."

As Ayame watched the retreating silhouettes, he was struck by Ritsu's mother's fragility. 'She looks so old. So ill,' he realized with fleeting inquisitiveness as he returned to the redhead's side. "Oh, Ritchan, do you know how much you worried me?"

"I'm sorry!" Gasping with panic, the monkey buried his face in his blanket. "I just didn't want to bother you anymore. I've failed at everything in life. It's over. My existence only troubles the people around me. I'm so sorry!"

'Ritchan, please stop crying!' Ayame silently pleaded, pulling the other man into a forced embrace. 'You aren't a failure. What can I say to convince you that you are important?' He ran his fingers down Ritsu's shivering spine, biting his lip in an attempt to remain strong. "You must calm down or you'll hurt yourself even worse. Just relax, dear Monkey-chan."

"I don't care if I hurt myself. I, I just want to die," Struggling in vain against the snake's touch, he finally succumbed, falling numb in the other man's arms. "Please leave, Ayame-san. I'm bothering you. I'm so sorry. I've ruined your life already."

'Does he really think so lowly of himself? How could anyone feel that way? No matter how many mistakes I make, I still value my life. How could he feel self-loathing when he is such an amazing individual?' Holding back tears as he listened to the younger man's angst, Ayame stared at the redhead in disbelief. "You haven't ruined my life, Ritsu! Why would you even think such a thing?"

"Because I embarrass you all the time!" Cringing, the cross dresser's eyes swelled with depression. "You do such nice things for me, and I try to be nice to you, too, but I always make mistakes! I'm just so stupid! I embarrassed you in front of all our cousins when we were children, and then I embarrassed you at the play, and at the restaurant. I don't deserve to be cared for by anyone! My existence is shameful!"

"We all make mistakes, Ritchan. I've even made a few myself, and I'll regret them for the rest of my life," Brushing a stray lock of silver hair from his face, Ayame continued quietly. "I've hurt you, and my brother, and I've disgraced my parents. But that doesn't mean I want to stop living. I can't correct my mistakes if I'm dead, now can I?"

"But it's different for you!" Ritsu insisted with a rare burst of assertiveness. "You're so good at everything you do, and everyone loves you. If you died tonight, the entire family would go into mourning, but if I vanished, no one would really care." He dissolved into sobs, his lips trembling violently. "I'm just a burden."

"_I _would care if you died, Ritchan! I need you! I love being with you! Do you think I would spend so much time with someone who bothered me?" Attempting a chuckle, Ayame smiled cheeringly. "We have different talents, of course. I am simply more outgoing than you are, but you have a talent that I envy. You're kindhearted and selfless. You sincerely care about other people's feelings more than your own. That's so difficult for me," letting his voice drop, he soothed his hand across the monkey's forehead. "You aren't a burden at all. You're a wonderful friend."

The redhead closed his eyes, trying to block out Ayame's concerned stare. "I just wanted to do something with my life. I wanted to be a better person, to live on my own and stop bothering my mother. But it's over. They're making me leave college. They told me," hiding his eyes in the palm of his hands, he spilled a fresh batch of tears down his cheeks, "they told me I'm a disturbance to other students. And I know I am! I'm so sorry that I can't be as confident as you are, Ayame-san!"

"Your life isn't over at all, Ritsu!" Scolding his cousin gently, the snake racked his brain for some way to console him. "You are still so talented! Your paintings are stunning, and I know your teachers will regret letting you go! Just because you aren't graduating college doesn't mean you can't make it on your own." He gestured dramatically, offering Ritsu a charming smile. "You know that I never even attended college, of course. I simply did not find it necessary because I was already brilliant at my work. You're such a gifted artist, you don't need lessons either!"

"No, no," Ritsu shook his head, dimly protesting the other man's flattery. "I'll never be able to have a job. I'm just too stupid. I always mess up." Stealing a glance in Ayame's direction, he made eye-contact, wordlessly conveying the honesty in his statement. "I," he hesitated, fighting to find his voice. "I just don't know what to do, Ayame-san." Watching his cousin's expression brim with concern, he gasped, clamping his hands over his mouth. "But don't worry about it! It isn't your problem! I'm so sorry for troubling you!"

Ayame searched his mind for some advice to offer the younger man, but nothing came to him. "Don't say those things, sweet Monkey-chan! I'm sure you could find a job!" He paused, giving the redhead a chance to reply, but continued as soon as he saw that Ritsu intended to stay silent. "You could, well, you could paint portraits in the park! Or you could help your mother at the onsen!" His stomach fell as he noted the disappointment on his companion's face. "Or," in a hasty attempt to encourage his depressed cousin, the suggestion escaped his lips automatically, "you could come work for me at my shop!"

"What?" Ritsu face brightened for a moment, but then fell under a new shadow. "Oh no! I just couldn't! I would ruin your business! I'm not good enough to work with you, Ayame-san! I shouldn't be imposing on you like this! I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!"

"But Ritchan, business has been doing so well, and it is really too much for Mine and I to manage!" Inventing a story in his mind, he backed his lie with a gleeful tone. "Yes, I was just thinking the other day that it would be marvelous to have another assistant to aid in my many projects, and I believe that you would be just perfect for the job!"

Biting his lip, the redhead blushed in his uneasiness. "But, but, I'm sure you could find someone better than me! I just couldn't burden you with my presence!"

"Oh, no, no, no! You're just perfect" Ayame nodded his head, finally appreciating the magnitude of his impulsive decision. 'Little Ritchan would be with me every day?' His heart leaped at the idea, and a giddy grin spread across his face. 'I would have so many opportunities to get to know him better! This is marvelous! He could even-,' a tingling sensation spread through the silver-haired man's veins as a pleasing thought came to his mind, 'move in with me.' Displaying an inflamed sense of determination, his voice reached a crescendo. "You could even share my apartment! I wouldn't want you to endure such a long commute every morning!"

"No!" Ritsu replied a bit too loudly. His blush deepened as he struggled to continue. "I couldn't! I'm sorry!"

"Of course you could!" Ayame argued, becoming very persuasive. "I have a spare room, and I'm sure that I could convince Akito to allow the move. I would love to share my house with you! I just get so bored living there all alone!" Pouting, he hoped to charm the monkey into accepting his offer. "You wouldn't want me to be bored, now would you, little Ritchan? Will you refuse my generous hospitality like that?"

Looking torn, Ritsu buried his face in his hands. "I, I'm sorry," he sniffled, biting his lip. "If it isn't any trouble I'd, I'd really love to come stay with you." His flush seemed to glow as he hurried to add, "but only if you want me to, Ayame-san."

"Of course I want you to! I simply cannot wait for you to move in!" He offered the other man a sparkling grin, waving his arms around majestically. "Oh, it will be fantastic! You could even start work this weekend if you get feeling better!" The silver-haired man beamed at Ritsu, sighing as his chest filled with pleasurable warmth. "I cannot wait!"

"Ayame-san?" A slight smile played on the monkey's lips as his eyes filled with adoration for the other man. Sliding a hand through his hair, he whispered warily. "Why are you always so nice to me?"

"Because," watching the younger man's face, Ayame felt his pulse quicken. In the redhead's gaze he saw love, excitement, and, above all, trust. 'This is it. He's opening up to me,' smiling as he noted the delight in his heart, the silver-haired man nodded with satisfaction. 'This is the real Ritsu. The one that I've been searching to find! And he's even more beautiful than I expected!' He leaned forward, letting his fingers dance through the monkey's shining tresses. "Can't you see it, my Ritchan? Haven't you realized what I'm feeling inside? I'm in love with you."

* * *

No language lessons in this chapter...it never happens in the depressing parts of the story! 

Were they both in character? Aaya is difficult to write when he's being serious:(

Thanks to all my beautiful reviewers! To answer some of your questions...Luna, there won't be a lemon, but there'll be some lime action in a later chapter...ColdHeartFrozen (I think I got that right!) I'm not going to say if Ritchan will paint Ayame yet...because that would give away my ending...but I promise that the portrait painting and the sex won't occur in the same chapter...that reeks too much of a DiCaprio Kate Winslet Titanic thing! XP

Next time...see what Ritsu says about Aaya's confession!


	9. Blossoming Tree

**Thanks for 50 reviews...and over! I never thought this would be so popular! thank you all!**

Hello hello everyone! That chapter took a little longer than expected...blame it all on "The Half-Blood Prince"...I borrowed it from a friend a few days ago and I haven't been able to put it down! ha ha! Well...this chapter is interesting...Ayame really lives up to his role as "drama king" (if he was a girl, I'd say he has PMS...well...you never know with him.) I didn't mean for him to get so moody, but he kind-of took on a life of his own. Anyways, in this story so far I've had a little confusion, sometimes calling Ritsu "Monkey-chan" and sometimes "Monkey-kun"...to be honest, I don't really know the difference. Does anyone else know?

* * *

"I'm in love with you." Ignoring the astounded look on his companion's face, Ayame closed the gap between them, sighing as his lips brushed against the monkey's mouth. At the contact, his pulse quickened unexpectedly, his entire body delighting in the pleasurable sensation. Licking softly at the other man's flesh, he focused all his energy on wordlessly conveying the truth in his statement, wrapping his arm around Ritsu to confirm his sincerity. "Please believe me."

Feeling the other man's lips on his own, Ritsu gasped, falling limp as a deep blush spread across his features. "Ayame-san?" He managed to produce a feeble whisper. His body trembled in the snake's embrace, cold sweat gathering on his brow as he struggled to catch his breath. But, unlike the kiss in the restaurant, he did not pull away.

Regretfully releasing his hold on the redhead, the silver-haired man drew backwards slightly so as to meet Ritsu's bewildered stare. He watched the other man's eyes as they widened to become two orbs, glowing with both hope and embarrassment. 'Oh Ritchan, please believe me. I need to be near you. You are so perfect to me, and I long to get to know you better. Please let me.' Offering a reassuring smile, he smoothed a hand down Ritsu's cheek. "But surely you've known all along!"

Ritsu's face flushed as he hid his head in the blankets. "I, I, I, no, Ayame-san, I don't think, I mean, I'm so sorry!" He bit his lip, gasping as a new batch of tears brimmed under his eyelashes. "But, but, I just don't see why. You hardly know me, I mean, I, well, you must not know how dumb I am." His expression was that of turmoil as he appeared to be racking his brain for something to disprove Ayame's words. "I, well, I annoy you! I'm worthless, and I mess up everything! Why would you-?"

"Sweet Ritchan, don't criticize yourself like that!" Correcting his cousin, he brought a slender finger to Ritsu's lips in order to stop the cries. "I'm certain you already knew that I had fallen madly in love with you. Oh yes, it must be so obvious! Well, I've always believed that the best way to deal with emotions is to show them, and I know that I haven't hidden any of my feelings from you," he spoke loudly, trying to soothe Ritsu's apprehension with his emphatic tone. "Of course," exaggerating a frown, he dropped his voice to match his pout, "I will be simply heart-broken if you refuse me."

"W, w, why?" The redhead stammered, failing to mask his doubts as he chanced a curious glance in the snake's direction. "Why do you like me? I haven't done anything for you. I only make mistakes when I'm with you. You should hate me."

"No, no, no," as Ayame shook his head in objection, his silver locks flew from side to side. "You should never ask someone to explain their love. Love is spontaneous, and it is certainly not about what one person has done for the other. It's unexplainably automatic, but powerful nonetheless," reciting his reply as if it were a monologue in a play, he swept his arms towards the other man with a laugh. "That day you visited my shop I was instantly smitten with you. At first I longed only to gain your forgiveness, but soon I found myself wanting much more." He winked, taking the younger boy's hand in his own. "I believe that you are in love with me, as well. Won't you confirm my deepest desires?"

"Oh, I, um," Quivering, the monkey shut his eyes, chewing on his lip as he processed the other man's words. "I can't believe it, I mean, well, you deserve so much better, but I," stopping to take a breath, he turned away from the snake, "is it OK if I tell you the truth? It won't bother you?"

'The truth will bother me?' Ayame felt his stomach clench as he rested a hand on the other man's shoulder. 'No, no! Did I misread him? Impossible! I know I've glimpsed love in his eyes. I've noted all the times he's fallen limp into my caresses. I simply could not be wrong about such a thing! After all, romance is my specialty! But,' he sighed, offering a strained smile, 'even so, if I have made a mistake, I might lose him.' Forcing his voice to steady, he maintained his cheerful façade. "Oh, dear Ritchan! How many times do I have to tell you that I want you to be honest with me? I would never get angry at you for telling the truth!"

"I know, Ayame-san. I'm sorry!" The monkey continued, his voice growing increasingly meek. "I was just so scared and I, I just couldn't believe it, I mean, I wanted this, but," his body trembled with nervousness as he turned his gaze to the heap of blankets at his feet. "I've, well, you know, kind-of liked you for a long time." His hands flew to his face as his cheeks brightened. "I mean, I'm sorry for talking about it! I know you were probably just joking! I shouldn't have troubled you like this! I'm so sorry!" He collapsed in a teary heap, burying his head in the pillow. "I'm so sorry for everything!"

The snake's heart danced in his chest, excitement racing through his veins. "Ritsu, that's wonderful news! No need to apologize!" Nearly lunging onto the bed in his eagerness, Ayame pulled his cousin into a choking hug. "How fabulous! We will make the best couple, of course. I mean, with my charm and your kindness, we compliment each other perfectly! We couldn't help but fall in love!" His laughter rang through the silent room as his smile brightened. "And with you coming to live with me, everything will be just perfect!"

After giggling nervously, Ritsu's tone became increasingly serious. "Thank you, Ayame-san. I, I," he brushed a tear from his eyes, meeting the other man's stare with gratefulness. "I always imagined I would have to live alone. I thought, well, I thought that no one could ever care about me. I thought I, well, that I could die," his voice cracked as he struggled to find his words, "and no one would even notice. But now, I, I'm," his lips spread into a soft smile, "so happy. Thank you, Ayame-san."

"Oh, Ritchan!" Ayame's heart melted at the monkey's honesty. Ritsu trusted him now, he was seeing the truth about himself, and he was offering the older Sohma a part of his life. And he became even more beautiful with every passing second. Reaching for the redhead's hand, he sighed emphatically. "Ritsu, will you do me the honor of being my boyfriend?"

"Of course, I mean, if you want me to, Ayame-san," Ritsu bowed his head slightly, shielding his blushing face. "I would like that very much."

The older man brought a finger to his new boyfriend's chin, easing the cross dresser's face closer. He forced Ritsu to meet his gaze, smiling at his delicate features and trembling body. "Don't be nervous, my dearest Ritsu," he whispered silkily, smoothing his other hand through the monkey's tresses. "You know I love you." Winking, he brushed his lips against Ritsu's, reveling in the electricity of their kiss. Sucking on the younger man's bottom lip, he sensed adrenaline as it rushed through his veins, causing his mind to slip into dazed pleasure. "I love you." He sighed into the kiss, nearly exploding with glee as he felt the shy man starting to respond. "My Ritchan."

Behind Ayame, someone cleared his throat, bringing the two men back to reality. "I need to reassess Ritsu's condition," Hatori kept a business-like demeanor as he approached the bed. "I'll need you to step outside, Aaya."

Releasing his hold on the redhead, Ayame whirled around. "Oh, Ha'ri! Don't be silly! My little Monkey-chan doesn't care if I stay in the room!" He turned his attention back to the younger Sohma, flashing a sparkling grin. "Right, sweet Ritchan?"

"I, um, well," Ritsu breathing was jagged and frantic as he shivered under the doctor's stoic stare. "N, n, no, Ayame-san. Of course not, I-."

"You need to leave," the seahorse repeated himself, apparently frustrated by Ayame's failure to obey. "I'll speak with you when I am finished."

Heaving an annoyed groan, the snake strutted toward the door. "Lighten up, Hatori-san!" He insisted, rolling his eyes as he ignored the other man's disapproving stare. He cast his gaze on the bed once more, brightening swiftly as he remembered his new relationship. "Farewell, lovely Ritchan! I will miss you every second we are apart!" With a dramatic wave, he sashayed into the darkened hallway. "_A tout à l'heure_!"

* * *

Leaning against the stark wall of Hatori's office, Ayame heaved an impatient sigh. 'Oh, Ha'ri! Always so concerned with your business! What on earth could be taking so long?' He laughed slightly as he remembered the stone-like expression that his friend wore after breaking up the kiss. 'He didn't even look surprised! I guess it takes a lot to startle him!' 

At the thought of the kiss, he brightened. Pacing, he exaggerated each step, swaying from side to side in a fancy display of footwork. 'Ah, finally, Ritchan is mine!' He touched a finger to his lips in remembrance of the joyful sensation. 'Finally we can be together! Finally I'll show him my love.'

"Aaya?" A knock at the door shook the snake from his daydreams. Sliding the screen sideways, the seahorse emerged from the shadows with a grim look in his eyes. Nodding to his cousin, he led the snake out onto the porch, extracting a cigarette from his pocket and lighting it at his lips. "How long have you been with Ritsu?" His voice remained emotionless.

"Oh!" Misunderstanding his friend's concern for innocent curiosity, the silver-haired man launched into a vivid tale. "Isn't it fabulous? Actually, he and I became 'official' tonight, but we've had a few dates before. Well, you remember the play, I trust? I also took him out to eat at the steakhouse, but that didn't go as well as intended. You know how Ritchan can be sometimes," winking, Ayame flipped his hair over his shoulder before continuing. "But tonight I finally had the chance to talk to him about it! I'm so excited! We're the perfect match! It's just perfect, isn't it, Ha'ri?"

"Aaya," meeting his friend's laughter with a frigid stare, the doctor shook his head, "I don't want you dating him."

'What?' Taken aback by Hatori's command, the snake's eyes narrowed suspiciously. 'Why would he care? Unless-?' He chuckled, touching the other man's shoulder in a teasing gesture. "Oh, Ha'ri! No need to be jealous!" He floated majestically to the edge of the wooden flooring, swinging his legs out over the gravel garden below. "You know you'll always hold a special place in my heart! But," sighing, he gave the other man a pointed smile, "when things don't work out, sometimes it's best to move on."

"Aaya," the doctor's face showed only a hint of his obvious frustration. "You know that's not what I mean. Ritsu is fragile. You should know that by now. Making him a part of your little game is a real threat to his safety."

"My little," Ayame sputtered, looking scandalized, "_game_?" He clamped one long-fingered hand over his chest, using the other to reach for the doctor's arm. "How could you ever say such a thing? Me, playing games with poor little Ritchan? I thought you knew me better than that!"

"I'm warning you _because _I know you, Aaya," Hatori subtly moved away from the other man's touch. "I know how you think. This might be a game for you, but to Ritsu, it certainly is not. You make a habit of using people for your own pleasure or glory, and when you're bored, you throw them away. You can't do that with him. It will damage his life more than you could ever understand."

Ayame felt anger flare up in his veins. He accepted that he had been selfish in the past, but to hear his friend jumping to conclusions about his feelings for the monkey infuriated him. "Who are you to tell me what I feel for Ritsu?" The snake even surprised himself with the accusations he hurled at his long-time idol. "You always ignored me, Ha'ri! I always tried to show you why I acted as I did, but you couldn't even give me the time of day. I wanted to share my heart with you, but you just brushed me aside as if I were just a nuisance to you." Stamping his foot like a spoiled child, he hurriedly brushed the tears from his eyes, overcome by a wave of long-suppressed grievances. "You were always so kind to those around you, but not to me. Why, Hatori? Was I really that terrible?"

"I couldn't let you use me. I knew what you wanted from me, and no amount of kindness was going to make me give it up to you," the seahorse remained calm, his emotionless words forming a sharp contrast to his companion's impassioned speech. "I'm not like you, Aaya."

"You could have at least told me!" Ayame collapsed in a dramatic sob. "Instead I spent years following you around, making a fool of myself and clinging to some false hope that you were only being coy with me. I admired you so much, Ha'ri. I didn't want to use you. I, I," he sniffed, trying to catch his breath. "I loved you. But you were not brave enough to tell me, so you led me on, fueling my hopes and making me feel like even more of a fool when Kana came and I finally figured it out. Why didn't you tell me the truth the first time I explained my love for you?" He shook his finger reproachfully at his cousin. "Why couldn't you tell me that the feelings weren't mutual?"

"I'm telling you now," Hatori responded simply. "I never loved you."

Pain stabbed at the silver-haired man's heart, but he brushed it away, nodding to the doctor in appreciation. "That's all I needed to know," he managed to regain some level of composure as he rose to his feet, although his voice remained slightly diminished. "But now I must return to my dearest little Ritchan." Sweeping his arm through the air, he caused the veil of cigarette smoke around Hatori's head to swirl. "Sorry I could not have stayed longer," he added in what seemed to be a tone of fabricated politeness, although it came off as being little better than sarcasm.

"Ayame," the black-haired man warned, stopping his cousin with his stern words. "I think that Ritsu has seen enough visitors tonight. It's best that you return home."

Whirling around with flaming eyes, the snake stared at the other man. "Who are you to decide who I should love now? You led me on for ten years, but you call me the deceptive one? I love Ritchan, though it seems you would never understand," heaving an exasperated sigh, he headed to the door. "Oh, by the way," he instantly shed his rage, replacing it with a sly smile. "My Monkey-chan will be joining my at my apartment starting this weekend. If you want to keep Akito happy, I suggest you talk to him about it, because I don't intend to ask anyone else for their opinions on our relationship."

Strutting down the hall with confidence, the snake did not wait to hear the doctor's response. He was still astounded by his encounter with the other man, incredulous at the seahorse's alien insensitivity as well as his own loss of veneration for the reserved man. 'He never cared about me? I must be the only person to whom he's ever showed such indifference,' sighing, he searched vaguely for his boyfriend's room. 'But I really don't care anymore. Who was he to accuse me of playing with Ritsu's heart? I know I've done some selfish things, but I'm trying to change! He doesn't even try to understand that! And I love Ritchan! I love him more than Hatori, or anyone else, for that matter. I-.'

His thoughts were interrupted as he took note of Ritsu's door in front of him. His heart quickened instantly, his fingers flying to the door handle in anticipation. Resisting his desire to burst into the room and make a histrionic entrance, he instead slipped through the door and towards the bed with a hopeful look in his eyes. 'He's asleep,' he realized at once, grateful that he had used some caution when crossing the threshold into the darkened space. Sighing, he approached the dozing form. 'He looks so peaceful. Perhaps he's dreaming of me?'

Lowering himself gracefully onto the nearby chair, he took one of the monkey's clammy hands in his own, feeling his chest warm as he used his free fingers to massage the man's red tresses. 'And so beautiful.' He leaned forward, planting a light kiss on his boyfriend's brow. 'It doesn't matter what Hatori thinks anymore. I'm changing, and I'm doing it for you, my sweet Ritchan. I'm starting over, just to show you how much I care about you.'

Looking to the window, Ayame smiled as he watched the sun's first rays creeping between the trees of the Sohma estate. Squeezing the redhead's fingers affectionately, he felt his heart lighten at the sight before him. Outside, on a nearby cherry tree, a single blossom was opening. The first sign of a new spring. 'I'm starting over, because I love you.'

* * *

**Francais avec Ayame #9...or something**

_a tout a l'heure- _bye bye or "toot-a-loo"

Next chapter...Ritsu moves to Ayame's apartment.

Oh, by the way, Slow Motion Runner, I totally agree with you on cutting as an overused method of suicide in fan fiction. I think people like it because it's such a romantic notion...it's painful, messy, and dramatic. But I knew that wasn't the thing for Ritsu, and I knew I didn't want to look like I was copying other authors. So I thought about it for a long time, and decided that overdose suited him best. Yep, it is a morbid thing to mull over while writing, isn't it?


	10. Rhythmic Raindrops

Hello! I finished this chapter fairly quickly! Yay! That's because I'm really working to have this entirely finished before I go off to college next week. ;) But I doubt it will happen. So, anyways, I hear that I'm not allowed to address specific reviewers when answering questions...so, I guess I'll have to keep this general. Some of you seemed to be concerned about Hatori's actions last chapter. I didn't really intend for him to be _mean_, I just think that because he and Aaya are so different they have trouble understanding each other. I relate better to Ayame, so perhaps I was a little harder on Ha'ri than I should be?

By the way, one of my wonderful reviewers (sorry I can't name you!) explained to me the difference between "chan" and "kun", and I realized it fits perfectly! In my story I had Aaya calling Ritsu "chan" when he dressed as a girl, and "kun" when he dressed as a boy! Ha ha! What a coincidence!

Enjoy and review!

* * *

'He should be here soon,' Ayame glanced at the clock, fingering his silk curtains with greedy anticipation. The street below was obscured by rain, and he had to squint to identify each passing figure, hoping to find his new boyfriend among them. Tick. Tick. Tick. The minute hand seemed to be moving impossibly slow, for each time the snake took to watching its movements, he found it in nearly the exact place in which he had seen it before. Tick. Tick. Tick. 'Oh! I simply cannot wait any longer!'

Flying through the kitchen and into his vibrant living room, the silver-haired man began another detailed inspection of his handiwork. Everything was in order; Each piece of furniture seemed to sparkle with the time he had put into polishing it. Moving to the bedroom, he reached to arrange a vase of fresh-cut lilies on his bedside table, delighting in their fragrant aroma. 'I hope my Ritchan likes purple!' He sighed as he fingered the lavender petals. 'He always seems to be wearing it, of course. It compliments his hair perfectly!'

A fire seemed to spark in his veins as a picture of the monkey arose in his mind. 'Oh, Ritsu!' He gasped lightly, brushing an imaginary speck of dust from his pillow as he basked in excitement. 'I can't believe you will be living with me from now on! This is so fabulous! I never dreamed that this would happen between us, but, naturally, I can understand why we were drawn to one another!' Jumping to his feet, he combed a stray lock of hair into his shining braid. 'After all,' he giggled, 'we always were the two most stunning members of the family, not to mention the best-dressed!'

Flouncing down the hall and back to his place at the kitchen table, Ayame smoothed his hands over his velvet coat. 'I want everything to be perfect for you, Monkey-chan!' He slid into his seat, letting the noise of falling raindrops guide his thoughts. Plop. Plop. Plop. The sound of water hitting the roof seemed to coincide with the hammering of his heart, causing his mind to fall into the pulsing rhythm. Sighing dazedly, he barely noticed the clock until it struck seven o'clock.

Slam. 'What was that?' The metallic thud of a car door closing brought the snake back to reality. He rushed to the window, smiling brightly as he made out the shape of a black vehicle parked on the curb outside his building. 'Ritchan?' His stomach leaped in his chest as he saw a familiar woman extracting a box from the open trunk. An older man joined her, producing two bulging suitcases from somewhere behind his seat. Finally, another man emerged, this one clad in a tiny green dress with a matching ribbon laced through his tresses. 'Dear Monkey-chan!'

Grabbing his umbrella and bolting down the stairs and through his shop, Ayame wrenched open the door, hurrying to meet his cousin. "_Mon petit ami_!" He caught the other man in his arms, enveloping him in a joyful embrace. "I've missed you so dearly!" In his eagerness, he captured the redhead's lips with his own, melting against Ritsu's body as his chest warmed with passion. "It's so wonderful to see you!" He whispered into the kiss.

"Y, y, yes, Ayame-san," the cross dresser offered a blushing grin, shyly responding to his boyfriend's touch. "T, t, thank you so much for letting me come here."

"Oh, it's my pleasure!" He waved his arm majestically, finally remembering the two onlookers standing behind him. "But, of course," he bowed to Ritsu's mother, kissing her lightly on the hand, "thank you for allowing me this time with your son."

Her gaunt eyes widened with fear. "Are you sure it's not a problem, I mean, you don't have to do this. I, I know he can be difficult sometimes. I hope he hasn't imposed himself on you!" The color drained from her cheeks as her breath quickened unexpectedly. "I'm so sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I apologize for my son's rudeness!" Panic flashed across her features as she dropped to her knees before the silver-haired man. "I'M SO SORRY!"

Ayame smiled slightly, helping the groveling woman to her feet. "Now, now, look what you're doing to your pretty dress," he dried the muddy water from her garment, pulling her under his umbrella and motioning for Ritsu to join them. "Let's get out of this wretched rain, shall we?" Linking hands with the redhead, he led both mother and son into the doorway of his store. He glanced over his shoulder, focusing on the single person left behind. "And you, sir, must be Ritsu's father?"

"Yes," he replied, casting the snake a cold, appraising stare.

"Oh, fantastic!" The silver-haired man flashed a charming grin, ignoring the other man's unpleasant demeanor. "So pleased to meet you! Why haven't we met before?" Falling forward into another bow, he paused, but continued when the man offered no response. "Well, come, come! Let's not keep them waiting!" He took one of the suitcases from the father, joining up with the others inside his warm apartment.

"_Chez Ayame_!" The snake threw open his arms, gesturing to the enticing kitchen around them. "Does it please you, sweet Ritchan?"

The redhead looked startled by the question, his mouth falling slightly agape with surprise. "Of course, Ayame-san!" He hurried to compliment his boyfriend. "It's, it's, it's beautiful!" Scanning the room, a content smile played on his features, casting any embarrassment or fear from his voice. "Thank you so much!"

"A beautiful house for a beautiful man!" The snake teased in response, disregarding Ritsu's parents as he draped an arm around the younger man's shoulders. "You certainly will fit in here, _mon cher_!" Whispering into his companion's ear, he turned to address the others in a louder tone. "Please, please, come in! Make yourselves at home! You can just leave Ritsu's belongings in the corner. Yes, that's right!" Taking the older woman's hand, he guided her and her husband towards the table. "Let me get you something to drink. I make the most splendid tea! But," he winked as she hesitated to take a seat, "I won't make it for just anyone."

"_Shitsurei shimasu_!" Ritsu's mother shook her head frantically, her sallow face contorting into a look of anxiety. "I'm so sorry, please excuse me, but my husband and I have to be get back to the onsen. I'm so sorry!"

Watching her, Ayame had to suppress his disbelief at the changing appearance of her face. Just like the night in the hospital, her skin appeared pale and etched with worry. Her eyes seemed lifeless as they sunk into their darkened sockets, making her look almost like a rotting skeleton. It seemed as if she had aged a hundred years in an instant. 'I've heard she's been sick. Oh, poor Ritchan will be so distressed if something happens to her,' the silver-haired man realized as he concealed his astonishment with a friendly chuckle. Continuing his bright façade, he pushed the troubling thoughts out of his mind. "Oh, I'm sure you could spare a few minutes! I know that Ritsu would simply cherish the time with you!"

Reaching across the table, Ritsu's father gave the woman's hand a comforting squeeze. "If my wife says we need to go, we will go," he shot his son an accusatory stare, as if he had been the cause of her outburst rather than Ayame. He turned to the snake, faking politeness with a begrudging sigh. "Thank you for your hospitality, and for taking my son into your house."

"Oh," he giggled, "it really is no trouble at all! I'm sure he'll be a magnificent assistant to me in my business," he found the redhead's hand under the table, capturing the clammy fingers with his own, "as well as offering me outstanding companionship."

Ritsu's face lit up with a blush as he studied the floor, attempting to avoid the eyes of the people surrounding him. "I, I, I hope so, Ayame-san."

"Oh, I know so!" The dress designer brushed his braid over his shoulder, rising to his feet dramatically as he eased the mother's chair out from under the table. "Well, if you really must be going, please promise that you will make time to visit us for dinner sometime soon." He led the parents to the door, bowing with a sincere grin. "We would both be so pleased if you would grace us with your company."

Nodding shyly, the onsen woman attempted to accept. "That would be very nice, if it wouldn't be intruding, of course! I wouldn't want to trouble you like that! I think I've already infringed on your hospitality! I'm so sorry!" Returning the bow, she rushed to her son, brushing a stray lock of hair from his face. "Please don't bother Ayame-san! Don't forget you manners, and please try to do better at things than you usually do!" Her gaze flew back to the snake. "I'm sorry! I apologize for my son!"

"No need to apologize at all! I love your son!" He gave her an encouraging pat, directing her outside. "I promise to take very good care of him! Don't you worry at all!"

"I, I," looking away, she fell into her husband's comforting embrace.

Ritsu watched them as they left, his eyes filling with obvious worry. "Good-bye, mother! Good-bye, father! I, I, I love you!"

Staring over his shoulder, the older man responded carelessly. "Good-bye," he shrugged, ignoring his son as he helped his wife into the car.

Ayame winced internally as he saw the hurt creep onto his boyfriend's face. He longed to chase after the couple and demand that they give the monkey a more affectionate 'farewell', but he knew inside that forced tenderness would not ease any of the his companion's pain. 'How horrible! No wonder he's so insecure!' Slipping his arm around the other man's waist, he silently consoled his cousin. 'How could they not love such a wonderful person?'

"Well!" The silver-haired man smiled weakly as he tried to break the silence. "How about some of that tea?" Not waiting for any kind of response, he guided the redhead back towards his apartment. "Oh, I'm so excited, sweet Ritchan! I spent all day preparing for your arrival! I hope everything is just perfect for you! Now," he grinned mischievously, sliding his hand up the monkey's back, "I must warn you that the spare room is still being used for my studio, so we will have to share a bed until I finish converting it for you."

"Oh, ah!" The redhead flushed a deep shade of crimson. "That's OK, I mean, don't trouble yourself! I could, I could, well, sleep on the floor. I'm so sorry for imposing on you like this!"

"Nonsense, I will very much love sharing a bedroom with you!" He enjoyed seeing the monkey's blush deepen at his words. "Don't you dare listen to a single thing your mom said to you! You know that I want you here!" Opening his apartment door, he leaned forward, capturing his boyfriend in his arms and purring in his ear. "Now we're finally alone," Ayame giggled, pressing his hungry lips against Ritsu's, catching him in a passionate kiss. "And I'm so happy."

* * *

"A, A, Ayame-san?" A little voice squeaked from the other side of the snake's wall. "Are you sure this is all right?" 

Relaxing against his pillow, Ayame looked up as he heard his boyfriend's footsteps drawing closer. 'Ah, sweet Ritchan!' He focused on the doorway in which the redhead stood, feeling his pulse quicken in anticipation. Studying the lines of the monkey's robe as they clung to his petite body, the older man sensed a jolt of desire pulsing through his veins. "Oh no, of course not!" He threw open his arms, gesturing for the cross dresser to join him in bed. "It's my pleasure!"

"I, I, thank you," Ritsu's face shone scarlet as he shifted uneasily under the snake's watch. "But if you don't want me to, I don't mind sleeping on the floor at all! It's OK! I don't mind! Don't try to be nice to me!"

The silver-haired man chuckled, offering his cousin a flirtatious wink. "Now, now, my Ritchan. If you sleep on the floor, I will miss your presence far too much to make it through the night! I could never pass up an opportunity to be with you!" He took the other man's hand, helping him into the luxurious bed and between the silky sheets. "Oh, come on, dear Monkey-chan!" Wrapping his arms around the redhead's waist, he giggled with satisfaction as he felt the other body tense beneath him. "Don't be such a tease!"

Trying the return the carefree laugh, Ritsu only managed a nervous titter. "I'm sorry!" He responded automatically, staring wide-eyed at the other man. "What should I-." He bit his lip, breaking out in a cold sweat. "I mean, are we going to-?"

Ayame felt something jump in his stomach as fire ignited between his legs. He realized what Ritsu expected him to do, but, judging by the terrified expression on the other man's face, he knew that he could not accept the unsure offer. "Oh, you don't need to do anything!" He ran a long finger through his boyfriend's ginger locks. "Just holding you like this is wonderful enough!" He slipped his other hand under the monkey's chin, sighing emphatically as he caressed the smooth flesh. "We really must take things slow, I suppose. If that suits you, dearest lover."

Ritsu shivered under the snake's touch. "Yes, I mean, if that's what you want, Ayame-san." He moved one trembling hand up the other man's back, desperately searching his companion's eyes for signs of approval.

'I want you,' Ayame bit back his temptation to speak his wishes aloud, instead reassuring his cousin with a gentle kiss. 'Oh God! I want you so much!' As their lips met, the heat of the contact seemed to elicit a flood of emotions from within the silver-haired man's heart. He had Ritsu in his arms at last, finally they were together. 'And it's everything I expected, and more.'

Opening his mouth, Ayame let his tongue dance across the other man's heated skin. His half-lidded gaze swarmed with the colors of a dazed fantasy, and he clasped Ritsu's body against his own, losing control over his mind with every jagged breath. Inadvertently, his hands slid up the thin fabric of the monkey's robe, pausing only when he noted the erratic rhythm of his boyfriend's heart against his chest.

"W, w, what?" The redhead stammered, looking away from Ayame in his embarrassment. "It's OK, I'm fine, really, I-."

'He's truly frightened,' the older man's heart nearly exploded as he watched his cousin fumble for words. 'Oh, Ritchan, I don't want to scare you!' He reached out to the younger Sohma, affectionately caressing his shoulder. A strange emotion welled in the pit of the dress designer's stomach at the contact. Selflessness. He wanted Ritsu to be happy, more than he wished to gratify himself. Seeing his boyfriend smile brought more satisfaction to him than any self-centered choice he might make. 'Because I love Ritsu. I love him! He's worth more to me than anything I could ever achieve in my life.'

Ayame regained control of his body as he held the redhead in a warm embrace. "I love you. _Je t'aime_," he moaned into the other man's ear. "I care about you. I don't want you to be scared anymore, or worry about offending me. I just want to make you happy."

"Oh!" Ritsu gasped, taken aback by the other man's request. "I'm happy as long as you're happy, I mean, whatever you think is best is fine for me!" He struggled to be honest, dropping his voice to a hushed whisper as he relaxed against the snake's body. "I'm really trying to be better, Ayame-san. I promise that I'll be more confident for you, if you want me to."

"Oh, Ritchan!" He grinned in response, nuzzling his face into the other man's hair. "I love you exactly how you are. I hope that you will be more confident, of course, but only change when you feel ready."

"Thank you, Ayame-san," Ritsu closed his eyes, spreading his lips into a content smile. "I, I, I, well," he smiled, "I love you, too."

"I know, sweet Monkey-chan," nodding in agreement, Ayame studied the other man's face with enchanted intent. He watched the moonlight as it illuminated his delicate features, making him glow like an angel in the darkness. 'My little angel!' He shivered at the idea, pulling the other man's body even closer to his own. 'My lovely Ritchan.' Shutting his eyes, he let the sound of raindrops on his roof lull him into serenity. "Good night, my love."

* * *

**Francais Avec Ayame #10 **(with a little Japanese thrown in, as well. Would you believe this is the first time I've ever used Japanese in a fanfic!) 

_Mon petit ami_- my boyfriend

_Mon cher_- my dear

_Chez Ayame_- Ayame's house

_Shitsurei shimasu_- literally, "I'm being rude" used by Japanese to excuse themselves when leaving a conversation, as well as when entering someone else's house. It seemed to suit Ritsu's mom perfectly, and I couldn't translate it into English, so I just had to give in and write a little Japanese! ;)

_Je t'aime_- I love you

ha ha, never fear...that **wasn't** the lime I promised to write! It's coming, I swear :) Next chapter...another Ayame and Yuki "bonding moment"! lol!


	11. Little Brown Box

Well...I have returned with another chapter! XP But, unfortunately I don't think I'll be able to finish before I go to college. I guess the last few chapters will just take me a little longer to write...

Hmmm, I missed most of my usual readers/reviewers last chapter. I hope there wasn't a problem with my writing that scared you all away! Or else there could've been a problem with this site(which is very possible! >. ) However, I suspect that, because I had to revise the chapter shortly after my original posting, some of the links in the alert emails did not work. **If the link to my last chapter sent in the Story Alert did not work**...yes, **the chapter is posted**...yes, **the link to the chapter from this page should work**...and, **yes, it is rather important to go back and read it before continuing! **It will just make more sense that way! ;)

Well, this is the longest chapter that I've ever written...I hope it isn't too boring! I'm unsure whether or not it is too wordy, or too long, or both. Please tell me what you think! Enjoy and review!

* * *

"Dearest Ritchan?" Ayame let his foot slide off of the sewing machine pedal, bringing the buzz of needle puncturing fabric to a momentary halt. Leaning back in his chair, he looked to the doorway, expecting his boyfriend to materialize in an instant. "Ritsu, love, will you please bring me the scissors?" 

"Yes, Ayame-san," the redhead scurried into the room, dropping a box of fabric scraps as he fell into an apologetic bow. "I'm so sorry to have kept you waiting!" His hand plunged into a nearby drawer, producing the gleaming blades and rushing them to the snake's worktable. "I'm so sorry!"

"No need to worry!" The older Sohma reminded him, smiling as he embraced the other man's trembling body. Taking the scissors, he spread his fingers through the plastic handle, carefully trimming a stray thread from his present project. "Thank you, lover!" He pecked the blushing monkey on the cheek, giving his arm a squeeze before returning to work.

Flashing a shy smile, the cross dresser fidgeted slightly, biting his lip as he struggled to return the snake's affection. "Um, Ayame-san?" He squeaked, watching his boyfriend with timid curiosity. "That's very pretty."

"Oh! You think so?" The snake's heart leaped with joy at the other man's compliment. "Yes, yes, I believe it should turn out well." Waving his arm dramatically, he rose to his feet, pulling the dress out from under the machine and draping it in front of his cousin. "Well, when one of my most devoted customers called and requested something 'sexy, but still cute', I had the most fabulous idea!" He shook the lace ensemble so as to show off its pearly hue. "Though it's my expert opinion," he giggled, purring in the younger man's ear, "that you would look much sexier on you. He really doesn't have the legs for it!"

"Oh, ah, well, I, um, I'm not sure, Ayame-san," the redhead corrected him, flushing with nervousness. "I mean-."

"Well, then, I guess we'll just have to see!" Grinning slyly, the designer slipped his fingers around the other man's waist. "When I am finished, I will most definitely need a model to exhibit my creation. Will you try this on for me, sweet Ritchan?"

Ritsu fingered the lacy garment with appreciative eyes, sighing as he studied his boyfriend's expectant features. "I would love to, I mean, if that's OK with you."

"Oh yes," the snake winked, his tone dripping with charm. "That would be just perfect." Relaxing back into his chair, Ayame resumed stitching with new inspiration, his fingers flying over the hem as he imagined the soft curves falling around his boyfriend's form. 'Oh, this will be lovely on you, _mon cher_.' he looked to the corner in which the other man worked at reorganizing a box of fabric, 'simply fabulous. Perhaps I'll even have to sew another one just for you!'

Knock. Knock. "Ayame-san?" Mine peeked into the workstation, interrupting her boss's daydreams. Taking note of Ritsu's presence, she offered him a sweet smile before turning to readdress the older man, "Ayame-san, there's someone here to see you."

The silver-haired man sprang to his feet, rushing to her in his anticipation. "Someone with a special order, perhaps?" He ventured a guess, flouncing around the room as he looked to the front of the shop. "Somebody fun?"

"No, not a customer," Mine corrected him, trying to alleviate his disappointment with a broad grin. "Somebody even better! Your little brother's girlfriend!"

"Tohru-kun?" Both men said at once, exchanging excited glances.

The dark-haired assistant beamed at her boss. "Yes, yes, that's her!" She skipped in place, clapping her hands together. "She wants to tell you about a party she's having for Yuki-kun!"

"A party! How fabulous!" Laughing, Ayame grasped Ritsu's hand and helped him to his feet. "Come on, sweet Ritchan! We must find out more about this party!" He sashayed toward the front counter, waving frantically as he caught sight of the brunette. "Greetings, Tohru-kun!" He bowed, kissing her hand as if he were a knight greeting a princess. "What brings you here on this glorious occasion? Something about a party, I hear?"

"Hi, Ayame-san!" She giggled, blushing slightly as she retracted her hand. Looking behind the flamboyant snake, she noticed the monkey clinging meekly to his robe. Her eyes widened with pleasant surprise. "Hi Ritchan-san! What are you doing here?"

"Hi Tohru-kun," he smiled, dropping his voice to a quiet squeak. "I, well, um, I work here. Ayame-san hired me after last month when I, well, you know." He shuddered at the unpleasant memory, wrapping his fingers around his boyfriend's wrist. "Ayame-san is so nice to me."

"That's wonderful!" She clutched her hands together, eyeing the couple with a joyful expression on her face. "I'm so happy for you!"

Wondering if the innocent girl realized that they were a couple, or just assumed that he was being charitable to the younger Zodiac member, Ayame gave a hearty laugh. "Oh yes, it's marvelous having him here! He's just perfect! He's a good worker, a good cook, beautiful, smart," he lightly caressed the other man's shimmering locks, "absolutely everything I could ever want!"

"T, t, that's not true, Ayame-san," Ritchan protested, studying the floor. "I don't think-."

"I'm so happy for you guys!" Tohru managed to maintain her eternal cheerfulness, offering the redhead a gentle smile so as to put him at ease. "That's really great!"

"Oh yes, I know!" Nodding emphatically, the silver-haired man looped his arm around Ritsu's waist, gesturing for Tohru to follow them. "Come now, sweet Tohru-kun. Let's sit down." Leading her into his office, he plopped her down onto a garish purple couch. "Now," after lowering the monkey onto a nearby chair, he joined her, leaning forward and staring with excited eyes. "I hear something about a party for my little brother?"

"Yes!" Remembrance dawned on Tohru's face as she met the older man's gaze. "I just found out that next Monday is Yuki's birthday, and I thought it would be nice if we could all have dinner together to celebrate," she smoothed a stray strand of hair behind her ear, beaming at the two men. "It might be a good chance for you to talk to Yuki about your relationship! I mean," She hurried to add, "if you're not too busy."

"Too busy for my dearest little _frére_?" Ayame gave a scandalized gasp, clamping his hand on his chest in emphatic surprise. "No, no, I would never even think of missing his birthday! Ritchan and I would simply _love_ to come!" Jumping to his feet, the snake began to dance in circles. "Oh my! What shall we do? What shall we do?" He snatched the monkey's palm and held it against his body. "We'll need to buy presents and party clothes, and maybe we could even aid Tohru-kun in preparing for this spectacular event!" He offered the girl a glamorous look, throwing his hair over his shoulder as he turned to address her once more. "After all, I've given my share of parties! I'm an expert, of course!"

"Yes, that sounds nice," she agreed courteously, "I'm sure Yuki would be really happy if he found out that you wanted to help." Her eyes sparkled as they studied the two men. "It would be so nice if he knew how much you care."

"Oh, I know!" The silver-haired man swept towards her, giving an exaggerated sigh. "I only wish that I could convince him how much I truly care about our relationship! My only wish is to strengthen our brotherly bond. If only," he trailed off, glancing at Ritsu as he began to pace. "If only we could do something more, something fabulous for him. Something," pausing for a thoughtful moment, the snake swiftly became ecstatic. "Oh, what a wonderful idea!" He complimented himself, chuckling, "what if we had the party here, at our apartment?"

"Well," Tohru suppressed the reluctance from her voice, trying to match the other man's enthusiasm. "I'm sure that would be fun."

"Yes, yes, it would!" He replied, strutting back towards the sofa. "You need not worry about a thing, dear little flower. Ritchan and I will take care of everything! Won't we, sweet Monkey-chan?" Studying his boyfriend, he flashed an optimistic grin.

"Y, y, yes, Ayame-san," the monkey agreed, fingering the hem of his maid costume in his nervousness. "You'll do such a good job! I'm sure Yuki-kun will love it! But, are you sure you want me to help? I mean-."

"Naturally, _mon petit ami_! Even I do not cook as well as you do, and I know very few chefs in the world who can measure up to my abilities! You'll do a magnificent job!" Prancing to the other man's chair, he casually slipped his arm around the redhead's shoulders, kissing him lightly on the cheek. "We must work together to give my brother a perfect sixteenth birthday party! I couldn't do it without my beautiful Ritchan!"

"Ayame-san!" Mine's sing-song voice echoed through the store, bringing their preparations to a halt. "Somebody really special is here to see you!"

"Oh my!" The designer laughed, surveying his two companions with playful eyes. "I've been so caught up in your company that I've simply forgotten my work!"

"I'm sorry!" Both Ritsu and Tohru apologized immediately, looking flustered by the snake's teasing.

Releasing his hold on the monkey, he rose to his feet, bowing politely. "No, no, no problem at all!" He winked. "However, I must attend to this customer. Please excuse me for a moment." As he dismissed himself from the room, his thoughts raced with excitement. 'A party for Yuki-kun? In my house?' His heart danced in his chest at the idea. "Finally, finally I'll have the chance to show him that I want to be a part of his life. I want this rift between us to close! I just need to convince him to let me draw closer to him!'

Strolling between stacks of vivid fabrics and half-finished clothing, the snake considered his assistant's words. 'Somebody really special? What a strange thing for Mine-kun to say! I can't wait to see who she,' he stopped, catching sight a familiar head of steely hair as it peered over the glass countertop. 'Yuki?' His heart stopped. His body froze, too overcome with surprise to move. 'Yuki came here, to see me?' Tears of happiness prickled in the corners of his eyes as he observed the younger boy. His stomach overflowing with warmth, he struggled to find his voice. "Yuki-kun?" He managed to croak out despite the lump in his throat. "Dearest little brother?"

Yuki whirled around at once, staring at the older man through narrow eyes. "Is Miss Honda here?"

Ignoring the question, the silver-haired man raced forward. "Oh, sweet little brother! What a coincidence! We were just talking about you!" He enveloped the rat in a forced embrace, bouncing with glee as he addressed the younger Sohma. "So, you just couldn't stand living any longer without another visit to my glorious shop? You needed your big brother's advice on something important?" Listing off suggestions as to why the boy may have visited, Ayame grew more exuberant with every word. "You've come to find out more about my life, in turn revealing more of yourself to me and therefore strengthening our brotherly bond?"

Yuki rolled his eyes. "I've come to escort Miss Honda home. Shigure told me she was here."

"Oh, quite the gentleman!" Ayame giggled, meeting his brother's icy stare with warm eyes. "Yes, yes, she's here. She and I were just discussing a very important issue," he waved his arms to illustrate the magnitude of his statement, "but we are nearly finished and I'm sure she will be simply bursting with joy when she finds out you're here." Winking at his brother, he attempted to draw a connection between himself and the other boy. "She's very fond of you, of course. It seems that you are quite the charmer, just like me! Not to mention that you certainly have my good looks! It must run in the family."

"What were you saying to Miss Honda?" The steely-haired boy demanded, groaning at his brother's boasts.

"Nothing, nothing!" The silver-haired man sighed, meeting Mine's gaze and chuckling softly. "My, aren't you paranoid today, little brother! She and I were just talking, but as for the matter of our discussion, I simply cannot disclose it at this time. Even to you, sweet Yuki-kun."

Grimacing, the rat shifted impatiently. "Fine. It doesn't matter. Just tell Miss Honda that I'm here. I don't know how much more of you I can stand."

Searing pain bit at the snake's heart. "Anything for you, little brother!" He tried to maintain his confident façade, but his words crumbled miserably due to the lump forming in his throat. He could not meet Mine's concerned stare. He couldn't bare to see the exasperation in his brother's eyes. 'And I thought everything was going so well!' Tears of hurt replaced those of delight, and he had to bite his lip to keep them from spilling down his cheeks. He tried not to look crestfallen; tried to suppress the disappointment on his face. But he failed. "Tohru-kun! Little Yuki is here to see you!" His voice cracked, but he prayed the others wouldn't notice.

Appearing almost immediately from behind a nearby stack of boxes, Tohru approached the brothers with a bright smile. "Um, Yuki-kun, you didn't need to come pick me up!" She blushed, "I mean, I hope it wasn't any trouble for you."

"Not at all, Miss Honda," Yuki's face changed automatically, transforming from hateful to polite as soon as he spoke to the brown-haired girl. Answering in a reassuring tone, he linked his arm with hers. "I didn't want you to have to walk home alone tonight."

"Thank you!" She looked slightly embarrassed as she turned toward the silver-haired man. "And thanks for your hospitality, Ayame-san." She curtsied, bobbing her head as she expressed her gratitude to the older man.

"No, thank you, sweet Tohru," the snake replied, flipping his hair over his shoulder. "It's always such a pleasure to have guests! Come visit me any time you like!" Watching the young couple, Ayame noticed Yuki as he gave the girl a nudge toward the door. "Good-bye, Tohru-kun! Farewell, dearest little brother!" He forced his lips to curl into a smile, taking a deep breath as he felt his throat tightening. "I shall see you both very soon, I suspect." He nodded knowingly in Tohru's direction.

"Good-bye, Ayame-san!" Her voice sparkled as she headed to the door. "I'll talk to you soon!"

"Yes, yes!" He watched his brother disappear through the glass door, half-heartedly expecting the boy to turn around and offer some form of acknowledgment or farewell. But all he saw was Yuki's back guiding Tohru down the street. Ignored. Ayame hated being forgotten. 'But I ignored him when I was a child, so perhaps it's fair,' he dreaded the thought of this kind of justice, pushing it from his mind as he attempted to assure himself that Yuki would not do that to him. 'Why can't you forgive me, little brother? I want so very badly to start over!'

Sighing inwardly, the silver-haired man faced his young assistant, dispelling the tears from his eyes in hopes of convincing her of his indifference. "Please don't look at me like that, dear Mine. You're making me feel guilty!" Faking a laugh, he wiped the tears out from under his mascara-coated lashes, turning the corner and stopping dead in his tracks at the sight before him.

Hiding behind a cluster of fabric bolts, the monkey shivered with tears. "I'm so sorry, Ayame-san," his voice trembled and broke, his swollen eyes conveying his concern. "I'm so sorry."

"Oh, little Ritchan!" Ayame fell to his knees, wrapping his boyfriend in a passionate embrace. "I'm sorry you had to hear that." The other man's sobs seemed to rekindle the pain in his chest, and a flood of tears overpowered him. As he clung to the redhead's body, his façade shattered. "Ritchan," he whispered, staggering against the younger Sohma. "I'm OK, I promise. Because you're here with me."

* * *

'Hmm, finally, one thousand dollars,' gleefully fingering a stack of money, Ayame pulled a brown box out from under his bed, trembling as he reorganized the stacks of bills so as to fit the cramped space. 'Almost enough,' he thought, stashing the cash and hiding it under the worn lid. He smiled, fingering the image that he had plastered to the box cover. The Eiffel Tower. 'Someday. Someday soon!' 

"Ayame-san?" The redhead whispered meekly, knocking from the other side of the door. "M, m, may I come in?"

"Yes! Come in! Come in!" Sinking onto the bed, the silver-haired man let the box of money fall to his side, forgetting it as he studied Ritsu's ashen face. "Is something wrong, sweet Ritchan?"

"Well, um, dinner's almost ready," examining his feet, the cross dresser wrung his hands, shifting from side to side in a dance of obvious fear. "And I was, well," he glanced up, meeting the snake's stare with a comforting smile, "I was wondering if you're feeling better. I mean, after Yuki, well," he bit his lip, looking away as his face flushed scarlet. "I'm sorry! I shouldn't have said anything!"

"Oh, Monkey-chan!" Ayame's voice swelled with emotion. Ritsu truly cared. He wanted to help. 'He wants me to feel better. He is sincerely concerned about me!' His heart warmed, causing his pulse to quicken with excitement and disbelief. 'I never thought anybody would love me like that.'

Gesturing to the monkey, the snake eased the younger man onto the bed. "Oh, dear, sweet Ritchan! You're always so concerned about me! That's what makes me love you!" He reached forward, running a finger through the man's amber tresses. "You're the only person I've ever met who is interested in my feelings. My other friends, well, the only time they would show any concern was when they were afraid I might make a mess that they would have to clean up." Attempting a strained giggle, he lovingly caressed the other man's back. "But you always seem so sincerely worried. I just can't believe it! I love you so much!"

Obviously taken aback by his boyfriend's response, Ritsu reached a brave hand to touch the silver-haired man's cheek. "That's because, well, um, you're so nice to me, and I just want to, um," he blushed once more, scrutinizing the silky bedspread in an attempt to avoid the snake's gaze, "I just want you to be as happy as I am when I'm with you."

'He's getting more confident,' the dress designer realized, flashing an enchanting smile. 'Oh, Monkey-chan, I'm so proud of you!' His fingers trembled as he reached for the younger man. Cupping the redhead's cheek in his hand, Ayame moved closer, sealing the gap between them with a deep kiss. Parting his lips, he could feel his blood burning with passion. Their tongues clashed, eliciting sparks in the pit of his stomach. 'Oh, Ritchan,' he moaned, savoring the other man's warmth, basking in the feel of his trembling lips and clumsy tongue. 'I love you so much,' losing touch with his mind, Ayame pressed up against his boyfriend's body, pushing him down onto the mattress.

"Ow!" Ritsu squeaked into the kiss, blushing as he extracted a box from under his head. "Oops!" He nearly cried as a shower of bills came spilling out onto the bed. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" He pulled away from the other man, frantically scurrying to recollect the scattered money. "I'M SO SORRY!"

"No need to worry, sweet Ritchan!" Feeling bereft of the other man's touch, the snake grabbed the box, hurriedly resituating his savings. "Perhaps I should've sealed that better!" Laughing it off, he drew the man into his embrace, hoping to continue what they had started. "It really isn't your fault at all."

Fighting the urge to protest, the redhead instead appeared slightly curious. "Um, A, A, Ayame-san?" Eyeing the stacks of bills, he queried timidly. "What-."

"Oh!" Ayame giggled, understanding the monkey's surprise. "Yes, this is just a small savings I've put together over the years. I'm hoping to use it to fulfill one of my biggest dreams!" Pausing dramatically, he waited for Ritsu to inquire further, but when no questions came, he continued his tale. "I long to see Paris! The Eiffel Tower! Shopping on the Champs Élysées! The Palace of Versailles! Oh!" Clapping his hands, he appeared absolutely giddy. "Wouldn't it be marvelous, sweet Ritchan? Wouldn't it be fantastic?"

"Yes, Ayame-san," nodding, the redhead leaned against the snake's shoulder, surrendering himself to the other man's touch. "That would be really fun."

"Oh, I know!" He exclaimed. "Ever since I was a child, I've hoped to travel somewhere. Somewhere interesting and bold! But," he sighed, snuggling against the other body. "I fear that I will have to spend my whole life here, in this provincial town with little adventure to offer. Such is the curse, I suppose."

Ritsu's eyes watered slightly as he met the other man's stare. "I don't think, well, um, I think you shouldn't give up. I mean, you can't just give up on your dream like that!" Clamping his fingers over his mouth, he gasped. "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have said that, Ayame-san! I'm so rude sometimes." He giggled repentantly.

"And what about you?" Ayame snickered, kissing the tears off of the younger man's face. "I noticed that you didn't bring your painting supplies with you when you moved, sweet Ritchan. It hurts me deeply to think that you've given up when you possess so much talent!" He pouted, his eyes filling with hopefulness. "Won't you paint again, for me?"

"N, n, no, I just can't. I'm scared to. I," the monkey pulled away, sitting up and swinging his legs off of the bed, "I was stupid to think I could ever be good at anything. I'm just," he smiled sheepishly, shrugging, "pretty useless."

Ayame's stomach clenched. 'Oh, Ritchan! After all I've told you, all I've shown you, how can you still say such awful things about yourself?' His blood turned frigid in his veins as he reached for his boyfriend's shoulder. "Ritchan, please don't say those things," wrenching the other man back into his arms, he tried to maintain his smile despite the plethora of emotions bubbling in his heart. "You aren't useless at all! You're so nice to me, you help me, and," sweeping his elegant arm around the redhead's waist, he licked at the other man's ear, "you've made me the happiest man in the world."

Whirling around, Ritsu shone with adoration for his boyfriend. "Thank you, Ayame-san," he whispered, blushing madly as he pressed his lips against the snake's mouth. "Thank you so much."

Responding to the kiss, Ayame groaned with appreciation. 'Oh, dear Monkey-chan! Where would I be without you?'

* * *

**Francais avec Ayame #11**

_frere- _brother

_mon petit ami_- boyfriend

Next chapter...the big birthday bash! Or..."the spectacular event" as Ayame would say! ha ha.


	12. Shattered Teapot

Yes, as you might have guessed, I have moved into college (hence the long period of time it took me to complete this. It's not that I'm busy, it's just that it's hard to focus on stories when people keep popping in and out of my dorm room!) Well, this chapter was fun, but, as I often do when I struggle with a chapter, I got a little long-winded. Sorry about that! Ha ha!

Actually, in my original plan this was supposed to be the story's conclusion, but I changed the entire plot climax and decided to extend it a few chapters...so I'm planning on three more chapters plus an epilogue. I hope you enjoy it! So, I never expected this story to get so many reviews. I actually went into it thinking that I would just have to stay positive even if I didn't get very much reader support, because this isn't exactly a very sought-after pairing. But I am so amazed by everyone's enthusiasm! Thank you for all the reviews and encouragement! I hope I can keep living up to your expectations. :)

* * *

'Fabulous!' Winking at the mirror, Ayame tossed his shimmering locks over his shoulder, hurrying to conduct one last evaluation of his home before his brother's arrival. He turned the corner, listening to his boots as they tapped a gleeful rhythm on the slate floor. "Oh Ritchan!" As he approached the kitchen, he sniffed hungrily at the air. "That smells delicious!"

"R, r, really, Ayame-san?" As the redhead watched his boyfriend enter the room, his eyes filled with hopeful adoration. "You aren't just saying that? I mean, um, it probably won't be very good! I'm so sorry!" Bending over a steaming pot, he humbled himself under the other man's intrigued gaze. "I really want to do a good job!"

"And I know you will!" The snake sighed, floating toward the other man as he inhaled deeply. He pressed his body up against the monkey's back, teasingly stroking his thighs as he watched the teriyaki simmer and boil. "Simply divine!" Kissing Ritsu's slender neck, he giggled to himself. "I can't wait."

Unsure of whether the silver-haired man was complimenting the food or the man who prepared it, the cross dresser flushed deeply. "I, um, I, thank you, Ayame-san." He looked down, studying his apron and drab kimono with concern. "But I need to go change! I'm," he whirled around, biting his lip as he looked toward the door, "so sorry! I'm running late! I'll ruin everything!"

Clicking his tongue against his teeth in disapproval, the snake shook his head. "Sweet Ritchan, you know you won't ruin anything at all! You must stop being so self-conscious!"

"I know," the monkey dropped his gaze to the floor, shivering involuntarily, "I'm trying. I'm," tears welled up in his eyes, "I just want everything to go well for you and Yuki-kun. I know how important it is to you."

"Oh, Ritchan! You're so sweet!" Pressing his lips against the other man's cheek, he smiled brightly. "But never fear! I know everything will be wonderful! After all," he waved his arms through the air, swishing his frilly sleeves in a display of well-rehearsed theatrics, "I am an expert at giving parties!"

Agreeing whole-heartedly, Ritsu's face shone with reverence. "I know, Ayame-san! I just," glancing at the clock, he gave a startled jump. "Oh no, I'm so sorry! I need to go get ready! They're going to be here soon!" Scurrying down the hall, he whimpered loudly. "I'm sorry! I'm so sorry, Ayame-san! I'm sorry!"

The dress designer chuckled to himself, slightly amused by his boyfriend's unrest. 'I don't believe I've ever seen him so wound up! Little Ritchan is naturally a bit wired, but today he is positively jumpy!' What would have usually troubled the older man only seemed humorous given the circumstances. During the month they had spent living together, Ayame had developed a sense for the other man's moods and emotions. He could suddenly tell the difference between when the redhead was just edgy, and when he was truly distressed, and therefore could decide to respond accordingly. 'He's so cute when he gets like this! I suppose a jittery Monkey-chan is far better than a depressed Monkey-chan!'

Tapping his well-manicured nails on the table-top, Ayame paused, instantly realizing that his own insides were squirming with suppressed anxiety. 'I suppose that today I'm no better than he is!' He shifted in his seat, unable to get comfortable as he watched the clock with expectant eyes. 'I just want everything to go well for you and Yuki-kun,' His cousin's voice haunted his thoughts, casting light on his own wishes. 'I know, dear Ritsu. I know. I too desire a fabulous evening with my younger brother. Although I pretend to be confident, even I am frightened. I'm scared that Tohru will not be able to convince him to come, and I'm even more fearful that he will show no reception to my attempts at being his brother. I always try so hard! But nothing seems to bring him closer to me! I just hope this works. It must!'

Ring. Ring. Snapping the snake away from his worries, the sound of the doorbell propelled him to his feet. "Monkey-chan! They're here!" He sang, taking one more deep breath of teriyaki aroma before rushing to the door. "Coming, coming!" Checking his reflection on the metallic knob, he grinned contentedly before swinging open the door. "_Bonsoir_!" His face lit up as he surveyed the cluster of people in front of him. "So nice of you to make it on this fabulous evening!"

"Aaya!" Shigure came forward, flashing the other man a charming smile. "It's been too long! You haven't been cheating on me, now have you?"

Throwing back his head, the silver-haired man smiled devilishly. "Oh, Gure-san, do not ask me such questions when you know I can't tell you the truth!" He winked, offering the writer a 'thumbs up'. He giggled playfully. "All right!"

"Shut up already," groaning, the cat stormed through the door, refusing to offer any signs of politeness as he extracted his shoes and hurried into the kitchen. "You guys are sick."

"But that's what makes us so magnificent, Kyonkichi!" Dancing toward the orange-haired boy, Ayame squealed girlishly. "My my, aren't you anxious to get inside my lovely house!" Twisting his fingers through his hair, he gestured to the table. "Go on, make yourself at home, dear Kyonkichi. If you're really so excited about visiting me!"

"Stop calling me that!" Kyo insisted, slumping into a chair with an enraged glare on his face.

"Oh my!" The silver-haired man met Shigure's gaze with a laughing smile. "Some people never do change, I suppose!" Cackling to himself, the snake returned his attention to the door, remembrance dawning on his face. "Oh, silly me! In all this flutter, I nearly forgot!" Bowing dramatically to the two guests remaining on his doorstep, he rushed forward with exuberance. "My lovely Tohru-kun!" He kissed her hand, pausing for a moment to smile flirtatiously before directing all his attention on her companion. "And my sweet, beautiful little brother!" He caught the steely-haired boy in a hug. "Seventeen and still as perfect as ever! I'm so touched that you decided to spend this important day with your one and only older brother!"

Opening his frustrated lips, Yuki looked as if he would come back with a biting insult, but, glancing at his girl companion, he seemed to change his mind. "Hello, Niisan." He bowed begrudgingly, unspoken irritation apparent in his voice.

Ayame's heart jumped at the younger boy's greeting. Disregarding the annoyance in the rat's tone, he led his brother to the kitchen table with a renewed spring in his step. "Sweet Yuki-kun! I see we're progressing! Every day our bond strengthens, it seems!" He pulled out two chairs, offering them to his guests with a proud smile on his face. "You see, little brother. We are simply made to be together! We must thrive on each other's company to survive!"

"You sound like you're proposing to him, dear Aaya," Shigure smirked, eyeing his friend suspiciously. "And I always thought you were more into the doctor type," he gave a knowing wink, "if you know what I mean."

"Oh, but times do change, Gure!" Spinning on his heels, the snake glanced toward his bedroom door with an expectant smile. "It seems that recently I have been captivated by the shy, artistic sort."

As if on cue, the monkey emerged from the bedroom, inching down the hall and toward the cluster of people. "Ayame-san?" He squeaked, trembling as he studied the crowd in front of him. "Hello everybody." As he bowed, his tiny voice was nearly lost in the group's conversation.

However, Ayame sensed the other man's presence instantly, waving his arms so as to capture the attention of his other cousins. "Beautiful Ritchan!" He offered his guests a melodramatic introduction, acting as if they had never before seen his timid boyfriend. Reaching towards the redhead, he led him out of the shadows and into the brightly-lit kitchen, spinning him around so as to show off his sexy ensemble.

Shigure whistled, studying the cross dresser with intrigued surprise. His eyes roamed over the younger man's body, noting the way the lacy mini dress accentuated his delicate form. "So, it's true, isn't it?" The dog gave a robust laugh, sneaking down the hall and peeking into each of the rooms. "And still only one bed, I see!" Returning to the group, he elbowed the snake, a devilish grin playing on his features. "Aaya, you lucky, lucky man!"

Ritsu's eyes widened, and he gasped, fumbling with his dress as he shook his head vigorously. "No, no, I mean, I, well, I don't think, um, we haven't, I'm not," his words spewed out in a nonsensical string, crumbling under the stress of the situation. He chanced a look at his boyfriend before dropping his stare to the floor. "I'm sorry, Ayame-san! I'm-."

Ignoring the redhead's embarrassed whimpers, the silver-haired man grinned. "Oh yes, I am very, very lucky!" Sashaying pompously toward Ritsu, he draped his arms around his shoulders, offering a dazzling smile to the party guests. Ignoring Shigure's snickers and Kyo's gagging, he planted a gentle kiss on the monkey's cheek, sighing to emphasize the truth in his words. "My Ritchan has just completely changed my life! Having him here with me is simply amazing! You _should_ be jealous, dear Gure-kun!"

A groan echoed from the corner, slicing through the room's playful aura and bringing the conversation to a halt. "This is embarrassing," Yuki hissed under his breath, staring at his brother with a look of impatience on his face.

"I," Ritsu squeaked, looking from one cousin to another with fearful eyes. "I'm sorry. I-."

A dark cloud seemed to swell in the air. "Oh Yuki-kun," the snake tried to giggle, but his throat constricted painfully. 'Dearest little brother,' his lips trembled slightly. 'Surely I don't embarrass you. Surely.' The dress designer shivered slightly, racking his brain for some way to disprove the rat's words. He needed to find something that his brother could be proud of, some way to show him how much he cared. But everything seemed to fail. He was out of ideas. "Don't be such a spoilsport!" He resorted to the only method he knew to ease the awkwardness of any situation. Laughter. "If you would like, I could fit Miss Honda for a similar costume!" Winking, he offered a carefree chuckle. "Would that be more to your liking?"

Shigure laughed madly, gaining momentum from the disturbed looks on the younger boys' faces. "Oh Aaya, you certainly know how to tease." Eyeing the blush on Tohru's face, his smile grew. "Though I think you might be on to something with that one." Before Yuki had a chance to respond, however, he changed the subject, hoping to avoid any punishment that the younger boys might inflict upon him. Sighing, he sniffed hungrily at the air, thoroughly enjoying the strong aroma. "Is that _Mabodofu _I smell?"

"Oh yes, of course," regaining his focus, Ayame straightened his shoulders, his eyes flashing with vivacity. Glancing at his boyfriend's worried form, he squeezed the other man's shoulder in a gesture of encouragement. "My little Ritchan spent all day preparing the perfect meal for dear Yuki's birthday! And he is truly a fabulous cook!"

"Oh!" The monkey squeaked hurriedly, offering a desperate protest. "No, I'm-."

Cutting off the cross dresser's self-criticism, Ayame clapped his hands, grinning dazzlingly at the group and gesturing toward the kitchen. "Yes, come, come. Let's us celebrate this glorious occasion with an equally glorious party." He draped his arms around Yuki's smaller body, forcing a hug. 'Yes, Yuki,' he sighed internally, enjoying the warm contact with his brother, however fabricated it might be. 'Let's just pretend that everything is all right. Let's just hug, and forgive each other for the past. Please.' Losing himself in his daydreams, the snake barely noticed as the younger boy tugged away.

"Get off of me," Yuki hissed under his breath as he stepped backwards, keeping his voice low in an attempt to hide his dissatisfaction from Tohru. "Let's just eat, and get this over with." Sulking into the kitchen, the rat plopped onto a chair, narrowing his eyes in displeasure.

The redhead watched the exchange warily, wrapping a shy arm around Ayame's waist as soon as the guests had filtered into the other room. "I'm so sorry, Ayame-san," he moaned, choking on impending tears. "I don't want to embarrass you. I'm so sorry. I've only caused problems. I shouldn't have even come! I'll just," he buried his face in his palms, unable to meet his boyfriend's gaze, "I'll just mess up everything!"

"Oh, sweet Monkey-chan," the silver-haired man giggled under his breath, holding the younger Sohma in his arms as he nipped at his neck. "I messed up everything long ago. I'm the one who caused the problems." Snuggling against the other man's figure, Ayame melted into the embrace. His mind swirled with dreamy hopes, but somehow in the redhead's arms he found the strength to relax. "And I swear to you that you don't embarrass me. I truly am proud of you, _Mon Cher_. I love you."

A chuckle interrupted the couple's exchange. "Oh, Aaya," Shigure leaned against the door frame, clicking his tongue teasingly. "And I thought I was the only one for you." Examining Ritsu with lustful eyes, he sighed emphatically. "Though I will say that I would most definitely watch." He winked, turning back into the kitchen with a playful nod.

"Oh, um!" Ritsu nearly shrieked, blushing as he pulled away from the snake. "I better serve the meal. I, um," dashing away from his boyfriend, the monkey tripped over his own feet in his nervousness. "I'll be right back."

The silver-haired man's spirits lifted slightly as he followed the dog back to the table. He swung open his arms, surveying each face with renewed excitement. "So," he attempted to ignite conversation, leaning backwards in his seat expectantly. "How has your life been going, my dearest brother? Will you be starring in another play any time soon?"

"No," the steely-haired boy replied curtly, cutting off the dress designer. "Right now I'm busy studying for finals."

"Aw, finals!" The snake made a second attempt to connect with the younger boy. "Such a trying time. Of course, not for yours truly." He giggled, offering Shigure an amused glance. "Remember how Ha'ri used to get so riled at the end of the year? He would lock himself in his room for hours studying! Naturally, Shigure and I realized that this was far from healthy for a beautiful man such as himself, so we decided to kidnap him!"

"Really?" Tohru gave a wide-eyed squeak, looking to her friends for some explanation. "But, but, he must have been mad."

The cat rolled his eyes, kicking her softly under the table. "Don't encourage them," he commanded, sinking his head in his hands as he suppressed an angry grunt.

"But Tohru-kun wants to hear the story, Kyonkichi!" The snake nodded emphatically, flashing Kyo a triumphant look. "Would you deny our sweet little flower of anything that she asked for? I thought better of you, Kyonkichi!"

Clenching his fist, the orange-haired boy snarled slightly. "Shut the hell up," he grumbled to himself.

"Anyways!" Disregarding the cat's outburst, Ayame continued with unmatched enthusiasm. "Yes, one day right before our school administered the college entrance exams, Gure-kun and I snuck into Ha'ri's room and tossed all his books into the pond by his house. We just couldn't stand to see him stressed any longer! So we made sure that he could pull himself away from his studies to spend more time having fun with us!" Ayame chuckled, apparently thinking that he had made some brilliant cure for his cousin's stress. "Of course, he was a little bit, um, perturbed by our plan, and we had to loan him our materials until the end of the semester, but it all worked out in the end, of course."

"That it did, Aaya," Shigure joined in on the laughter, oblivious to the annoyed expressions on his younger cousins' faces.

Sitting up straight, the snake brought a finger to Tohru's pale face. "You know what I always say," he grinned proudly. "The key to success is relaxation. Poor Ha'ri could never find the power to relax when faced with such trivialities as college entrance exams, but I, of course, saw no need for such things. I already knew how smart I was! I didn't need a test to tell me that! "

"Which is why Hatori-san is a doctor," Yuki sounded exasperated by the other man's antics, glaring at him with raging eyes. "And you're a dress designer." His last words came out spiteful, and he uttered them as if they were dirty and useless. "Just a dress designer."

Ayame's stomach dropped, causing a sickening thud to reverberate in his veins. 'I'm just a dress designer to you? That's it?' Suddenly feeling humiliation stinging at his face, he avoided the other Sohma's stare. 'If I were a doctor like Ha'ri, would you love me any more than you do now? Would that make me a better brother in your eyes?' The silver-haired man had always glowed with pride at the mention of his career, but he could not muster even a brave protest under the rat's accusations. "Oh, dearest little brother!" He laughed half-heartedly, swinging his hair in front of him so as to hide the tears brimming under his lashes. "Perhaps some day you might understand the beauty of my art!"

"Um, excuse me," Ritsu approached the table, bowing over a tray of teriyaki. "Sorry for interrupting, I-." He offered Ayame a sheepish grin. "I hope everyone likes Mabodofu." Extending a shaking hand, the monkey started to serve the dish, laying a plate in front of each guest with a hopeful look on his face.

"But of course, Ritchan!" Shigure chuckled, eyeing first the sizzling tofu, and then the dress-clad cook. "So, tell me," the dog questioned, unabashedly smiling at the snake. "Exactly what type of tasks does Aaya have you perform for him?"

"I, um," surprised by the question, the redhead trembled slightly, sloshing a few droplets of tea from the kettle in his hand. "I help him sew sometimes, and try on dresses, and organize the fabrics," he seemed oblivious to the suggestive intonation in his older cousin's voice. "But I'm not very good at it!"

"Oh, I'm sure you're very good at _it_," Shigure laughed madly, more amused by his own joke than anyone else at the table. "Or else, I'm afraid, my dear Aaya wouldn't keep you around."

The redhead glowed crimson, realization dawning in his eyes. "Oh, no! I-."

"Shit!" An exclamation from across the table brought Shigure's teasing to a halt. Spitting at his plate, Kyo caught Ritsu's attention with his complaints. "Miso! What the fuck?"

"You don't like miso?" The color drained from the redhead's face as he fell to his knees. "Oh no!" His eyes darted toward Ayame, offering unspoken pleas for forgiveness. "I'm so sorry! I should have asked if everyone liked Mabodofu before I decided to make it! I'm such a horrible person!"

"Now, now, sweet Ritchan," Ayame cooed, joining his boyfriend on the floor as he attempted to silence the man's outburst. "We can just go into the kitchen and find something else for Kyo to eat. It really won't be any trouble at all." He trailed light kisses down the other man's face, trying to ease the teapot from Ritsu's trembling grasp without upsetting him any further. "Everything will be just fabulous, I promise."

"I, I," Biting his lips, Ritsu crumbled under his cousins' stares. "I'm sorry," he clung to Ayame's chest, spilling nervous tears onto his shoulder. His body quaked and convulsed with fear. "I just ruin everything. I-." Glancing at the cat, the monkey's eyes glittered with nervousness. "I'm so sorry!"

Kyo attempted a hint of politeness. "Hey, it's OK. "I'll just eat this," grumbling to himself, he forced a piece of tofu into his mouth, throwing it down with a big gulp of water. "Just shut up, will ya?"

"See, darling Ritchan," The snake rose to his feet, gracefully supporting the other man as he beamed at his cousins. "Everyone adores your cooking. Now let's just sit down and enjoy the rest of the meal," pulling out a chair and offering it to the redhead, Ayame heaved an internal sigh of relief, percieiving that he had put an end to the other man's hysterics. Grasping his boyfriend's sweaty hand, he massaged each finger as he led him back to the table. "Come on, now, sweet Monkey-chan."

Attempting to take a step, Ritsu instead found himself frozen in place, too wracked by shivers to move. "Ayame-san, I, I-." As if going in slow motion, Ritsu looked down in time to see the teapot sliding from his nervous fist. His eyes shot open as the porcelain piece shattered on the floor. "Oh no!" He shrieked, collapsing to the ground in a frantic to reclaim the scattered shards, whimpering as each sliver sliced into his hand. Splashing in the puddle of scalding tea, he screamed. "I'M SO SORRY, AYAME-SAN! I'M SORRY! I'M SORRY! I RUIN EVERYTHING!"

"Ritchan!" Ayame ran forward, his arms extended to the younger man. He no longer cared about the other people around him. Blocking out Shigure's laughter and Yuki's annoyed sighs from his mind, all he could think of was helping his boyfriend. He caught sight of red liquid gushing from the monkey's palm, causing his own heart to clench. "My sweet Ritchan! Everything is OK. I just don't want you to hurt yourself." His slender fingers closed around the other man's wrist. "Everything is just wonderful, Ritchan. We can clean this up later."

"No," ripping away from Ayame's hold, the redhead burst into heart-wrenching sobs. "No, I only cause you trouble! I'm sorry!" Finding the strength to move once again, he stumbled down the hall and into the bathroom, slamming the door behind him as he fled. "I APPOLOGIZE TO THE WHOLE WORLD!"

The silver-haired man forced a dissmissing laugh, bowing to his guests. "I'm sorry for the disturbance. But," as he approached the door frame, he turned around, winking slightly at his brother, "never fear! I shall return!" As soon as he turned away from the group, his pace quickened, his chest swelling with dread. 'Oh, my lovely Monkey-chan. It's been so long since this happened. I thought that, maybe, your hatred for yourself had subsided. I hoped that everything was better.' He grimaced at the memory of the other man's screams. 'I believed that I had helped you. I just want you to be happy.' He paused before the bathroom door, taking a deep breath in order to push the tears from his voice. "Ritsu," he inquired gently, "may I come in?"

Wordlessly inviting his cousin to join him, Ritsu turned away from the other man's concerned eyes. "I'm so sorry," he croaked. "I, I, I just wanted everything to go well. I wanted Yuki to see how wonderful you are. I just," he trembled, wiping his face on his blood-stained sleeve. "But I ruined it."

Tears prickled at Ayame's eyes as he felt his heart warm with gratitude for his boyfriend. "Oh, sweet Ritchan. You are so kindhearted! I," he took the smaller body in his arms, kissing lightly at the redhead's lips, "I love you so much." Sighing contentedly, he nuzzled his cousin's cheek, bringing tender hands to carress the redhead's wounded fingers. "Here, let me take care of these for you."

"No, no," attempting to protest, Ritsu finally surrendered to the snake's tenderness, allowing his fingers to be cleaned and bandaged. "You're always so nice to me, but I never do anything right!" He giggled nervously, trying to clear the lump from his throat. "I'm just embarrassing, I guess."

"Don't say such negative things!" Giving his boyfriend a firm shake, the silver-haired man's eyes narrowed accusingly. "Don't you know how much happiness you bring me? How Yuki and the others feel about you isn't your fault at all. The only thing that matters is that you know what a beautiful person you are!" His lip trembled slightly, and he surrendered his emotions to his companion, crying as he claimed the other man's lips in a salty kiss. "And I know that you are the most beautiful man in the world."

"I-," bringing a shy finger to the snake's face, Ritsu cleared away each tear drop. His voice dropped dramatically. "I love you, Ayame-san."

"And I love you, my sweet little Monkey-chan," bringing the redhead's fingers to his cheeks, he smiled brightly, "more than anything else in the world." He stood for a moment, focusing on the other man as if he was the only living thing in the world. Memories of their time spent together flashed before his eyes, and each passing vision cast a warm light through his body. 'I love you, and I know that, even if Yuki hates me for the rest of my life, I'll still have you beside me. I love you.' Forcing his mind to return to reality, he glanced at the door. "I suppose that I must return to our guests. I would be honored if you would join me."

Nodding bravely, Ritsu responded with a twinge of confidence in his voice. "OK, Ayame-san. Just let me clean up a little more."

"Of course, of course," flashing a reassuring smile, he twisted the doorknob, stepping back into the hallway while still keeping his focus on his boyfriend. "I will miss you every moment that we are apart!" Giggling playfully, he turned around, nearly falling backwards in surprise as he realized that he was not alone.

"Niisan," Yuki began, smiling lightly as he met the taller man's gaze. Pushing a stray lock of hair from his face, he took a deep breath. "That was very," he sighed, "nice of you."

Ayame's heart jumped in his chest, his stomach glowing with optimism as he scanned his brother's face. The rat's words danced through his mind, bringing all the joy back into his voice in a single moment of surprise. 'That was very nice of you.'

* * *

**Francais avec Ayame #12 (with a little Japanese cooking knowledge thrown in)**

_Mabodofu_- a tofu teriyaki dish marinated in a miso paste. (I hadto find a dish that Kyo would absolutely despise. lol!)

_Bonsoir_- Good evening

_Mon Cher_- my dear

next chapter...something that might force me to change the rating. he he! Yup, I'm finally doing the lime. Shigure put nasty ideas in little Ritchan's head! ;)


	13. Golden Bubbles

Ok, I'm finally finished with this chapter! Sorry for the wait! ;) (why do I always end up having to say that?) I hope everyone enjoys this chapter, because, although I almost always read stories with lemons and limes, I've never actually written anything even close, with the exception of the semi-rape scene in my last story, "Into Ashes All My Lust". It was difficult to write implied sex and still keep with the mood of the story. I hope I did OK!

So, I'm trying to work out what I will write after this story is finished. For a long time I was planningon another Furuba fic, but I've decided to try something new next time. I'm hoping that some of my loyal readers will continue to look at my works, if, of course, they're familiar with the anime I choose to write about. I was planning on writing a Kyo Kara Maoh WolframxYuuri story, but I decided that the fanbase isn't big enough and no one would want to read my story. So now I'm hoping to write a Fullmetal Alchemist EdxAl (fluff) fic, set before Al loses his body. Would anyone be interested in that? (Or should I just keep writing Furuba stories?)Please tell me what you think!

OMG, I can't believe this story almost has 100 reviews! I love you all!

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"Dearest Ritchan!" Collapsing onto the sofa with a cheery yawn, Ayame exchanged a meaningful smile with his companion. "That went simply marvelous! Everything was," letting his eyes slide closed, the snake enjoyed the warm emotions bubbling in his chest. Yuki had smiled at him. He had offered some glimmer of respect for his older brother, and Ayame accepted it joyfully. "Perfect."

"So, do you think Yuki-kun had fun at the party, Ayame-san?" The redhead questioned meekly, directing his gaze to the man seated at the opposite end of the couch. "I hope he liked it! I really-," blushing, Ritsu hid his face behind his palms, "I really think he loves you, Ayame-san."

The silver-haired man grinned at his boyfriend's brave statement. "And I love you, sweetest Ritchan. You have given me the strength to face my past. You mean so much to me," disregarding the melodrama in his words, the snake laughed softly so as to reaffirm his sincerity. "But you already know that, of course."

"I, I, Ayame-san?" The monkey quivered, glancing over his shoulder as his skin turned a deep shade of crimson. "I'm so," biting his lip, the younger man fell speechless. "I," skirmishing with his trembling voice, Ritsu could continue with little more than a smile, "so happy."

"Oh yes, _mon cher_! I understand completely!" Creeping down the length of the sofa, the older man pulled himself into Ritsu's lap, nipping at his neck with hungry lips. "Hmm," groaning internally as desire spread through his veins, Ayame took a deep breath. "You're," he giggled against the monkey's flesh. Sighing, he slid his mouth across his younger cousin's face, enveloping himself in the smaller form as he rested against Ritsu's shoulder. Inhaling the scent of the other man's hair, his heart clenched unexpectedly. Being so near to his boyfriend, he finally started to realize the depths of his passion, feeling explosions of desire pulsing in his blood, "So beautiful."

Ritsu's chest heaved as he tried to catch his breath. Each touch elicited tiny whimpers from the monkey's mouth, and his fingers dug involuntarily into the upholstery as he fought to steady himself. "Ayame-san, I," shuddering, he focused on some non-existent point beyond Ayame's head. His voice swelled with apprehension, "about Shigure-niisan-."

Breaking away from the redhead's body, the silver-haired man chuckled wildly. "Oh, Gure-kun can be quite a tease, dear Monkey-chan! Don't let him bother you."

"I, I," his eyes downcast, Ritsu carefully examined the folds of his skirt. "I was just-," trailing off, his reply came as a halted whisper. "The things he said about us," he bit his finger, clenching his fist, "I was just wondering," he chanced a wide-eyed glance at his boyfriend, "do you want to do _that_, with me?"

Ayame's heart jolted. Studying the redhead's face, he frantically sought some sign of affirmation, something to verify the other man's offer. 'Is he saying he wants to be with me?' The snake's head throbbed with surprise. "Ritchan, I," never before had the couple voiced their passions in this way. Every time they kissed, Ayame sensed an invisible boundary between them, freezing all his actions as soon as he felt the other man tense beneath his touch. He constantly struggled to keep Ritsu happy, hiding all his fantasies in his dreams. The couple had never passed beyond shy groping, though, inevitably, hearing the younger man mention sex sent the blood rushing between Ayame's legs. "Of course I do, dearest Ritsu! I've wanted to for the longest time!"

"Oh," as unease coursed through his voice, Ritsu attempted a sheepish nod. "Then I-."

Realizing that he might have jumped forward too swiftly, Ayame hurried to shackle his enthusiasm. "Naturally, I would never want to force you into anything, sweet Monkey-chan!" The snake slid off of the redhead's lap, putting some distance between them in a valiant show of self-control. He shifted his legs in hopes of hiding his swelling bulge. "Above all else I want to please you."

"No, no!" Ritsu's tone rose suddenly as he tried to meet the other man's gaze. His words came hurried and jumbled. "I mean, well, I, I want to, I'm, well," reaching a hand to Ayame's arm, he offered a weak grin. "I'm just, well, I'm scared."

Ayame's stomach clenched in his chest. 'Oh, Ritchan!' Spring to his feet in his excitement, he threw his arms around the smaller man. "Sweetest Monkey-chan! I'm simply delighted!" All his pent-up lust came rushing forth as he clutched his boyfriend to his body. "This will be amazing! Oh, don't be afraid!" Running a finger down the younger man's cheek, he winked. "I'm sure you'll do wonderfully!" Claiming Ritsu's lips in a passionate kiss, he seized the monkey's form and carried him towards the bedroom. "I want everything to be just perfect!"

The redhead trembled as the bedroom door flew open in front of him. "Ayame-san," he whispered under his breath, wrapping one arm around the taller man's neck and relaxing slightly into the arms that carried him towards the bed. "I-."

"Yes, sweet Ritchan?" Ayame paused, watching the man in his arms as he eased him onto a scarlet blanket. His heart pounded as he surveyed the vulnerable figure in front of him, knowing that he was about to realize every passion he had dreamed up late at night. 'He'll truly be mine forever,' this awareness sent sparks of ecstasy racing through the older man's blood. 'Finally I can prove my love to him.'

Giggling to himself, Ayame clapped his hands together before planting a reassuring kiss on Ritsu's lips. "Excuse me for just a moment, beautiful Ritchan!" The snake bowed to his boyfriend, winking as he backed into the hall. "I must gather a few more things to make this evening positively exquisite! I will return!"

The silver-haired man watched the monkey's eyes widen, noting his expression as it went from nervous to terrified. He turned towards the door, shooting the other man one last, loving look before dimming the lights. 'Oh, Monkey-chan. Don't be scared! I promise to give you the most spectacular night of your life!' Unable to saddle his glee, he dashed into the kitchen, extracting a bottle of golden champagne and two slender glasses.

As he tested the bubbly substance, amusing memories danced before the dress designer's eyes. He recalled his first date with the redhead, laughing at the mayhem the couple had incited over a goblet of spilled wine. 'We've come so far since that night, _mon cher_. I can hardly believe how much you have improved your outlook on life. You've learned to smile and laugh, living boldly even when you are afraid. I'm so proud of you.'

Nearly skipping back to the bedroom, Ayame gave a euphoric sigh before peeking into the dimly-lit space. Staring at his lover, he took renewed note of the other man's delicate features and the way the moonlight glimmered on his skin. In the shadows, Ritsu appeared dove-like and innocent, stretching his ivory limbs across the blankets as he unintentionally attempted to hide his body from the night air. Ayame's heart nearly caught in his throat at the sight. "Oh, Ritchan!" He grinned flirtatiously, sashaying towards the nightstand and carefully placing the glasses on the solid surface. Quivering with anticipation, the silver-haired man threw open his arms in a dramatic motion, gracefully swinging his body onto the bed. "So, how are you feeling, my Monkey-chan?"

"I'm," Ritsu's eyes twinkled slightly, lighting up his crimson face. "I'm fine."

"Hmm," the older man brought a single finger to the redhead's cheek, tracing each line with careful attention to detail. "_Trés beau_!" Desire tingled in his chest like a fireworks display on a summer night, exploding every few seconds as he felt Ritsu shiver under his touch. Replacing his fingers with his lips, the silver-haired man flicked his tongue across the sensitive flesh. "_Je t'aime_."

The monkey's eyes squeezed shut. "Ayame-san!" He squealed, resting a timid hand on his boyfriend's back. "I'm so happy we're together, I'm just so," meeting his cousin's gaze, he smiled, "happy."

"Oh yes, sweet Ritchan, I know!" Captivated by the other man's sparkling stare, Ayame unconsciously draped one leg over Ritsu's torso, moving so he could better watch his younger cousin's face. "If only you could know how long I've waited for this. It's unbelievable to me! Simply unbelievable that we can finally be together!"

Nodding wordlessly, Ritsu bit his lip, blushing madly as he leaned forward to meet Ayame's mouth with a gentle kiss. "Thank you, Ayame-san," tears clinging to his thick lashes; the monkey tightened his hold on the other man. "Thank you very much."

'He's so warm,' reveling in his cousin's desperate embrace, the taller man nuzzled the other's face. 'Oh, Ritchan. It's as if I can feel all your kindness and affection flowing into my body. Feeling your heart against mine, I finally see how much I need your touch. I need you, Ritchan.' Finding it difficult to pull away, he forced his passions to recess in hopes of retaining the moment forever. "Would you like something to drink?" He managed a husky whisper.

"Y, y, yes," as Ritsu shivered, his hands relaxed their grip on the other man's back. "If that's OK, Ayame-san. I'm," he gave a shy smile, "kind-of scared."

"No spilling this time," he teased gently, brushing a feather-light kiss on the redhead's cheek. Continuing to straddle his boyfriend, the silver-haired man took a glass into his slender fingers, filling it to the brim with golden champagne. "_C'est délicieux_," winking suggestively, Ayame leaned forward, pressing the cup to his boyfriend's swollen lips. "Just like you, dear Ritchan."

Sipping shyly at the drink, Ritsu closed his eyes, a look of pure trust crossing his face. "Ayame," the monkey sighed, breathing deeply as one of his hands wandered to the snake's thigh. "Oops!" He caught himself immediately, flushing a bright shade of magenta as he withdrew his fingers. "I'm sorry!"

The heat from Ritsu's caress lingered on the silver-haired man's skin, making him long for more. "Don't be sorry, sweet Ritsu," taking a swig of the champagne, he held it in his mouth, capturing Ritsu's tongue between his teeth. Letting the bubbly liquid dance between their kiss, Ayame knit his fingers in the other man's auburn locks, clutching him as he deepened the contact. The sensation sent him into a passionate daze, the heat drawing him in and taking control of his body. "Never say you're sorry."

Ritsu responded by nodding silently, clumsily licking at the other man's mouth in an attempt to mimic his actions. Learning from the snake's touch, he let his trembling fingers skate across the smooth fabric of his boyfriend's robe. "Ayame, I, I," mumbling into the kiss, he gave a flustered sigh, unable to communicate the vast array of emotions burning in his chest. "Please, Ayame-san."

Studying the other man's wide eyes, Ayame searched the honey-colored depths for some sort of feeling, something to tell him what would satisfy his boyfriend. "Yes, dear Ritsu," he nodded with comprehension, letting his fingers crawl down the other man's neck, fingering the first button of his dress as he bit at the redhead's collarbone. He exhaled, smiling as he worked to expose Ritsu's creamy chest to his gaze. 'I understand,' exploring the expanse of his younger cousin's body, he closed his eyes, overcome by emotion as a thousand memories enchanted his mind. Each time Ritsu had smiled. Each time they had laughed together. Every needy glance the younger man had cast in his direction. Everything seemed to culminate before him, prompting him to claim what he had worked so hard to obtain. 'Finally you're mine.'

Watching the other man's tongue slide down his body, Ritsu groaned, his body falling limp into the mattress. "Ayame," he whispered, losing control of his form as it bucked upwards to meet the snake's kisses. His fingers clutching the other man's silver locks, he giggled timidly, his cheeks painting themselves a sunset shade of red. "W, wha, what are you doing?"

The older man ignored his boyfriend's confusion, working the lacy garment down the monkey's legs and haphazardly discarding it on the floor. 'Soon, sweet Monkey-chan,' he promised silently, leaving a heated trail of kisses up the other man's thigh. As passion burned in the bottom of his stomach, Ayame savored the taste of his cousin, enjoying the shaky giggles he elicited with every nip and suckle. Grinning mischievously, he followed the warmth on Ritsu's skin, finally bringing his tongue to the place where all the younger man's heat swelled.

"Ayame-san!" The redhead shrieked in surprise, digging his nails into the other's scalp. There was no more room for apologies, no time to consider the civility of his actions. Flushing with both embarrassment and unbridled passion, Ritsu quivered in the moistness of the other man's mouth. "I, I, I love you," he managed to gasp out between moans.

"Hmm," the dress designer groaned in response, his silky hands flying over the monkey's skin. Running his nails down Ritsu's legs, he caught his ankles in a gentle-but-firm grasp, giving the other man a pleading smile as he pulled his feet onto his shoulders. He watched the younger Sohma with lustful eyes, memorizing each curve and arc with passionate interest. "Perfect," he nodded to himself, brushing a sweaty lock from his face. Jolts of electricity raced through his veins as he leaned to kiss the tears from his boyfriend's eyes. At their point of contact, Ayame's skin tingled with renewed excitement, driving him into a state of numbed consciousness. The colors of the blankets juxtaposed against Ritsu's virgin form swirled together into a chaotic oblivion before his eyes, heightening his senses to the point where each touch shot fire through his chest. "Perfect."

* * *

Ayame stared off into the darkness, trying to catch his breath as euphoria swelled in his chest. He felt Ritsu shift beside him, taking pleasure in the dreamy grin on his sleeping lover's face. 'How did I ever reject that smile?' Ayame wondered guiltily, remembering all his boyfriend's failed attempts at catching the older man's attention. 'I was blind, perhaps? Blinded by my own stupidity.' 

Ritsu twitched in his sleep. "Ayame-san," he whispered, wrapping his arms around the snake's waist in an oblivious show of affection. "Don't ever leave me."

The silver-haired man sighed, adjusting his body so as to cup his younger cousin in his arms. 'I couldn't even dream of doing so,' staring off at some fixed point beyond the cross dresser's head, he felt his heart leap with joy. 'Not now that I've discovered how much I need to be next to you.'

Riiiiiing. The jarring jingle of the telephone snapped Ayame from his daze. Stretching lazily towards the nightstand, he clutched his cell phone in his fist, trying to shake some of the sleepiness from his voice. "Hello?" He questioned half-heartedly, suddenly educing the last time someone had called him this late at night. Pain sliced through his veins, and instinctively he tightened his hold on the other man. 'But my Ritchan is right here, beside me,' he reassured himself, letting contentment overtake him once more. 'Everything is perfect tonight.' His voice regained its usual strength as he sat up. "The fabulous Ayame and Ritsu residence!"

"Ayame?" Hatori's speech came as an emotionless mumble. "Is Ritsu there?"

Giving his lover a soft nudge, Ayame giggled sweetly. "Why, yes, Ha'ri," he teased the stoic doctor. "Where else would he be but in my bed?" He kissed Ritsu's heated cheeks, brushing his red tresses from his face as he brought the phone to his ear. "It's for you, sweet Ritchan."

"Hello, Hatori-niisan," the monkey offered a timid whisper. Listening intently to the other man's voice, his face changed from nervous to stunned. "I'm so sorry!" He gasped suddenly, clapping his hand over his mouth. "She's she's," tears sprung from beneath his heavy lashes, "Is she?" He clutched Ayame's back with renewed need, trembling as he sensed the snake's comforting hands on his arms. "OK, OK, I'll," he shuddered, unable to meet the silver-haired man's worried stare. "I'll be right there," he croaked, shutting the phone and dissolving into a fit of sobs.

"Sweet Ritchan?" Ayame melted at the other man's distressed moans, clasping him to his chest as he planted feather-light kisses on every inch of Ritsu's exposed skin. "Lover, what's wrong? What's-?"

"My mom," the redhead bit his lip, nearly screaming in between desperate cries. "She's, she's sick."

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**Francais avec Ayame #13**

_Mon cher_- my dear (yup, I guess you're sick of me defining this one!)

_Tres beau_- very beautiful

_Je t'aime_- I love you

_C'est delicieux_- It's delicious (tee-hee! ;) )

next chapter...yup...almost the end. Get ready for one last bit of angst!


	14. Streaked Shadows

Happy New Year everyone! Year of Shigure...squee!- And much love for the 100 reviews! yay! I never ever thought I'd make it with this story! ;) Thanks to all of you!

Now I have togrovel and beg for your forgiveness! O.O I swear I never intended to abandon this story for so long. But, as many of you probably know, it is not easy to manage a story this long without needing a break sometime, and so I took one. I've written many stories since my last post (most of them appearing on livejournal rather than just like writing there better.XP sorry!) and through that I have developed my writing and practiced many different styles and types of pairings. So I hope I've come back to you with a better product after that long break! I swear the next chapter won't take so long :( I'm sorry! But I hope you enjoy this anyways!

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The Sohma house had never looked so lonely in all of Ayame's faintest memories. The early morning sun cast eerie shadows across the tree-lined driveway, striping the gravel path with slashes of gray. The remnants of cherry blossoms lay in heaps across the lawn, their delicate color fading away into the muddy earth. 'All that rain must've pulled them down,' reasoning with himself, the snake attempted a hopeful smile, praying that all the worry had dissolved from his face. Ritsu was not allowed see his fear. Not then. Not when Ayame knew he needed to be supportive. 

Glancing across the car seat, the silver-haired man watched as his companion tore at his doughty gray kimono. 'We've come so far, and yet he's insisting on those silly robes again,' the bubbly energy that usually resided at the center of the older man's heart was unreachable as he noted the lines on his cousin's face. He bit his lip, realizing that it was impossible to find his lover in the monkey's lightless eyes. The man that had lain before him only hours before had been a perfect image of beauty: all messy hair and blushing smiles. But that man was gone. He had run away once more.

The silence was choking him. "Oh, sweet Ritchan," swallowing the lump in his throat, Ayame painted a forced smile on his lips, slowing the car as he reached a gentle hand to the other man. "I'm certain she's doing just fine! Hatori tends to get worked up about such trivial ailments. You know how he can be, of course!" The snake's fake laugh sounded anything but comforting as it cracked in the uneasy stillness. He bit his lip, catching his breath before continuing. "Silly Hatori will probably send her home tonight with some medicine, and she'll be better by tomorrow! These things come and go-."

"It's my fault," Ritsu did not even seem to hear his boyfriend's futile attempts at reassurance, instead turning to him with a wretched frown. Worry pained his once-warm eyes. He was crumbling again. Falling back into the world of despair Ayame had tried so hard to bring him out of. "It's all my fault."

"Don't say that!" The anger in the silver-haired man's voice came unexpectedly. But he was desperate. 'I need Ritchan to be OK. I can't lose him like this. I just can't lose him! Not after everything we've done together!' He stopped the car, cringing as he buried his face in his hands, fighting to regain his composure. "Please, please don't say that anymore. You know it bothers me, _mon cher_. You really must stop saying those things."

The monkey shuddered, rattling the seat as he rested his forehead against the window. "I'm, I'm sorry," he whispered. "But, but it's true. My dad, he, he always tells me I'm making mom ill. I know I am. I-," wiping the tears from his sticky lashes, he whirled back towards the snake, giving him an empty nod. "I made her like this. I know it."

"Oh Ritchan, don't be silly," trying to forget the bony face and sunken-eyed expression Ritsu's mother always wore when standing beside her son, Ayame waved his arm in a motion somewhat reminiscent of ease. "You know it's impossible to make someone get ill. These things just happen sometimes! Trust me, Hatori is a fine doctor. Whatever is wrong with her will disappear by the end of the day! I promise you!"

Unable to wait for his boyfriend's response, Ayame applied his weight to the gas pedal once more. The car rolled towards Hatori's house, the steady rhythm only pretending to be fueled by the driver's certainty. But inside, Ayame's stomach churned with fear. He had to be right about Ritsu's mother. 'Surely my dear Ritchan has nothing to do with this!' The snake leaned back in his seat, shivering as they passed a familiar darkened window at the far corner of the main house. The wraith-like figure peering through the screen seemed to smile knowingly, a chilly smile that sent dread pulsing through Ayame's veins. Akito's smile never meant anything good. But he had to keep believing everything would be fine. He had to keep believing. For Ritsu's sake.

* * *

As soon as Ayame saw his friend, he knew there was trouble. "Oh, dear Ha'ri! Whatever could be the matter so early in the morning?" The seahorse refused to acknowledge his question, instead hanging back in the shadow of his doorway, staring unseeingly towards his cousins as they dashed out of the car. The silver-haired man's heart clenched at the unsmiling expression on the doctor's face. He had truly believed that he would receive some sort of conformation from his best friend's steady gaze, something to put him at ease and give him the strength to comfort Ritsu. 'But he looks so upset,' noting the slight quiver in his friend's lip, Ayame looked away, capturing the monkey's hand in a protective hold. 'This can't be good.' 

"Ritsu," Hatori bowed stiffly, stepping out of the way as he urged the couple into his home. His voice sounded as reserved as ever, but something was different. His words faltered as he opened the door to his office; a terrible sign that his steady façade was cracking. Offering the other two men a seat, he avoided Ritsu's gaze, seemingly unable to watch as tears trickled down the younger man's cheeks. "Ritsu, I," he took a deep breath, smiling sadly as Ayame pulled his lover into a protective embrace. "I'm sorry."

Any color that might have lingered on the monkey's cheeks drained at his cousin's words. "No, no," he was panicking, his voice sounding more and more desperate as he twisted against Ayame's body. The snake tightened his grip, trying to ignore the pang in his stomach at the other man's words. "This is all my fault. I, I'm sorry, I know I must've done this, right? It's my fault! I'm so sorry!"

"You should be," the office door creaked behind the seated couple, a new voice interrupting the conversation. Ignoring the doctor's protests, Ritsu's father approached Hatori's desk, his words coming like sheets of snow on a windy night. His eyes narrowed as he met his son's teary stare. "You know this is your fault. She collapsed last night, crying because she was so worried about you. Ever since you were born, you've been nothing but trouble for her. You've changed her. You know you have. She never used to cry before you fucked up our life."

"I," whereas Ritsu had been able to choke out audible sentences amidst the sobs before his father's entrance, at that moment his words became little more than strangled screams. "I'M SO SORRY! Please, please forgive me. I, I didn't mean it!" He smashed his grubby face into his palm, wiping a stream of salty saline across the back of his hand. "I really didn't mean to."

Gasping, Ayame could hardly believe what he was hearing. This man was his boyfriend's father. He was supposed to love and take care of his son. But, in the Sohma family, his behavior really should not have seemed so strange. 'It's just the curse,' the snake reasoned to himself, rubbing desperate fingers across the redhead's back. 'He really doesn't mean what he's saying, of course. I mean, my Ritchan is no trouble at all!' Straightening his chest, Ayame mustered a cheery tone, nudging Ritsu as he rose to his feet. "No, sweet Monkey-chan. You know he's just upset! Let's just all relax and talk this over-."

"You stay out of this, faggot," the man's voice rose suddenly as he stepped forward. His chest heaved with every angry breath he took, his eyes narrowing into a challenging glare. He seized the snake, ripping the couple apart and sinking his fist into the silver-haired Sohma's chest. "You're responsible for this, too. You've changed our son. You've changed him!"

"He helped me," everyone was surprised by Ritsu's interjection. Silence fell over the frustrated group as they turned to stare at the timid monkey. He had just challenged his father. He had just interrupted the one man he was truly terrified of. Ayame could not help but smile slightly at his boyfriend's bold behavior, knowing for sure that the new Ritsu was not lost, but had become even stronger. "He," flushing madly, Ritsu stared at his feet, shifting under his family's stares. His voice squeaked. "He loves me. This, this isn't his fault. It's mine."

"Ritchan?" The silver-haired man jerked away from the other's grasp, rushing towards the redhead and pulling him into a gentle hold. "Sweet Ritchan. It's OK. Your mom will get feeling better soon, and then we can all go talk this over." He ran his slender fingers down the shorter man's back, tracing out the line of his spine with each comforting stroke. Glancing over his trembling shoulders, he noticed Hatori's watchful gaze, shivering slightly at the pain he found in the glittering depths of his eyes. Taking a deep breath, he tried to keep up his bright demeanor. "I'm sure everything will be OK."

Dropping a packet of papers onto his desk, Hatori bustled past the couple and towards the door, giving Ritsu's father a warning stare. "Perhaps you should go back to your wife. We have a few matters we need to discuss privately."

Looking utterly defeated, the man gave Ayame one last, cold glare before whipping around and stomping into the empty hallway. "Good riddance," muttering under his breath, the snake eased the redhead against his chest, cupping him against his body as he tried to soothe the shivers racking his delicate form. Gathering the gray silk of the kimono in his hands, he pulled Ritsu closer, whispering in his ear as he struggled to maintain his hopefulness. "Shh, shh, everything's fine now. Oh, dearest Monkey-chan, I love you so much."

Waiting until Ayame released his boyfriend and helped him into a worn chair, Hatori stared down at his desk, taking in the mounds of paperwork as he seemed to evaluate his course of action. "Ritsu," his voice went stoic, the business-like manner an easy mask for any inner turmoil he was facing. Brushing a stray strand of hair from his face, the doctor offered his younger cousin a glass of water. "Here, you might need this." He turned to Ayame, giving his friend a penitent smile. "I really regret having to tell you this, but I'm afraid it's my job."

"Tell him what?" Interrupting, Ayame became more and more impatient with each passing second. The concern in the seahorse's eyes made his stomach churn, and it took all of his strength to stay seated in that office. All he wanted to do was to leave; to take Ritsu back home and pretend that none of this was happening. But he knew he could not do that. He could not run away from this like he had so many other difficult situations. He had to listen, and stay here by Ritsu's side. He had to be mature and serious for once. Because he loved him. "Oh, Ha'ri-."

"Ritsu, your mother has been suffering from stress-related illness for many years. I'm sure you're well aware of that." Hatori straightened up, pacing slightly as he fingered a packet of useless notes. "You also might have noticed that her condition has been worsening over the past few months."

"I know, that's my fault!" Ritsu squealed, burying his face in his hands. "That's all my fault. I'm sorry! I'm so, so sorry for doing this."

The doctor shook his head, placing one hand on the monkey's shoulder. "There's nothing you could have done to prevent it, I'm afraid. She brings the worry on herself. It was out of your power to stop her." Hatori fixed his gaze on a nearby wall, licking his lips as if he was struggling to find the right words. "However, in spite of my recommendation for rest and my belief that recovery is up to her, they have requested," his voice faltered as he clasped shaky hands behind his back, "other means of treatment."

"What, what do you-?" Ritsu turned to Ayame, tears brimming in his eyes as he leaned back into the other man's hold. He looked so drained, so helpless and wretched as the stark lighting etched shadows across his frowning face. "What will happen to her?"

The seahorse coughed slightly, covering his lips with the tips of his fingers as he studied his silver stethoscope. "Your, your mother," his voice broke uncharacteristically, a single tear leaking down his cheek. Ayame could not stand to watch his trustworthy friend crumbling before him. It broke his heart, because he realized the man must know something he did not. Something tragic was about to happen to his boyfriend, and he could not do anything to stop it. He gasped shakily, looking to the doctor as he heard the older man fighting for breath. "Your mother and father have decided to have her memory erased."

"What?" Ayame sprang to his feet, lunging towards the desk with a wild look of disbelief glimmering in his eyes. "No, Ha'ri, you can't be serious. You can refuse her, of course. You can't just-."

"Akito has already reaffirmed the request," Hatori's cheeks blanched as he watched the monkey crumble to the floor. "There's nothing more I can do. I-."

"She, she wants to forget?" Whispering between sobbing fits, the redhead bit his lip, trembling as he tasted the salt on his face. "She, but, she, I," rolling up into a ball on the cold tile floor, Ritsu's body tensed unhealthily under Ayame's caresses. He pulled away, lost in his own misery. "But, but, I love her."

The snake watched him, trying to understand the utter shock that was ravaging his lover inside and out. But he could not even imagine what it would feel like to vanish from someone's life forever. Nineteen years were about to be stolen from Ritsu, and he had to live knowing that all this was happening because his mother chose for him to disappear. His heart ached for the monkey as he tried to find some way to commiserate, but he could not find the strength. Words couldn't even describe the whirlpool of emotions he found churning deep within the redhead's watery stare. He could not do anything as his boyfriend fell apart. "I know, sweet Ritchan. I know."

* * *

**Francais avec Ayame #14**

_mon cher_- my dear

next chapter...the conclusion! whee!


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